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Oh my god guys I've figured it out!
So notice how Chris put some sort of mystical third eye on his forehead, you remember how in today's video he put his forehead up to the camera?
This is what Chris actually believes:
d7159ef1309ee55eb8023267c61a19e6.png


It's almost as if he's cursing us or something right?
Guys this is the modern day version of the Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha! Classic Chris is back in full swing!
 
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Silver Octopus said:
Oh my god guys I've figured it out!
So notice how Chris put some sort of mystical third eye on his forehead, you remember how in today's video he put his forehead up to the screen?
This is what Chris actually believes:
d7159ef1309ee55eb8023267c61a19e6.png


It's almost as if he's cursing us or something right?
Guys this is the modern day version of the Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha! Classic Chris is back in full swing!
Click to expand...
Remember, Chris wants kids! Imagine a baby having to look at that in their crib every single morning.
 
Hollywood Hulk Hogan said:
Like I said, she's not ugly and I would not reject her, but there's far better looking women out in public pretty much everywhere
Click to expand...

She has everything else he wants, though. She's a more or less liked artist who is reasonably talented, and I doubt the fact that she draws porn that he faps to costs her any points, either.
 
The Great Chandler said:
It's only because she's blonde and not fat in their case isn't?
Click to expand...

Probably. To Chris's credit I don't think he only liked her because of her appearance. She's in a stupid show Chris is obssessed with, he likes her voice, her online personality and her artwork. And she also draws porn.
But yeah, I think he still wouldn't have given her this much attention and money if she was ugly or fat.
 
Between the actions of Doopie and Chris my faith in humanity and Christory is restored. Odds are though this time next week he will barely remember ever interacting with her and she'll be just another of many silent waifu he fawns over.
 
Silver Octopus said:
Guys this is the modern day version of the Curse-Ye-Ha-Me-Ha! Classic Chris is back in full swing!
Click to expand...

So what you're saying is he can't even muster the energy to do an air kamehameha and has to pretend a badly-drawn mystical eye on his expanding forehead is doing it for him?

You're on to something...
 
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Tonberry said:
Probably. To Chris's credit I don't think he only liked her because of her appearance. She's in a stupid show Chris is obssessed with, he likes her voice, her online personality and her artwork. And she also draws furry porn.
But yeah, I think he still wouldn't have given her this much attention and money if she was ugly or fat.
Click to expand...

Chris standards for physical beauty are limited to "white". I guarantee you he'd thirst after her even if she was conventionally ugly solely because she's a quirky internet girl who's into the same stuff he's into. Chris, like most neckbeards, has virtually no standards beyond wanting a pair of boobs to grab.

He wasn't interested in Jackie because she was a hot red head. He was interested in her because she was a girl who talked to him.
 
Replicant Sasquatch said:
Chris standards for physical beauty are limited to "white". I guarantee you he'd thirst after her even if she was conventionally ugly solely because she's a quirky internet girl who's into the same stuff he's into. Chris, like most neckbeards, has virtually no standards beyond wanting a pair of boobs to grab.

He wasn't interested in Jackie because she was a hot red head. He was interested in her because she was a girl who talked to him.
Click to expand...
Chris' obsession triggers must be much more sensitive because Doopie was barely nice to him.
 
Buck Mullet said:
Between the actions of Doopie and Chris my faith in humanity and Christory is restored. Odds are though this time next week he will barely remember ever interacting with her and she'll be just another of many silent waifu he fawns over.
Click to expand...

Oh no this is going to turn into JOOOLAY 2: Electric Hedgehog Boogaloo
 
I remain skeptical of an actual Doopie Saga. "Saga" refers to prolonged events in Chris's life where his entire existence focuses around a specific trope or person. Julie was a saga. Liquid Chris was a saga. Tomgirl is a saga. Right now, Doopie is just an artcow caught in Chris's crossfire. If she starts exploiting him for nudes or some shit then we can say we've reached a saga.

MMX said:
That didn't disqualify Vanessa Hudgens or certain versions of blanca
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I think what it comes down to is Chris just doesn't find dark-skinned women attractive. He had no problem with Emily, who was Asian.
 
All things considered this was a pretty short "saga". The amount of time taken to go from nothing to cringe to antics means we could easily get a rate of up to 12 irritated internet girls/year

FierceBrosnan said:
Oh no this is going to turn into JOOOLAY 2: Electric Hedgehog Boogaloo
Click to expand...

:julay: 2: Electric Doopieloo
 
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