4/6/2016 Forgetting how much everyone there hates him, Phil autistically plans to return to Portland

The entitlement... Just... just wow.

Like most self-centered, egotistical cock stains with delusions of grandeur who have absolutely nothing of value to offer anyone, Phil thinks very highly of himself, feeling superior to everyone around him, and truly believes that society owes him a comfortable life, luxuries, and anything else his little brain says he deserves for simply for existing and being "special".
 
And so the lesser spotted rolling potato begins its migration north once more; travelling the west coast upwards before eventually settling in the pleasant forests and lakes of Oregon for the summer. It will be a journey fraught with danger, not least from the tuber's natural predator - the Kiwi; but the payoff will be more than worth it. *Shot of Phil gourging on cheese out of a dumpster in Portland*
 
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Okay here's a fun little fact; even if Phil did get his spuds removed (and lets be realistic here) going in for a vaginoplasty constitutes as cosmetic surgery which in generally not covered under most medical insurances. Not only that but it constitutes as a sex change which means Philthy has to go in and get a psychological background check first. And Null was right; the pseudo 'gina is a wound that the body constantly tries to close...given Phil's horrendous hygiene any surgeon worth their salt won't go through with it given that Phil would be back in two weeks later with sepsis and gangrene from an open wound infection.
 
It's still amazing how a white non-Hispanic man(child) with a mostly shaved head can be so delusional that he insists he's a "Herspanic Baddie"* and that anyone reacting to his toxic nature with anything other than asspats is guilty of various tumblrisms for discrimination.

'war for orchiectomy?'
Phil thinks his entire life of angry bouncing and squeaking is a brave fight against the "transmisogynistic" status quo.

*(even a road sign that reads "PHIL NO ES HISPANO" probably wouldn't convince him otherwise)
 
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inb4 this all turns out to be a "red herring" like taterboi's story about his return to Philadelphia
He probably was actually considering it, until he backed out of it after KF started talking about the thread.
 
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