DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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It would be awesome if while Phil was ranting during Mario Golf about although it being a children’s game, it is actually meant for mature adults, that he gets distracted by a buzzing noise in the wall behind his couch. Phil stops ranting and asks what the hell is going on?

Suddenly, a massive swarm of detractor bees burst from his wall, stinging Phil dozens of times while Phil screams and flails his noodle arms around.

Khet arrives and tries to defuse the situation by throwing Jasper into the room, hoping Phil’s son will fight the detractor bees but Jasper freaks out and just starts clawing the shit out of Phil with his back claws, causing Phil to scream out that he needs crowd funding natural organic support more than ever to pay his medical bills.
 
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KD6-3.7 said:
Guys… I can’t wait til the marathon this weekend. He’s gonna order out and eat food FOR US. Can ya fuckin’ believe it? I mean, ordering Sonic is one thing, but Indian food?! We may get to watch him cram chicken tikka masala and naan bread into his mouth. That’s worth at least a couple hundred bucks.
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There is nothing i'd rather spend my money on than getting to watch some pale nasally goblin burp and snort as he scarfs down fast food.

I mean, I was gonna get that 85" TV... but this is a better way to spend my cash.
 
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UncleFuckAss said:
He's already went crawling back to them once. He'll wait a little while so his whole rant demanding an apology from them will be forgotten, then he'll be back.
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To be fair we all know he wil crawl back to Twitch eventually. And if someone mentions it in his chat he will most likely get a LIMB or a blatant lie like "they apologized behind the scenes". And Twitch already has the door half opened for him since he read it out loud for us: he can apply for Affiliate in October this ywar and for partnership in April next year if his stats are meeting the requirements. The question would be if Twtich wants this old pig back or not.
 
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Balr0g said:
To be fair we all know he wil crawl back to Twitch eventually. And if someone mentions it in his chat he will most likely get a LIMB or a blatant lie like "they apologized behind the scenes". And Twitch already has the door half opened for him since he read it out loud for us: he can apply for Affiliate in October this ywar and for partnership in April next year if his stats are meeting the requirements. The question would be if Twtich wants this old pig back or not.
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I guarantee that if Phil wants to go back twitch will add him back. Even if the process to get affiliate is not automatic, Phil brought in a shitton of subs and bits for a low number of viewers/bandwidth, so he would help twitch profit margins even if just a little bit
 
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Balr0g said:
To be fair we all know he wil crawl back to Twitch eventually. And if someone mentions it in his chat he will most likely get a LIMB or a blatant lie like "they apologized behind the scenes". And Twitch already has the door half opened for him since he read it out loud for us: he can apply for Affiliate in October this ywar and for partnership in April next year if his stats are meeting the requirements. The question would be if Twtich wants this old pig back or not.
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My guess: DSP will absolutely go back to Twitch, around when they unban him from being an affiliate/partner (I think it's one year after removal?). There's no actual reason to before then, except for the embarrassment of going back on your already embarrassing rant, and it'll let him actually monetize the return. DSP will act like the unblocking from the affiliate/partner program is Twitch personally apologizing to him. Whether he's knowingly lying about it being an apology or genuinely believes it was personal, like in the coincidence of YouTube adding a function that he by complete coincidence asked their twitter autoreply bot for the night before and talked about how YouTube listened to him, is up for debate.
 
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Full Race Replay said:
I guarantee that if Phil wants to go back twitch will add him back. Even if the process to get affiliate is not automatic, Phil brought in a shitton of subs and bits for a low number of viewers/bandwidth, so he would help twitch profit margins even if just a little bit
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Of course they will. I doubt the approval process is anything other than an automated check of the necessary metrics. Why wouldn’t it be? Even if the applicant is a scumbag Twitch is so inconsistent with applying its own ToS that there’s no way there’s a manual portion. They don’t care. Even if they have to give him the heave-ho again three months down the road that’s still three months of profit they made from the wheelchair brigade.
 
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DDM stream was borked so it was just DSP's chat telling him how he's, in nicer terms, a fucking moron and everything he's saying about Assassin's Creed is wrong. I can only assume he went on some insane circle of words moving from topic to topic like some cracked out pomeranian ending up on the allegations the upper management of Ubi had against them

It's amazing, he's like George Lucas or Oprah where they get so big they surround themselves with employees who kiss their ass just Phil never got anywhere near that big, never once did something that can be seen as talented or contributing and is a recluse. So the yes men he surrounds himself with are gin fueled delusions in his head and OIC
 
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DarkSoulsPhil said:
Next retrospective (god i hope he desperately flails around for begging ideas and settles on this) he does will be his last. Why you might ask? Because he now has far fewer fans to give him content.

Think about it. His numbers have got to a point that derichs links can only carry him so far. And trolls can now send links to alllll the uncomfortable retcons he has done recently (and there is a lot). 10 year plan, insane begging, shitty cooking with the sped, divinity retcon, flight simulator retcon, xbox retcon. Thats just coming to my mind whilst i piss on the toilet in the middle of the night (blessed be 4:20am).

Can wait tbh
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I'm giving you a rainbow sticker on that if only because the Retrospective is the last part of Phil's streams that he actually enjoys. He has this big dumb grin on his face the whole time, every time, hearing himself swear and complain and shout. He can't even bother keeping up the "I was so immature back then dude!" narrative while watching himself, best you'll get is "Can't say that anymore!" and not a scrap of regret. He won't even walk back any of his temper tantrums, if Young Phil rages at a game Old Phil agrees with him 100%. And don't even get me started on how much he loves reliving his time with Rambo. If Phil had zero viewers he would host Retrospective events if only for Rambo.
Phil truly believes his Let's Playing "career" was perfect and you'd have to be fucked in the head not to enjoy it. For all his talk about "maturing", one of the few moments we see him truly happy on stream is watching his younger self be his asshole-self.
 
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What's wrong with him? Why is he sitting like that? lmao
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'Oh wow I wasn't looking and GaryBKK with the whopping $132 tip. I sure wasn't expect that all of a sudden' - Said DSP with a monotone voice.

Then, one of the variations of carl name, that I don't care to remember, tipped $50. So, the clown mode was for a good reason.
 
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UaineRunei said:
'Oh wow I wasn't looking and GaryBKK with the whopping $132 tip. I sure wasn't expect that all of a sudden' - Said DSP with a monotone voice.

Then, one of the variations of carl name, that I don't care to remember, tipped $50. So, the clown mode was for a good reason.
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when these whales leave/die/forced to use money for themselves phil is done for, its so obvious its the same 2 or 3 people over and over
 
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