DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell - General Discussion

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Gotta say, I'm a little confused.
Phil got $80 tonight and thanked everyone for a great streaming week. That was only $300 on the day... so we didn't make up for last night being slow. As of mid-stream, this was not a good week.
But... I thought he had to hit all the tips goal to get his groceries tomorrow? Without that $900 how will he do it?

Seriously though, how many times is he going to use this same beg tactic when he could just tell them to pay up. Groceries are a meme for our sake at this point.
 
Gotta say, I'm a little confused.
Phil got $80 tonight and thanked everyone for a great streaming week. That was only $300 on the day... so we didn't make up for last night being slow. As of mid-stream, this was not a good week.
But... I thought he had to hit all the tips goal to get his groceries tomorrow? Without that $900 how will he do it?

Seriously though, how many times is he going to use this same beg tactic when he could just tell them to pay up. Groceries are a meme for our sake at this point.

I don’t think there’s anyone left who believes Phil’s lies. I don’t know if Phil even knows this, it would save him a hell of a lot of effort if he did.

Literally the only people left paying him are willing retards larping as retards and lonely autistic adults.
 
For the brave souls who have actually endured his Hades streams, does he actually ask his chat to pick almost every single ability/item? This is wild. He can’t even make a decision on his own.

Edit: ^^^lol
Yes. And he reads out every choice and item word by word filling as much time as possible, then breaks it down, asks chat, belabors for a minute.
 
Have yet another graph for you guys (sorry):

Average Super Chats (per day).png

As we can see, this latest "streaming week" (09/06/21 to 09/08/21) was Dave's best week ever in terms of average daily Super Chats. He received a total $537.27 in Super Chats. Out of that, $100.73 were flagged by me as Troll Super Chats (i.e. the vast majority of these dipshits ended up being banned immediately after Super Chatting). Out of the total amount of Super Chats received, 18.7% were by trolls.

The funny thing is that a SIGNIFICANT chunk of these troll Super Chats were in a $5 increment. Like I don't get why you wouldn't just Super Chat whatever the minimum is (either 1 dollar or 2 dollars?), then you can do it multiple times for the same amount of money, right? Your message gets deleted immediately after anyways so the longer message duration is irrelevant.

I don't fucking understand these people.
 
He's up "bright and early" at almost 11. Most of us have been up and working for several hours already.
Same, I'm up by 10:30 and at work by 11..pm :( rip social life. Phil has days all to himself to do he pleases. He could wake up early get chores done or something. Or wake up late like he does. Get to his "job" work for a couple hrs then do chores and or go out and meet friends after their 9 to 5 is done. Instead he lays around till my 3rd shift ass is having lunch tweeting then goes to bed. It's a pitiful life to be sure
 
To add some all important KHANTEXT to this moment...
Phil told his audience to stop sending superchats because he desperately needs immediate income (again... $900 for groceries as far as he has told us).
He then insults them for talking about music and not helping him.
He then bans someone for saying they were talking about Drake and not Kanye. That's now bannable because Phil thinks it's 'stupid shit'.

GameTrekker also tipped him $25 for beating Hades again and Phil just said if you liked that be beat Hades again, you should support the stream.
That would be why he's playing the game again - he thinks if he beats Hades now that he has his bow going, he'll get money.

I dont get it, how can you offer money to someone that is constantly negative. He isnt some hot thot to simp over because you are hoping for a shoutout. Phil literally, if you sent him $100 superchat he would say "cool but can you next time make a tip instead?". I would immediately request a chargeback and remove myself from any of his content. I know he is a moron but a moron that still makes 9K a month...
 
Ok, buckle up for a lolcow crossover.

Dsp loves to claim his trolls try to ruin his livelihood or wreck his family, in reality, because he hes set up to be North Korea isolated for the rest of his life in his “office”, dsp has no trolls who legitimately affect his life; the extent of his “trolling” are comments in chat, “troll” super chats, and Jose and Gojitenks sniping him in SF once a week. He may consider the restreamers/clippers to be trolls but let’s be honest, if those disappeared he’d be worse off and it is just compilations of the stupid stuff he says.

Wings trolls, not so much…

Right now wings is the target of a zoomer gay ops that is using a fake Wings account that matches his twitter @ to commented horrible stuff on a bunch of tik told users accounts. Apparently wings was visited by his local police at 3am.

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Whether or not wings is embellishing it doesn’t matter, his trolls are way more intense than Dsp and iirc Dsp has even stated that at some point. Yet when it’s convenient for DSP to complain for pity money, his trolls are suddenly plotting his downfall and want his life ruined.

Anyways, Wings retweeted a thread of users here responding to the fake him on tik tok and they are hilarious. Go watch them and look at the responses to his tweets if you want a good laugh.

I imagine Dsp wouldn’t survive if he had cops showing up at 3am. Imagine that mornings prestream. :lit:
 
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Well Phil managed to get through Tormented Souls yesterday and it was a mix of amusing and dissapointing. The chat unfortunatley handeld him through every single puzzle, I don't think he figured out anything on his own the entire game.

The puzzles themselves aren't overly difficult but they're very easy to overthink. The chash register and puzzle door where you had to match fucking shapes like square and triangle on the key to fit the door were probably the only highlights of DSP's stupidity as chat at least withheld the answer for more than 5 minutes.
 
I don't normally buy into the pigroach luck, but I will say that one lucky element of Phil is his "trolls". Phil's home address/phone number and even gate code have been known for a pretty long time, at least as long as I've followed DSP. The worst that ever happened is someone tried to send him a cardboard dick. And IIRC, they somehow managed to mess that up. Other than that? His trolls mess with him with the genius idea of throwing money at him. Most people with actual trolls have legitimate complaints of harassment, Phil is the only one I can think of that directly gets paid by his.
 
Most people with actual trolls have legitimate complaints of harassment, Phil is the only one I can think of that directly gets paid by his.
Agreed. He says the trolls harass him, say meany words and do fucked up shit, but not a single example is given. And when he has to then he comes up with this cardboard dick moment and maybe some situations he already retconed or has no proof for, or isn't even trolling at all, or just a vague statement of "they do something". When in fact there is nothing are very limited occurences way back then, which is bad for his victim narrative. A victim makes better pity bux. He wants us make look so bad.
 
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Agreed. He says the trolls harass him, say meany words and do fucked up shit, but not a single example is given. And when he has to then he comes up with this cardboard dick moment and maybe some situations he already retconed or has no proof for, or isn't even trolling at all, or just a vague statement of "they do something". When in fact there is nothing, which is bad for his victim narrative. A victim makes better pity bux.


There was the police visit, although that was a welfare check rather than a swatting. But agreed, he has gotten off incredibly lightly, all the other instances he brings up are just people pointing out to him or others what a complete piece of shit he is, and why you shouldn't associate with him.
 
I don't normally buy into the pigroach luck, but I will say that one lucky element of Phil is his "trolls". Phil's home address/phone number and even gate code have been known for a pretty long time, at least as long as I've followed DSP. The worst that ever happened is someone tried to send him a cardboard dick. And IIRC, they somehow managed to mess that up. Other than that? His trolls mess with him with the genius idea of throwing money at him. Most people with actual trolls have legitimate complaints of harassment, Phil is the only one I can think of that directly gets paid by his.
I remember some people were sending him at a point in time business, marketing, furniture, holiday and finance type magazines to not only try and irritate him by filling his mail with just junk, but to also attempt to trigger a reaction from the IRS that "Burnell Enterprises" was not paying the correct amount of taxes under a business name and was committing various criminal offences such as tax evasion. I believe he did actually end up starting that entire back taxes debacle not long after this happened (but it happened a few good years ago and my timing might be off a bit, so I'm not too sure if the timing lines up) so that was probably one of the other few times that being doxed has came to bite him in the ass.

I suppose one way a copycat troll could take this a step further but in a more personal direction would be to send him a bunch of porno and swim suit modelling magazines, if it's to be believed that Kat is indeed still in that house and is working some part time job, she would undoubtedly see them at some point in the house or in the trash and this could potentially open up another whole can of worms about Phil's priorities towards her and if he still holds and interest in other women on the side, that would certainly create some uncomfortable reactions from Phil and I'm not sure how he'd be able to handle the damage control.
 
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There was the police visit, although that was a welfare check rather than a swatting. But agreed, he has gotten off incredibly lightly, all the other instances he brings up are just people pointing out to him or others what a complete piece of shit he is, and why you shouldn't associate with him.
Well tbf to Phil for once there were the copyright strikes of the SoK in 2015 (most of them were anyway) BUT it was Phil's and Machinima's fault (the Machinima part may be a blatant lie because Phil changed the story so many times it makes my head spin) that he deleted videos out of fear of loosing his main channel and thus relegating him to the bottom tier of search results. Of course what he doesn't mention is that he was in a slow decline anyway this episode just hastened his demise. Then we had the DDosing but this should be harmless (and could even be used for pity bucks) Phil really got of lightly unless we have something akin to real threats missing. Not sure where I woulk put King Tut because I am not sure what the end damage was (did Tut win his chargebacks or not?)
 
Even after acknowledging the great super chat activity
he keeps his retards on their toes.
if the motorized retards stopped sending him superchats, the time will come when his jewtube check will be $1k less than usual and he will shit on them for not supporting him enough through jewtube.
on another note:
I have the feeling that jewtube will phase out "alternative supporting" mechanisms for streamers, because a 30 fucking percent cut out of any $ spend on jewtube is 100% profit for jewtube.
Do you remember when jewtube warned you that you are about to leave the website and sent to another one? It didn't happen for years and suddenly they put it on streamlabs link. (I don't know if it's just for the donation sites).
 
To add some all important KHANTEXT to this moment...
Phil told his audience to stop sending superchats because he desperately needs immediate income (again... $900 for groceries as far as he has told us).
He then insults them for talking about music and not helping him.
He then bans someone for saying they were talking about Drake and not Kanye. That's now bannable because Phil thinks it's 'stupid shit'.

GameTrekker also tipped him $25 for beating Hades again and Phil just said if you liked that be beat Hades again, you should support the stream.
That would be why he's playing the game again - he thinks if he beats Hades now that he has his bow going, he'll get money.

Phil telling people to forgo Superchats in lieu of tips because 'that helps me in a month and a half, I need help NOW!', is pretty much the best look into his way of thinking and behaving when it comes to his financial situation and why he's never going to have any actual 'success' or ability to do anything that doesn't involve a lot of sad and shameless begging.

I mean, god forbid he find some way, ANY way, to suffer some short-term pain (of course, even a seemingly minor adjustment that in any way threatens his slavery to his immediate impulses qualifies as 'pain' to him) where he buckles down and makes some kind of sacrifice that will pay off in the long-term. Instead, say fuck doing what will help me then, do what helps me NOW, and then act surprised and frustrated and blame the trolls and Twitch and anybody else that isn't you when in a month and a half you have to ask people that you, once again, need immediate help. Then just do that over and over!

Oh, well, with a 13 year history of doing this that he's so unabashedly proud of behind him, I'm sure he must know what he's doing.
 
Agreed. He says the trolls harass him, say meany words and do fucked up shit, but not a single example is given. And when he has to then he comes up with this cardboard dick moment and maybe some situations he already retconed or has no proof for, or isn't even trolling at all, or just a vague statement of "they do something". When in fact there is nothing are very limited occurences way back then, which is bad for his victim narrative. A victim makes better pity bux. He wants us make look so bad.
I remember right after the vest streak and just before and during the chargeback saga he tried to rile up the paypigs by saying that they should tip him to negate the "behind the scenes trolling activity" going on right at that second. That's how lazy his lies were. Right now DA TROLLZ are nothing more than Phil's version of the Two Minutes of Hate, an imaginary enemy that he uses to remind the paypigs that there's an us vs. them scenario going on.
 
Well that and he also screams at people who happen to be talking about something other than their Lord and Master right when he leans over to "HMMMMMMMMMM" while waiting for someone to spoonfeed him a solution

The dynamic seriously reminds me of the abusive husband you never can please:

Dinner isn’t on the table the minute he comes home? You’re a worthless dumb whore, and here’s a slap or two to beat some of the stupid out of you.

Dinner is on the table the next day, but he’s five minutes late so it’s “getting cold”? You goddamn dumb bitch! He’s been working his ass off all day and gets a cold dinner as thanks? Here’s one right in the kisser!

Likewise there’s ever no pleasing Phil.

Talking and having fun? Well fuck you guys for talking about “stewpid shiat!” and not paying attention. Have some bans!

Chat is silent cause he told them to pipe down everyone is watching Phil’s fascinating gameplay and riveting commentary? Fuck you guys, why aren’t you talking and having fun? Here’s a LIMB to set an example!

It’s almost as if it doesn’t really matter WHAT the chat does, it’s mainly there as a punching bag for Phil to be Big Dick Burnell.

@Pretty Boy Extremism
Phil's version of the Two Minutes of Hate, an imaginary enemy that he uses to remind the paypigs that there's an us vs. them scenario going on.

Kind of ironic if Phil is smart enough to pull that kind of basic manipulation. While at the same time too dumb or delusional to realize that a good 2/3s of his chat are trolls or ironic fans (including mahds!)

@NursezillaX
Oh, well, with a 13 year history of doing this that he's so unabashedly proud of behind him, I'm sure he must know what he's doing.

I find it really hilarious that Phil seems more proud of “being the most prolific uploader of gameplay in Youtube history”. (something any autist on SSID could easily beat him at) Than he is at having whales and retards give him hundreds of thousands of dollars a year, for lord knows how many years now.

(Yes, Phil is a piece of shit, but if it was that easy to wring huge profits out of retards, there’d be more doing it. E-thots not counting!)

It’s like seeing a internet spam king brag about the number of emails he has sent, but not caring about how much money he made on them.
 
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While it is sad piggy is treated with kid's gloves from 'da tractors' we can always look to the silver lining that it gives him less to whine to his wheelchairs about for more of their disability checks.

Although if I lived in Washington, I'd defiantly head to Renton just once on his day off and find him at the mall to simply ask 'Are you that guy?'
 
Seeing dsp’s “bright and early” comment made me think how much I would love if there was a tv show where Phil tried out various “real” jobs, reality show style. Kind of like Dirty Jobs mixed with Cooking with the King.
One week he’d get thrown out the bed at 4 for a 24 hour shift in healthcare, the other working through the night in some warehouse job; he could also do a special boot camp episode. Hell, have him work his dream job at an authentic Italian restaurant. Work like real people. I want to watch him fumble simple directions, I want him at a customer service desk after Black Friday, I want him to do some heavy lifting. He would fuck up every step of the way (hopefully not costing human lives) and complain about literally everything and seeing him interact with coworkers/ customers would be hilarious. By the end of the episode he’d for real cry about how “it’s been tuff u know :’(“ but wouldn’t actually learn anything from the experience long term, because he’s an irredeemable human being. It would still be funny though. Netflix execs, pick this idea up along with the Chris Chan biopic, sound good?
 
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