Horrorcow Lucas Werner - A man of Spokane, Washington who is obsessed with millennial and Gen Z chicks

[mothman96]

It's probably true that these are the most beautiful women Pukeass has ever seen; he's used to ladies with the Spokane phenotype (gross face, no ass, huge pudgy tits). The low gene-pool quality here makes the exclusiveness of his Love Quest to our city all the more ironic...

Spokane makes list of least attractive locals

On the list of the top nine least attractive cities, Spokane came in at number three.

www.google.com

Could be the women he saw in LA were comparable to what he drools over in Spokane. They just have to be teenage and not fat.

 

[IceQueen]

If he is so willing to take little blue pills I have one that would be much more appropriate for him:

They might actually keep him in line



I doubt they want anything to do with him directly, but they absolutely keep tabs on him to some degree, likely to see if he does anything overtly stupid that might come back on the rest of the family. After all I doubt they were too impressed with the attention they must have got from lucas talking creepy about his niece, that soliciting kiddie porn from that 17 year old in VA and the starbucks incident. They probably jumped right on the LA stuff cause one of them said 'uhh....guys he just went to LA to meet a woman....this might end up on the news' thinking it was some underage girl he manipulated into a to catch a predator moment, and they jumped on it out of concern for ending up getting all kinds of attention they don't want if he got busted for something, rather than out of concern for lucas. It was pretty much a 'stfu and sit in a hotel room you stupid shit and don't do that again' moment, its the only reason they would have bought him the room


Myrna doesn't give a shit about lucas, except insofar as he might make her, her family (and by extension her directly) look bad. Dumbshit that she is herself, even she knows lucas is infamous enough that if he gets chris hansen'd doing something like the LA trip, somebody in the media is going to snoop around and want to stick a camera in her face to comment about it, and if that journo digs even a little deeper they'll find kf and stuff like the VA teen incident she is screenshotted in trying to deflect on his behalf

Okay this is kind of a niche thing, but hear me out … Does anyone on here watch Criminal Minds? If so, do y’all remember the two part episodes “The Inspiration” and “The Inspired”? The initial unsub, Wallace Hines, does bear some similarity to Lucas, but he’s a lot more stable at first at least, (he has an apartment and a job). He also murders women who he feels have slighted him.

But while Wallace does have some similarities with Lucas, I feel like his mom is Myrna to a tee. The episode has a lot going on and I won’t explain it all here, but basically Wallace is a twin (but doesn’t know it) because the mom gave up his brother Jesse when the two were babies because she couldn’t take care of them both. When she gets interviewed by the FBI, she says that she as a mother “deserves better”. It’s clear that she regrets choosing Wallace over Jesse since Wallace ended up being a fuck up (except surprise, Jesse ends up killing people too!), and is only thinking about it in terms of herself. That is SO Myrna.

Myrna never even mentioned Shawn (Lucas’ older half brother, so Myrna’s first husband’s son). She didn’t care about Shawn because he wasn’t her own. Then she had Lucas and she ooh and aahs all over the place about how he’s such an amazing baby, she could never love anything more than him, etc., and that he is her “baby boy”, and at least that last part has continued to this day. She is undoubtably bitter that he didn’t become someone who makes her look good. I have no doubt that she’s angry that he in fact makes her look BAD. She’s narcissistic in that way just like the mom from those two episodes. She just wants a nice life for herself and her kids, and she’s washing her hands of people who stand in her way, even when they’re her own kids.

Now this isn’t to say I think or thought that Myrna should keep enabling PukeAss forever. He’s a shit stain on our planet and a horrible person. But Myrna isn’t great either.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

Lucas is firmly in the incel classic mindset of “you need to be physically perfect and submissive, but also why can’t you love me for my personality”. They give themselves extra points for all their lovely personality qualities, while completely disregarding the same in a potential mate and only ranking based on looks and a sort of submissively vague pleasant personality. As long as she’s “nice” that’s good enough, but she also better be utterly devoted, make him feel good about himself, always sexually available and above all, insanely hot.

What does the incel offer in return? Sometimes people say he’s funny. He’s a nice guy. You shouldn’t judge him based on his mediocre looks because that’s shallow…but he can judge any girl on her looks because Nature and Biology and Healthy Mate, can’t help it, male instinct.

The girl can’t judge him as a good provider based on female instinct, though, that’s golddigging and shallow. And anyway he only makes bare wages and his car is shite.

Femcels, especially obese ones, are the same way. Admire and worship my plentiful rolls and curves, but you’d better have abs and a chiseled jaw. Moaning that men are horrible for not wanting to date morbidly obese women, but then claiming it’s just “a preference” that they want a fit man, and you can’t call them hypocrites.

Lucas is no different than all the incels out there who demand perfection in a mate, while excusing themselves from being perfect. Love me for exactly who I am, flaws and all. But you’d better not have any flaws.

Luckily beggars cannot, in fact, be choosers, so being a 3/10 and demanding a 10/10 works about as well as trying to rob a bank by sending them a threatening letter and enclosing a stamped return envelope for them to put all the money in.

Most incels recognize they're ugly, or stupid, or poor, or have some fault that they can't possibly fix and women will never overlook.

Lucas is much worse than that. I've watched hundreds of hours of his stupid videos, and he has never once admitted he was wrong or any faults with himself.

 

[Wernology]

Most incels recognize they're ugly, or stupid, or poor, or have some fault that they can't possibly fix and women will never overlook.

Lucas is much worse than that. I've watched hundreds of hours of his stupid videos, and he has never once admitted he was wrong or any faults with himself.

Lies!

He frequently says he has "skinny arms" because that's...a flaw, I guess.

I'll give him 50% credit for admitting he has a microdick (and only 50% because, while that would be a dealbreaker for a lot of women, a guy with a small dick but a great personality and other skills in the bedroom could pretty easily overcome that, pun intended, shortcoming) and 25% credit for acknowledging he has anger issues but no more credit because he immediately says he only has those anger issues because nobody will fuck him.

 

[A Big Bumbling Black Man]

I'll give him 50% credit for admitting he has a microdick

You'd wanna give him credit for being honest about his microdick but he still tries his best to hide his dish plate-sized bald spot, so it could just be a classic red herring.

 

[Wernology]

You'd wanna give him credit for being honest about his microdick but he still tries his best to hide his dish plate-sized bald spot, so it could just be a classic red herring.

Honestly, it's extra funny to me that he admits to the microdick but will insist he's not balding despite there being more easily accessible photographic evidence of that than the microdick.

Like you gotta go looking for the Lucas dick pics, and you're really only going to find them buried in this thread. His bald spot shows up in his own public photos.

 

[Fatal Walter]

Excuse me, Lucas clearly said he was maybe one step above a micro penis. At least the time I heard him say it

 

[mothman96]

Excuse me, Lucas clearly said he was maybe one step above a micro penis. At least the time I heard him say it

Well he thinks he's a silver back, a silver fox so he'd look down at his stub and say oh yea that's a "mega" micro dick.

 

[Bassomatic]

Not that I'm suggesting this. I'd wonder how Lucas would react to his own "Kacey" saga. Or for those not well versed in Christory a troll who tries to motivate for better.

Lucas is thinner skinned than Chris so would be a ton of ass kissing and spin but, I wonder how he'd deal with being called a snob for eating at fancy places. He's so caring smart with no job why not help at a shelter? Red cross etc?

The mental gymnastics he'd had to partake in would be the only work out he gets aside his dead leg waddle to next food pantry.

I'm sure he would do nothing to improve himself or help his fellow man but being ego boosted by a gen Z bae while asked to do good I'd really wonder his reasoning to skip out or more so watch his insane attempts (Chris chan picked up a 12 pack of soda to prove he's working out) so Lucas insane antics could be way better. Up there with when he video taped the passed out girl "look I'm a feminist not raping her".

 

[wenttobermuda]

Not that I'm suggesting this. I'd wonder how Lucas would react to his own "Kacey" saga. Or for those not well versed in Christory a troll who tries to motivate for better.

Lucas is thinner skinned than Chris so would be a ton of ass kissing and spin but, I wonder how he'd deal with being called a snob for eating at fancy places. He's so caring smart with no job why not help at a shelter? Red cross etc?

The mental gymnastics he'd had to partake in would be the only work out he gets aside his dead leg waddle to next food pantry.

I'm sure he would do nothing to improve himself or help his fellow man but being ego boosted by a gen Z bae while asked to do good I'd really wonder his reasoning to skip out or more so watch his insane attempts (Chris chan picked up a 12 pack of soda to prove he's working out) so Lucas insane antics could be way better. Up there with when he video taped the passed out girl "look I'm a feminist not raping her".

Lucas has proven very resistant to this style of trolling. His catfish have worked angles like this before.

One of Lucas's old refrains was something like: Whatever advice you're going to give me about fixing my life, I've already implemented and things are going swell. I've lost 200 lbs and given away lots of EBT.

He grows quickly impatient with tall of self-improvement.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

Not that I'm suggesting this. I'd wonder how Lucas would react to his own "Kacey" saga. Or for those not well versed in Christory a troll who tries to motivate for better.

That's basically what that one podcast did with some fat harpies blathering on about how successful they are while berating Lucas... and he just laughed it all off while only doing it for free sammiches, as he should have. It wouldn't phase him.

 

[Da Dude123]

Lucas above all, believes that he is plenty good, and can't understand why others, especially, Gen Z baes, the ovulators don't think so too. Now, as for the Gen Z baes, he bases why they should like a hobo ragman who sleeps in the woods like a bear, wears the same dirty clothes for weeks at a time, carries an Incredibles backpack. Well, he has determined almost all of generation Z are socialists. And to Lucas that means that they should hate money.

After all, they love Bernie Sanders and AOC. Therefore, they should date, and ultimately marry and have children with an obese ragman. The ones who don't? Well. they are hypocrites and bigots. All the verses in the bible that talk about greed. Reeee! Lucas bases his whole life on this belief. Now, when Lucas gets a hold of some money like Biden bux or brags about the money his parents have that he assumes that he will be given (yes, the same parents who don't even have his phone number) then he is a big shot oligrach and all the baby zooms should come running to him.

It really is a shame that the cow is able to use the system like this. For most working people with health insurance, they would have a humongous bill if they spent two weeks in an inpatient medical facility. But for Tubby we will cover it cause he is a Sped on disability. Have the cow charge up his phone and then kick his ass back on the streets of Spokane. Hell, drop him off at the woods.

 

[Wernology]

Excuse me, Lucas clearly said he was maybe one step above a micro penis. At least the time I heard him say it

My bad, he has a "mega micro penis" not just a standard micro penis.

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

It really is a shame that the cow is able to use the system like this. For most working people with health insurance, they would have a humongous bill if they spent two weeks in an inpatient medical facility. But for Tubby we will cover it cause he is a Sped on disability. Have the cow charge up his phone and then kick his ass back on the streets of Spokane. Hell, drop him off at the woods.

The Medicaid system doesn't allow you to do this for long, though. I'd be surprised if Lucas hasn't already been kicked out and left in the woods.

 

[mothman96]

The Medicaid system doesn't allow you to do this for long, though. I'd be surprised if Lucas hasn't already been kicked out and left in the woods.

I'd say if the Freak was out of the loony bin we would have already heard him again spewing how Frontier Behavioral Health dumped him out to the street to die like a dog.

 

[Maxxicus Callahan]

The Medicaid system doesn't allow you to do this for long, though. I'd be surprised if Lucas hasn't already been kicked out and left in the woods.

I'd say if the Freak was out of the loony bin we would have already heard him again spewing how Frontier Behavioral Health dumped him out to the street to die like a dog.

I hope he turns his misfortune into an opportunity to show lady Z that he is plenty good father material by his ability to build a forest shelter and cook eggs over a fire. He should start a Spokane bush crafting video series showing his rugged survival skills as a homeless older daddy.

Lucas would go pretty crazy in the woods all by himself (edit: I could see him yelling at the trees, “Drug dealer!”) With a brain like that I wouldn’t want to be left alone in isolation either. He is definitely a bad influence on himself but oh well too bad so sad he got kicked out of all the shelters and now the psych ward, guess he should have thought about that sooner.

Lucas is firmly in the incel classic mindset of “you need to be physically perfect and submissive, but also why can’t you love me for my personality”. They give themselves extra points for all their lovely personality qualities, while completely disregarding the same in a potential mate and only ranking based on looks and a sort of submissively vague pleasant personality. As long as she’s “nice” that’s good enough, but she also better be utterly devoted, make him feel good about himself, always sexually available and above all, insanely hot.

What does the incel offer in return? Sometimes people say he’s funny. He’s a nice guy. You shouldn’t judge him based on his mediocre looks because that’s shallow…but he can judge any girl on her looks because Nature and Biology and Healthy Mate, can’t help it, male instinct.

The girl can’t judge him as a good provider based on female instinct, though, that’s golddigging and shallow. And anyway he only makes bare wages and his car is shite.

Femcels, especially obese ones, are the same way. Admire and worship my plentiful rolls and curves, but you’d better have abs and a chiseled jaw. Moaning that men are horrible for not wanting to date morbidly obese women, but then claiming it’s just “a preference” that they want a fit man, and you can’t call them hypocrites.

Lucas is no different than all the incels out there who demand perfection in a mate, while excusing themselves from being perfect. Love me for exactly who I am, flaws and all. But you’d better not have any flaws.

Luckily beggars cannot, in fact, be choosers, so being a 3/10 and demanding a 10/10 works about as well as trying to rob a bank by sending them a threatening letter and enclosing a stamped return envelope for them to put all the money in.

It’s funny how some incels set themselves up for failure like this. Elliot Rodger is a prime example where you have to wonder if they were even attracted to women in the first place given their impossible standards or maybe it was their their attempt at replicating the idea of what they think other men attracted to women want. It’s like an alien trying to pass off as a human male saying I like blondes with big tits.

Granted there are incels who genuinely struggle for reasons of looks, poverty or mental illness and without any imminent threat they have found a way to articulate a situation they struggle with that no one talks about openly, like you can’t say to someone you are so ugly you won’t get laid but it’s a very real experience for some.

The weird part is how incels like Lucas make these sorts of broad sweeping generalizations about the Stacey and the Becky or the Virgin and Chad. There is something very autistic or similar there to whatever Lucas suffers where he can view women as an entire generation not listening to his plight. It’s so weird when you think about that meme everybody laughs at but then think that some people actually take this to heart and group random individuals they don’t even know into a hive and convince themselves that these aren’t individuals with their own thoughts and feelings.

Spoiler: Attractiveness Sperg

I claim we aren’t attracted to 10/10 if anything it’s perfect imperfections or the attractive quality of being perfectly imperfect that is the more attractive quality. It sounds weird to say but I think there is an intimidating factor to perfection, no blemishes, no warts or anything wrong is actually kind of off putting in a way. No ones (for the most part) sees them self as perfect so why would they go for 10/10. Its I think nicer for some room left there even if it’s 9/10 or 7/10 like being slightly heavier or having moles or freckles adds an attractive quality of its own in my opinion, it adds character.

I think the incel’s standards are so absurd when they think they can force some ideal fantasy with that 10/10 they’ve dreamt up. Clearly some of them think they are deserving of perfection which I find interesting. I mean if you are rich and shallow you could find a fashion model but then you’ll probably cheat on her for some other beauty queen eventually because you will get bored if that’s what you are interested in. These types of incels long for a type of relationship I don’t think even exists like someone longing to live in an idealized vision of the past, they don’t really understand the give and take in it all. If it’s mainly just to be seen as secure in status as having a gorgeous woman on your arm for validation it’s something else they are struggling with than just wanting to be in a relationship.

 

[IceQueen]

I'd say if the Freak was out of the loony bin we would have already heard him again spewing how Frontier Behavioral Health dumped him out to the street to die like a dog.

Agreed, and also when he was in the waiting room at Kalispell he said he can stay there for 30 days. So I would say that if that’s true, he’s definitely trying to stay the full month.

 

[Screed]

I guess it's going to be another long wait followed by a month's worth of content shoved into a few days, a very visable impending mental breakdown, then back to the funny farm again.

What's your prediction for the topic he's going to hyper focus on the next phase of the Wern Cycle? He already covered telomeres extensively last time so my bet is a mixture of gen Z bullshit (as always) and autistic socialist ideas about paying doctors the same as fast food employees. Maybe some stuff about how his parents are gorillionares with bounty hunters (so you better think twice about jumping bail I guess?) and all the elk you can eat sprinkled in there somewhere.

 

[GleamingTheQ-Bert]

I guess it's going to be another long wait followed by a month's worth of content shoved into a few days, a very visable impending mental breakdown, then back to the funny farm again.

What's your prediction for the topic he's going to hyper focus on the next phase of the Wern Cycle? He already covered telomeres extensively last time so my bet is a mixture of gen Z bullshit (as always) and autistic socialist ideas about paying doctors the same as fast food employees. Maybe some stuff about how his parents are gorillionares with bounty hunters (so you better think twice about jumping bail I guess?) and all the elk you can eat sprinkled in there somewhere.

"He already covered telomeres extensively last time"?

Are you new here? He's been obsessing about the same shit with telomeres for the past 5 years.

The new addition last time was the electric sperm, Van der waals forces, etc.

Other than a few new additions like this that he reads on Wikipedia when he's in the psych ward, he repeats himself endlessly, and nothing short of a lobotomy or a head injury is going to change that.

If you know anything about Lucas's history as a lolcow, you'll know that even his longest hospitalization, which was almost a year, didn't break his demented thought process about any of this shit.

I highly doubt anything ever will. His entire ego is too invested in this lie, it's too comfortable, gratifying as it does both his narcissism and his laziness.... Which are the two strongest aspects of his personality.

 

[JimmyNugget]

I want more board games as an excuse for wern to complain about women more.