Chris has been arrested

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FriendlyNeighborhoodDaddy said:
The detectives are going to trace the Chris analogue's activity to a site called "Lolcow Ranch" and its evil and callous owner Jeffery Sunn, (Ice-T will helpfully define "lolcow"). They're going to imply that the crime was egged on by the website, and Mariska Hargitay is going to have a speech about how the internet makes people into monsters.
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I was thinking that "Mango Ranch" would be a better name, but that'd be too subtle for the good folks at Universal Televsion.
 
Mr. Manchester said:
I'm no legal expert but it's clear that Chris is absolutely fucked. I thought the absurdity of the charges combined with his autism powers would stop this but no, the "additional charges pending" probably means they found evidence of Barb being demented and abused. They're probably going to toss him in prison and throw away the key.

They're going to have to throw him in protective custody immediately. I know prisoners go after chomos right off the bat and I can only imagine what they would do to a guy that did his own mother dirty. What's extra fucked up is that there's going to be at least one prisoner that knows who he is, if not all of them by the time he gets there thanks to the parade of letters and calls the prison is going to get.

Imagine it, that scene where he's walking past all the cells and the prisoners just yelling, "JUUUUUULLLLAAAAY".

Fuck man.
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Honestly I don't think most inmates have access to the internet at least in the US but I'm sure at least one guy had a phone with internet suitcased in so it's probably inevitable that they'll find the CWCki and all the horrible shit associated with Chris.

Who knows maybe he'll end up on some 23 and 1 documentary kind of thing. I can't imagine there's a lot of autists in prison, would they want to do anything with him even if there were?
Recursive Phoenix said:
If he's housed with men he'll be raped by nigs after they learn it's incest
If he's housed with women he'll be violently humilliated by buff butch lesbians
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LOL he probably still thinks it's women's prison and he'll get to find himself a boyfriend free girl in there or something. The guy is deluded.

Also LOL @ DailyMail honestly we don't know where he'll end up. Either way he'll probably be in administrative segregation. His only saving grace is that he didn't rape a child thinking it was a Sonic OC or something.
 
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Duke Nukem said:
Honestly I don't think most inmates have access to the internet at least in the US but I'm sure at least one guy had a phone with internet suitcased in so it's probably inevitable that they'll find the CWCki and all the horrible shit associated with Chris.

Who knows maybe he'll end up on some 23 and 1 documentary kind of thing. I can't imagine there's a lot of autists in prison, would they want to do anything with him even if there were?

LOL he probably still thinks it's women's prison and he'll get to find himself a boyfriend free girl in there or something. The guy is deluded.

Also LOL @ DailyMail honestly we don't know where he'll end up. Either way he'll probably be in administrative segregation. His only saving grace is that he didn't rape a child thinking it was a Sonic OC or something.
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I don’t even think Chris is aware he’ll get a severe sentence. He probably thinks he’ll go to Everfree or that the merge will bail him out.
 
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DrNow said:
I wonder if he’ll attempt to deny the charges at any point, or claim he was making it up. He seemed pretty content during his arrest, smug even.
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He doesn't understand consequences. He has gotten off lightly in the past with the dumb shit he's done (burning down house, macing gamestop employee)

He probably thinks this will all just blow over in a few weeks, so he can get back to pretending to be a woman whilst playing with lego and fucking his mother.
 
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Zeig3r said:
He doesn't understand consequences. He has gotten off lightly in the past with the dumb shit he's done (burning down house, macing gamestop employee)

He probably thinks this will all just blow over in a few weeks, so he can get back to pretending to be a woman whilst playing with lego and fucking his mother.
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Luckily, he doesn't have to understand them to be subject to them now that he's doing a bit more than attempting to kill someone with his car or assaulting people with pepper spray.
 
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More yahoo
news.yahoo.com

A timeline of Chris Chan's incest charge, which comes after years of online trolling that documented the creator's relationship with her mother

Christine Chandler faces an incest charge. Here's a timeline of the allegations, which originated with messages on online forums years ago.
news.yahoo.com news.yahoo.com

new york post
nypost.com

Vlogger Chris Chan arrested for alleged incest with mom suffering from dementia

A controversial vlogger has been arrested in Virginia for incest — after audio was leaked online of her allegedly confessing to regular sex with her dementia-ridden mom.
nypost.com nypost.com
 
Duke Nukem said:
LOL he probably still thinks it's women's prison and he'll get to find himself a boyfriend free girl in there or something. The guy is deluded.

Also LOL @ DailyMail honestly we don't know where he'll end up. Either way he'll probably be in administrative segregation. His only saving grace is that he didn't rape a child thinking it was a Sonic OC or something.
Click to expand...

If he ends up in a women's prison he might actually get assaulted if they ever find out it was because he rapist. There's no way they won't stick him with the chomos, old people and rapists.
 
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Josterman said:
More yahoo
news.yahoo.com

A timeline of Chris Chan's incest charge, which comes after years of online trolling that documented the creator's relationship with her mother

Christine Chandler faces an incest charge. Here's a timeline of the allegations, which originated with messages on online forums years ago.
news.yahoo.com news.yahoo.com

new york post
nypost.com

Vlogger Chris Chan arrested for alleged incest with mom suffering from dementia

A controversial vlogger has been arrested in Virginia for incest — after audio was leaked online of her allegedly confessing to regular sex with her dementia-ridden mom.
nypost.com nypost.com
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At least Yahoo didn't call him Chan this time
 
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weens4sleep said:
the source for their scoop is likely KF
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The Mail doesn't have sources for something like this. The "source" was a random thought in the author or editor's head and inserted into the piece because it would get a lot of clicks.

Seriously, the Mail is half a step above American supermarket tabloids. Have you ever read a news article in a reasonably respected publication about a subject you know a lot about and notice that they got a few basic facts wrong? The Mail is that times 1000. I've read stuff in the Mail about subjects I only know a little bit about, and they still manage to get numerous things wrong all the time. They don't even make it a practice to try to get basic facts right. They're all about driving clicks at the expense of respectability. No one should trust anything they write on any subject.

And I'm sure a lot of people are thinking that the media always gets stuff wrong and just wants clicks and eyeballs. And that's true! But the Mail is among the absolute worst - they don't even try to get things correct.
Josterman said:
new york post
nypost.com

Vlogger Chris Chan arrested for alleged incest with mom suffering from dementia

A controversial vlogger has been arrested in Virginia for incest — after audio was leaked online of her allegedly confessing to regular sex with her dementia-ridden mom.
nypost.com nypost.com
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The Post is similar to the Mail. There are already mistakes before you even get to the fourth word of the article - in no reality would anyone consider Chris to be known primarily as vlogger. There is no original reporting in the entire piece - they just repeat stuff that other people have written. It's about what you would expect from an outlet who published a front page article about a Twitter troll who joked that he mortgaged his parent's house to buy Gamestop stock.
 
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No Exit said:
The impending merge is just Chris' coping mechanism for death like in Jacob's Ladder. It's why the whole world runs on meme magic, we're all just figments of Chris' dream.
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Explains the high function autism claim, the CPU goddess stupidity as well as all the fucked up things happening in the world... Thanks for opening my eyes - and damn Chris, this dream sucks.
 
Truthboi said:
I don’t even think Chris is aware he’ll get a severe sentence. He probably thinks he’ll go to Everfree or that the merge will bail him out.
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Yeah he thinks the Dimensional Merge will happen and we'll have cartoon characters spilling into reality soon. I guess that means we'll finally get our anime waifus IRL and Chris's army of Sonichus will march on CVRJ and release their Lord and Master. Who will go Ultra Sonichu and destroy our world once and for all.
Anal birth said:
If you believe anything the Daily Mail report you're as retarded as Chris. We talked about it in I believe this very thread but you only go into a cell with women if your dick is chopped off.
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If you believe anything a current year journalist says you're even more retarded than Chris and Ass Log combined.
 
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stets said:
The Mail doesn't have sources for something like this. The "source" was a random thought in the author or editor's head and inserted into the piece because it would get a lot of clicks.

Seriously, the Mail is half a step above American supermarket tabloids. Have you ever read a news article in a reasonably respected publication about a subject you know a lot about and notice that they got a few basic facts wrong? The Mail is that times 1000. I've read stuff in the Mail about subjects I only know a little bit about, and they still manage to get numerous things wrong all the time. They don't even make it a practice to try to get basic facts right. They're all about driving clicks at the expense of respectability. No one should trust anything they write on any subject.

And I'm sure a lot of people are thinking that the media always gets stuff wrong and just wants clicks and eyeballs. And that's true! But the Mail is among the absolute worst - they don't even try to get things correct.

The Post is similar to the Mail. There are already mistakes before you even get to the fourth word of the article - in no reality would anyone consider Chris to be known primarily as vlogger. There is no original reporting in the entire piece - they just repeat stuff that other people have written. It's about what you would expect from an outlet who published a front page article about a Twitter troll who joked that he mortgaged his parent's house to buy Gamestop stock.
Click to expand...
Yeah someone needs to really do something original with this
 
BlueArmedDevil said:
And you wonder why the rest of the country wouldn't bat an eye if it just broke off and sank into the ocean
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You're in the for the long haul, The generation set to take over is worse than the morons already in office here.

Duke Nukem said:
Yeah he thinks the Dimensional Merge will happen and we'll have cartoon characters spilling into reality soon. I guess that means we'll finally get our anime waifus IRL and Chris's army of Sonichus will march on CVRJ and release their Lord and Master. Who will go Ultra Sonichu and destroy our world once and for all.
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People forget, most of us are supposed to die before it happens. I wonder if Chris is Larping COVID as the thing that's supposed to kill us all.
 
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