Conrad Aaron Collins / Diginée / Digibro / Digibrony / Otaku Gonzo Journalism & the Pro Crastinators Podcast - Pedophile, Two-Faced Weeaboo Ponyfag Youtube Analyst Who Wants to be a Loli + Drama, Friends & Enemies

[MRK]

In every "trans" kid example I've seen, every single one, it's a mother encouraging it, and the father is either submissive to the mother or absent. I doubt there would be much of a "trans movement" at all if it wasn't for bored liberal white women.

I think that if a person reaches a certain age (probably younger than 30) without ever having consistent work, it's not going to happen. I haven't ever seen someone above that age end up living a productive life.

Spoiler: One big happy...

Spoiler: family!

 

[Bad Take Crucifier]

Dear God, his father is a Chad. But his mom is a dangerhair. Did Digi inherit only mental illness genes from his mom or something?

 

[Keeper of Locks & Keys]

Dear God, his father is a Chad. But his mom is a dangerhair. Did Digi inherit only mental illness genes from his mom or something?

Yeah that picture of his mother speaks volumes. I rest my case your honor.

 

[Misato's Armpits]

At least he still has Victor and Shade.

 

[Cobalt-60]

Yeah I take it back. Digi is just going to be a basement dweller until his parents die. Arguably worse than Chris Chan because he doesn't even have autism impeding his ability to function, he's just too arrogant and lazy to commit to a day job.

 

[High Tea]

Spoiler: One big happy...

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It looks like Digi is trying to turn themselves into their mother. What kind of Oedipus/Electra mashup complex is this?

 

[NotTheBooks]

Is automamaphilia a thing?

 

[the_watcher]

It looks like Digi is trying to turn themselves into their mother. What kind of Oedipus/Electra mashup complex is this?

I take 'Norman Bates' for 500

 

[SeaVulture]

That one's easily his creepiest photo yet, it's like he's trying to look like a little girl in her underwear. Goes with the whole infantilisation thing he's been doing for a while, a ton of troons go through an "I'm a cute soft girl uwu" phase but he's just in pure arrested development.

It looks like Digi is trying to turn themselves into their mother. What kind of Oedipus/Electra mashup complex is this?

I take 'Norman Bates' for 500

He's literally said that he views his gender identity as "clone of his mother". If you let me play armchair psychologist for a bit, it seems like he's trying to recreate the time of his life when he remembers society perceiving him that way.

I now know that children apparently develop their sense of gender identity at ages 3-4, before they are even capable of the kind of logical thought that would let them understand it. My best guess is that my self-impression was just wholly that I was a clone of my mom, since I looked exactly like her and spent all my time with her with my dad being in the Navy. Because I am categorically "male" I saw it as "whatever I am must be a boy because I am a boy" and yet girls would actively argue with me that I WAS a girl based on my attitude and appearance. I think my anger over them being categorically "wrong" drove my thinking on some level from that point until the day I finally understood what it actually means to have "emotional intelligence," and realized that I am much better at that than logic, but that I can't embrace that way of thinking/living without admitting my own self-impression of femininity.

Side note, is it me or does that text read like how a character in a bad anime delivers exposition? All those concepts in quotes and the way the ideas are generally presented in that text are the result of someone who learnt to express himself from reading too many manga scans and anime fansubs, right?

 

[JokahBaybee]

Edit: as I was typing this it somehow became the topic of conversation. I do think much of Digi's happiness is based in delusional positivity and going to collapse, but also I think they genuinely do feel relieved to have shaken off several years of accumulated bullshit. They are working very hard to replace it with a new pile of bullshit, but at the moment it's relatively close to reality (Digi believes themself to be and actually is a struggling rapper) and at least has a few anchors (crowd reactions and IRL feedback).

Hard to believe, but Digi has been doing relatively well lately. Mooching off of parents and being a mediocre rap performer isn't exactly laudable, but compared to what I would have expected even a month or two earlier, it's really not that bad. If you ignored the aspects which are connected to their career as a pony/anime YouTuber, he's just another 30yo washout with unrealistic expectations. It's unfortunate, but not really Lolcow behavior.

I used to be a fan of Digi's, and when they started going off the rails, the most frustrating part of it was how self-contradictory their explanations were, where they were driven by artistic integrity and hedonism and rational self-interest. This hit a low point in the Oki interview when Digi was lucky to go 30 seconds without invalidating what he had just said, which even Oki got annoyed with here and there.

Even if you assume Digi does want all of those things and simply cannot accept trade-offs, they've also made bizarre decisions which either make tiny gains for one goal while destroying the others (selling classic merch for pennies on the dollar) or literally only hurt them (privating the videos weeks early). Yes, Digi lacks common sense, but they've kept this going for too long to be that stupid.

I eventually decided that if you ignore what Digi says and look at their decisions, those explicit goals are there, but the real one is more personal. If you assume that Digi's primary motivation is to hide from the emotional consequences of the life they have lived, I can't think of a single decision they've made in the last six months (if not longer) which doesn't fit that explanation.

I can't know, but I have a feeling May was a bigger part of this than Digi lets on. Those two spent years going through the motions of a committed relationship, and when she left him for Ralph, it would have recontextualized all the time they spent together, with Digi seeing that what he had thought of as luck (finding someone who accepted him) was really him being too shit with social cues to realize he was being used (May not contributing more to their lifestyle was such a colossal red flag).

Adding in debt, the fragility of online friendships, and the problems with his YouTube/Patreon career creates a situation where Digi would have been confronted with how fucked they would be once the luck ran out. His money and special treatment could disappear overnight, but the clips from TDS would be around forever, leaving Digi in a financial/social hole so deep that even a functional adult might take decades to recover, let alone a stunted manchild who barely has the skills to be a YouTuber.

While it might have been more gradual and less dramatic than that, I think Digi got a glimpse of raw, un-narrated reality, and everything since then has been a frantic attempt to stuff that genie back into the bottle. By letting Riley basically run their existence, Digi created an unspoken agreement that he can rape the "digibro" legacy in exchange for maintaining a fantasy life where they are an up-and-coming rap crew who are always on the cusp of a big break; and by being an unrepentant asshole to anyone who doesn't unconditionally validate their personal narrative (or who challenges their behavior in general) they purged all social contacts who might shatter their illusions (like others have said, Ben being 100% pro trans was a big problem for Digi's bullshit).

I feel like them running back to their mother is just a more literal version of what they've been doing for nearly a year now, and in a way it's satisfying. I doubt this is actually rock bottom (I'm sure they could make it worse) but the degree to which this thread has slowed down shows that they've at least leveled off, and it does seem like they've settled into a new phase of life. I don't believe for a second they are doing the work it would take to become a legit rapper, but they are doing better than expected.

That Digi merely reverted to adolescence rather than ending up dead or in prison is not a great accomplishment, but it's probably closer to his actual level of development than the larping of the May saga; and even if hip hop is a delusional get-rich-quick scheme, being a low-level performer is going to going to give Digi way more life experience than watching anime, as well as less material for crafting mental illnesses. Confronting his mistakes and growing as a person would have been the actual right decision, but Digi at least managed to torch his life (which was legitimately disgusting) in way that left him with a support structure and occasions to go out into the real world.

We'll see how long this holds up, but it feels like we've hit the point where Digi got everything they wanted (minus the RV). Everything they were going to lose is already gone, and after Saint gets bored they will have about as tranquil an internet presence as they ever will. All they problems they are ignoring are waiting in the wings, but day-to-day they can just smoke weed, get makeovers, and rap. In a weird way I'm almost happy for him.

In every "trans" kid example I've seen, every single one, it's a mother encouraging it, and the father is either submissive to the mother or absent. I doubt there would be much of a "trans movement" at all if it wasn't for bored liberal white women.

I think that if a person reaches a certain age (probably younger than 30) without ever having consistent work, it's not going to happen. I haven't ever seen someone above that age end up living a productive life.

I guess you could say he is, now and forever, out of it.

Out Of It

INSTRUMENTAL: 4 Hours (in the afternoon) by White Heaven I been driftin' in and out of every short day just sortin' thru my feelings in a roundabout way and seeking to discover at the heart of malaise

soundcloud.com

(embed won't work idk why)

 

[Keeper of Locks & Keys]

I guess you could say is, now and forever, out of it.

I don't get it. The trannypill so potent. A new community that supports open hate towards anyone not accepting. Maybe Digi was always this way. But I don't think so.

While enjoying my day off I was playing some vidya (Factorio and Anno 1800 specifically) while listening to Tommy Oliver's lecture on Animorphs once more (which is actually good, go listen to it).
What I got was a good and entertaining video on the book series, but I noticed something different; something I noticed many times earlier with other lectures; the old times. Digi interacting with his buddies and asking actual good questions that are relevant to the topic (like Nate).

As Amanda or other GF's were not welcome on that event, I wonder if this was one of the last times Digi was Digi. I wish we were nearing the endgame as I don't care for a slow burn, but that seems to be what we get.

EDIT: Call me mad, but in truth I've found others to replace Digi a long time ago. I just would like a one on one talk in a room with the man (yeah not calling him a woman ever). It would probably drive me mad. But I'd be willing to try.

 

[Fuck It We'll Do It Live]

Side note, is it me or does that text read like how a character in a bad anime delivers exposition? All those concepts in quotes and the way the ideas are generally presented in that text are the result of someone who learnt to express himself from reading too many manga scans and anime fansubs, right?

As bad as his career is at the moment, be it rapping to tens of wiggers to living with his parents begging for mommy burger money, mid-2020 was truly Digi at his lowest (while May continues to plummet to even lower depths), as encapsulated by that impotent and cringeworthy raid of his and May's of this thread by defending themselves in both the first and third person against the damn dirty Kiwis. You would think those who have spent their entire lives online would have known better than to try to troll the haters to get some "win", and not look like completely desperate seething butthurt lolcows on the site that DOCUMENTS the very phenomenon.

It reminded me of this meme of Tumblr's equally embarrassing "raid" of /pol/ and /b/ in 2014:

Spoiler

I guess you could say is, now and forever, out of it.

Out Of It

INSTRUMENTAL: 4 Hours (in the afternoon) by White Heaven I been driftin' in and out of every short day just sortin' thru my feelings in a roundabout way and seeking to discover at the heart of malaise

soundcloud.com

(embed won't work idk why)

https://soundcloud.com/digibro%2Fout-of-it

Weird.

I don't get it. The trannypill so potent. A new community that supports open hate towards anyone not accepting. Maybe Digi was always this way. But I don't think so.

The putting of troons on a pedestal is what makes someone as civil libertarian and disobedient as Ben Saint (he still mocks disingenuous IdPol arguments and the like) look completely fanatical and puritanical over incorrect pronouns instead of being based. He has got to a point where and the same five-six people he talks to in his Discord openly hate "truscum" and "transmedicalism".

As Amanda or other GF's were not welcome on that event, I wonder if this was one of the last times Digi was Digi. I wish we were nearing the endgame as I don't care for a slow burn, but that seems to be what we get.

I completely agree; young creative men sometimes need a completely male space (or at least with women who aren't hyperfeminised or feminists) to shoot the shit and goof off with each other. GFs need to be left outside the door, especially aggressively interfering types like May. Again, something Ben was absolutely correct to put his foot down on.

EDIT: Call me mad, but in truth I've found others to replace Digi a long time ago. I just would like a one on one talk in a room with the man (yeah not calling him a woman ever). It would probably drive me mad. But I'd be willing to try.

I'm either torn between being the accepting liberal/centrist that I tend to be and therefore be willing to call him "Trixie/B." and use female pronouns (I'm still going to refer to him as "Digi" as well though, that's how I've aways known him) and not wanting to both pander to this stupid new culture and enable a man's undiagnosed mental illnesses and his delusions.

 

[Omnium Ultimatus]

For those that guessed Alphabet Review of Evangelion, It is now confirmed to be the next one after Digimon.
View attachment 2481890

I guess going by the Japanese titles was too much for Digi. I knew he would cheat, but I didn't think he would do so this early.

EDIT: Call me mad, but in truth I've found others to replace Digi a long time ago. I just would like a one on one talk in a room with the man (yeah not calling him a woman ever). It would probably drive me mad. But I'd be willing to try.

Just out of curiosity - Who are those others?

 

[Some Badger]

He's literally said that he views his gender identity as "clone of his mother". If you let me play armchair psychologist for a bit, it seems like he's trying to recreate the time of his life when he remembers society perceiving him that way.

He said the same thing about May when they first shacked up, I believe the video title was When ur So Obsessed u Marry Your Clone (to be fair, they're both similarly ugly but Digi was able to hide it with a beard). It's no longer much of a stretch to say Conrad will project traits of whatever woman has the most influence over him at the time onto himself. Whether or not he's conscious of this is anyone's guess.

 

[SchizoShoujo]

I guess going by the Japanese titles was too much for Digi. I knew he would cheat, but I didn't think he would do so this early.

Not to be overly pedantic, but technically he is going by the Japanese title. The Japanese titles for the rebuilds all start with "E", such as "Evangelion Shin Gekijouban: Jo" for the first rebuild film. It would be a different story if the video was about the TV series or End of Eva but from what I gathered from his tweets it will be exclusively about the rebuilds.

 

[Bad Take Crucifier]

He said the same thing about May when they first shacked up, I believe the video title was When ur So Obsessed u Marry Your Clone (to be fair, they're both similarly ugly but Digi was able to hide it with a beard). It's no longer much of a stretch to say Conrad will project traits of whatever woman has the most influence over him at the time onto himself. Whether or not he's conscious of this is anyone's guess.

He's skinwalking as the women in his life. He seems to "know" this based on past statements ("I want to escape into women"), but I don't think he understands the implications of how fucked up he is.

 

[believe all women]

Spoiler: One big happy...

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Spoiler: family!

View attachment 2487758

Many such cases.

 

[Lanieras]

Spoiler: One big happy...

View attachment 2487717

If he had dyed his hair red instead, he would be on point for the "Cross-dressing criminal #2 from Powerpuff Girls" look:

 

[enjoy being dead]

I don't get it. The trannypill so potent.

I've come to believe that the trans thing is (at least for some) literally a religious experience.

People who study religion have pointed out that believers tend to either be:
1. Passive members who never really questioned the faith and just roll with it.
2. Former skeptics who had a conversion experience.

The usual trajectory for that second group, who take their faith way more seriously than the first, is that there was some aspect of their life (more often than not, something going on inside their mind) which made it impossible for them to accept reality, forcing them to eventually turn to religion.

The part relevant to the trans thing is that religion helps these people by surrounding what they hate about themselves with a narrative context which makes it less of a problem, or even a good thing. An alcoholic or abuser who "comes to Jesus" learns that humans hurting each other is just part of living in a fallen world, and that his job is not to fix it but believe in Christ. In fact, his sinful nature makes his faith all that much more impressive and deserving of reward. Ironically, this often reduces their stress enough that the bad behavior goes away on its own, which reinforces their faith.

It seems pretty universal to hear MtF trans people talk about a moment where they suddenly realized "oh, it all makes sense now. I was a girl the whole time!" and the memories getting explained are almost never positive. Some were abused, some were abusers, and almost all of them were low-status men who felt defeated by the realities of male competition. Indulging in metaphysics allows them to retroactively turn all those events into misunderstandings and/or victimization from a society which suppresses the truth. It's like they load decades of guilt and shame onto a barge, push it into the water, then set it on fire.

That going trans seems to actually change personality and emotional reactions is what locks this in for me, as you see that with "born again" types as well, which mirrors the language of trans ideology. There are also plenty of parallels in how transition and conversion (the words are almost interchangeable) both attract pre-built social groups who are all committed to a set of non-literal/irrational beliefs, giving everyone involved a huge incentive to never question the logic of what they're saying. Imagine Ben as a catty old lady screaming at at a reporter for daring to question the sincerity of a suspiciously convenient baptism. It fits pretty well, and it's not much harder to think of similar parallels for Gib, Digi, or whomever.

Having a public script for "spontaneous" religious knowledge also has a funny way of making it happen. Buddhists always find the reincarnated Lamas, Native Americans always found their helper spirits, and Puritans generally received their moment of justification where God told them they were one of the chosen. Do some people have these experiences with no prompting? Yes, but the script makes it more common.

Kind of a spiel, but I've been thinking about this for a while and the Digi shit kept brining it back to me.

 

[Amazing Criminal]

Spoiler: One big happy...

View attachment 2487717

Why do all trannies have that exact face