"ADF" / Philip Vincent Haskins-Delici / Isabel Rosa Araujo - The Original Troon Commie Cow

[BlueArmedDevil]

So now he's a disabled, trans, satanist, antifa communist? How many labels will he have by next year?

The real question is how many of them will get tattooed.

 

[The Dude]

Did Phil really get his quadruple chins tattooed? He really does want to look like the most ridiculous moron possible. And I've got news for Phil: just because he edits a censorship bar over his Fetal Alcohol eyes, doesn't mean they're not there. Everyone has seen his re-tard eyes and everyone knows they're there, giving away his true self. No amount of image graphics and photoshop will change that.

 

[Tragi-Chan]

And I've got news for Phil: just because he edits a censorship bar over his Fetal Alcohol eyes, doesn't mean they're not there. Everyone has seen his re-tard eyes and everyone knows they're there, giving away his true self. No amount of image graphics and photoshop will change that.

At this stage I feel like, why post selfies at all? He’s embarrassed about his rat teeth, wattle, pig nose, derp eyes and general obesity. He lays so much crap on top of his images that you can barely even tell it’s a human.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

At this stage I feel like, why post selfies at all? He’s embarrassed about his rat teeth, wattle, pig nose, derp eyes and general obesity. He lays so much crap on top of his images that you can barely even tell it’s a human.

It's because Taters has a need to be seen and a need for people to know it's him. He will hide his eyes and face because of the derp but will still post under his normal account because he needs this kind of attention.

For all he complains about the Orchards we're the only people that actually watch him. Not Antifa. Not the Satanists. Not the communists. Not anybody else. It's just us. But he doesn't want to be an image of ridicule so he's removed everything that we can make fun of. His eyes? Cover them up. His mouth? Don't show it. Just put Ave Satanas there because he thinks it sounds more badass than "hail Satan".

In short it's just another thing he can larp as.

 

[Sonichu-choo trainwreck]

Here you go. The rest of the thread is here.
View attachment 2642900

That's Phil's Sorel* boot combat handler from red guard in bloc days (last year) - so yeah "I was there"
they never bring up that a dude was approaching the guy Phil maced and the mace victim** was fending that guy off

The Sorel special-needs forces commander did get it HALF right. Phil's not a socio-political threat, he's just a safety hazard like a toddler running with scissors is.


*No offense to sorels,I have a pair! cozy for snow shoveling, after skiing, etc...they are soft sorta galoshes though so don't let anyone step on your feet!
super comfy though

**I think there was more than one victim, like his budy there got some overspray too.


PHIL, PLEASE GET BACK TO MAKING POTATO STABBING VIDEOS, ETC
Maybe AustraLatinx (they recently had a referrendum to be more NB inclusive with the name) can be the home of the Nacitav (the backwards Satanic Vatican)..you could be head of he Piss Guard..the Satanic version of the Swiss Guard.
When the cheese on an overcooked tombstone (oooh, so dark) starts smoking, you've elected a new anti-pope.

We just need a little more man now that Chris is having his...parent troubles

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

Did Phil really get his quadruple chins tattooed?

I wouldn't put it past spuds to go full on venom style demon maw on his jaw and face.

 

[JY's Tampon]

That's Phil's Sorel* boot combat handler from red guard in bloc days (last year) - so yeah "I was there"
they never bring up that a dude was approaching the guy Phil maced and the mace victim** was fending that guy off

The Sorel special-needs forces commander did get it HALF right. Phil's not a socio-political threat, he's just a safety hazard like a toddler running with scissors is.


*No offense to sorels,I have a pair! cozy for snow shoveling, after skiing, etc...they are soft sorta galoshes though so don't let anyone step on your feet!
super comfy though

**I think there was more than one victim, like his budy there got some overspray too.

The funny thing is that the handler wasn't even local. Probably because Phil is a known liability to the locals and he has to latch onto unsuspecting outsiders. She was from Washington state by way of Alabama which would account for the overkill on the winter boots.

 

[the khat quaffer]

The reason we all discovered ADF way back when was he drew a picture of Sasuke from Naruto shooting McCain in the head. I actually thought it was a joke at the time.

His involvement with Chris was Chris was fed false info that Jack Thaddeus/CrassCrab was actually ADF. ADF ran with it to critique Chris a bunch. Well then Bob died and that operation of setting up a lolcow war failed. Fatman and ADF were the only ones to respond anyway. Everyone else Chris was fed false info about either didn’t care or ignored it.

Ugh, way to rip open old wounds. I miss that version of Chris, not this horrifying, pale imitation we've had to suffer for the last 5 years.

Imagine your only real claim to fame in life being confused for a minor troll of the worthless Chris-chan.

"Is cwcville under martial law?!" - Jack Thaddeus

 

[The Dude]

I wouldn't put it past spuds to go full on venom style demon maw on his jaw and face.

Except Phil will insist on being the one to draw the master image himself, just like all his other tard scribble tattoos, so it'll come out looking like awful clown makeup instead of a symbiotic alien creature. Phil has always insisted on being the "artist" responsible for the images of all his tattoos, which is why he looks like some SpEd class' rainy day arts and crafts project.

 

[AnOminous]

And having trench foot, having bad spanglish tattoos, not knowing how to ride a bike...

I think possibly the funniest Phil Phailure is getting a tattoo of a bike on him while being literally too retarded even to ride one.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

I think possibly the funniest Phil Phailure is getting a tattoo of a bike on him while being literally too exceptional even to ride one.

It was the whole fascination with bikes like they stuck it to the patriarchy or something that made no sense. But I guess that's part of his autism like the thing with road signs and designing his own country.

 

[Adamska]

It was the whole fascination with bikes like they stuck it to the patriarchy or something that made no sense. But I guess that's part of his autism like the thing with road signs and designing his own country.

I half suspect that besides just getting autistically fascinated because of some lesbian bike group, he came up with it because in reality his failure to be able to drive really broke him. He never could flap his hands and squak when he sees a light change color when he is in the driving wheel. He could never pass someone over a dotted yellow line.

Not being able to drive a fedora on wheels and indulge the roadsign autism within probably broke him. So he tried to use bikes to replace it... only to figure out he's too clumsy and smoothbrained to use them too.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

I half suspect that besides just getting autistically fascinated because of some lesbian bike group, he came up with it because in reality his failure to be able to drive really broke him. He never could flap his hands and squak when he sees a light change color when he is in the driving wheel. He could never pass someone over a dotted yellow line.

Could be. I remember in one of his bitmoji strips he loved to make for a while he'd call cars "fedoras on wheels" and would show himself, dressed as a witch, gliding by on a bike while drinking some girly froo-froo drink.

But you just know that if Taters could drive and had a car he'd be taking it everywhere just because he could and laughing at everybody that was walking.

 

[Alex Krycek]

Could be. I remember in one of his bitmoji strips he loved to make for a while he'd call cars "fedoras on wheels" and would show himself, dressed as a witch, gliding by on a bike while drinking some girly froo-froo drink.

But you just know that if Taters could drive and had a car he'd be taking it everywhere just because he could and laughing at everybody that was walking.

He called them “Four Wheeled Fedoras” because some Leftist Lesbians in Seattle were doing it to make fun of how men were so fragile that they had to take cars everywhere. I really miss the Bitstrips days because the edits were so fucking amazing. There was one where his character was some Black Chick with a pink Mohawk that said “White people you just don’t get it do you?” Above whatever SocJus stuff he was on about in the speech bubble. Null edited her speech bubble to just be a bucket of KFC with the “White people you just don’t get it” intact.

 

[Ophelia]

He named a bike and called it his daughter.
Which he wanted to ride.

 

[obliviousbeard]

I absolutely love the bikes with Phil. One of the reasons he glommed on to them was due to his autistic weeaboo phase. He saw the chinese character riding a bike. So of course bikes were tied to chink communism in his mind. And when he later on turned whatever commie freak he was supposed to be, it became a part of his identity.
Tattoos of bikes, all sorts of cycling gear including helmets and bike locks. Without owning a bike. Then he found out some feminist cycling collective, and of course bikes were against patriarchy too - that's how he got the clitoral dough tattoo on his pigskin.
Shows complete and utter lack of his theory of mind and how he's just sponge for different influences. It all makes sense to him, so of course must be clear to others. Also I think he had fantasies (and possibly tattoos) of feminists beating up pudgy men (like him) with bike locks. Fucking bike locks man.
So yeah, of course when he got some second hand bike, he didn't have issues with riding before he tried it. Of course his balls were apparently on the way? So the bike just ended up as living room decoration, after he had gotten all sorts of lights and panniers on it. For a bike that was never even ridden.

He named a bike and called it his daughter.
Which he wanted to ride.

And never learned how.

 

[fuckidunno]

Velo Phil is my favorite Phil

 

[AnOminous]

Velo Phil is my favorite Phil

My favorite was Bondage Walrus, back before he became so ashamed of his mongoloid facial features that he started hiding them.

The sheer stupidity of his face never fails to make me chuckle.

 

[obliviousbeard]

My favorite was Bondage Walrus, back before he became so ashamed of his mongoloid facial features that he started hiding them.
View attachment 2668686
The sheer stupidity of his face never fails to make me chuckle.

I know this has been beaten to all hell and back, but I still can't get over it. Imagine working for sex shop that deals with this kinda stuff. Cages, whips, leather products etc. You're just there to pay your bills, selling occasional vibrator there, handcuffs here and maybe packing up some bigger order to be delivered to someone. And the next thing you know out when you come out of the backroom is Phil wandering in the aisles with his handler. Bouncing, squeaking and doing all kinds of tard stuff and maybe trying to chat with other clients and you're there just thinking if he does even understand birds and bees, and what this stuff is used for.

 

[AnOminous]

Bouncing, squeaking and doing all kinds of tard stuff and maybe trying to chat with other clients and you're there just thinking if he does even understand birds and bees, and what this stuff is used for.

All indications are he doesn't, and was just using that tard gear as a more gross form of a hugbox. His understanding of sex is probably on a really dumb, autistic level.