Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

[low sodium]

I quit keto.... & about the tiktok I posted | weigh in days 4-5 | vlog​

Nov 15, 2022

497.8


Archive

Spoiler: Archive

 

[Mesh Gear Fox]

God damn she ate that whole carton of cookies.

 

[Lack of a better nickname]

Ah, yes, the magical cookies who cause a 10/15 ellbees gain

 

[w4vy_gr4vy]

What part of the cycle are we in now? I'd say the belligerent and aggressive to her audience phase but she's always belligerent and aggressive to her audience these days so it's hard to keep track.

Get that new high score for your birthday, gorl! You can do it!!

 

[I call shenanigans]

God damn she ate that whole carton of cookies.

Ah, yes, the magical cookies who cause a 10/15 ellbees gain

No big deal....it's only 12 servings. Intuitive eating and portion control is sure to work this time if she journals her feelings.

What part of the cycle are we in now?

The death spiral with any luck.

 

[Thumb Butler]

God damn she ate that whole carton of cookies.

Chips ahoy, open binge hole wide!

 

[Clown Baby]

So let me get this straight: keto doesn't work for her because she purchased and ate a whole package of cookies, which aren't keto and shouldn't have been in her house while she was doing keto. Her doctor thinks she needs to be on keto because of having lipodema, but her therapist thinks she shouldn't be restricting her food at all (sure, jan). She's quitting keto because it "made her" binge and somehow made her gallbladder have "sludge" in it, so she is what, going back to just eating whatever she wants? I'm sure that will be great for her gallbladder.

People like Amber need inpatient treatment. She needs to be in a facility where they bring her portioned food and rely on mindfulness practices to manage distress surrounding not-getting-my-way 24/7. Basically she needs to be treated like a toddler and have her tantrums about I WANNA COOKIE REEEE ignored by well-meaning professionals. I do think that if she went into a hospital she would end up bed bound like Fat Jen, and even though it's what she needs to succeed at weight loss, it would ultimately be the beginning of the end. Look up lost cause in the dictionary and you will find a filtered selfie of Amber eye-fucking herself fatly.

 

[w4vy_gr4vy]

Maybe I'm autistic but didn't she also say Ozempic gave her some sludge related problem and that's why she had to stop that too or am I just getting her lahs mixed up?

 

[dfranki723]

I see so many comments about her multitude of doctors not communicating due to ALR's own negligence, however, I am more inclined to believe 90% of these doctors do not fucking exist.
The ones that do are rarely seen and listened to.

 

[Turd Fergusson]

I see so many comments about her multitude of doctors not communicating due to ALR's own negligence, however, I am more inclined to believe 90% of these doctors do not fucking exist.
The ones that do are rarely seen and listened to.

I think Amber sees a lot of doctors and therapists “once”. Amber said in the past that she wants doctors and therapists that she could “ vibe” with them, whatever it means. In reality, she does not want to be told to lose weight and to stop eating that much. This is why she like her haes therapist that tell her that she does not need to lose weight. As far as the lipoedema specialist, she went to see her once, had a treatment that she claim was painful, and likely is not going to see much more.

 

[Constellationzero]

So let me get this straight: keto doesn't work for her because she purchased and ate a whole package of cookies, which aren't keto and shouldn't have been in her house while she was doing keto. Her doctor thinks she needs to be on keto because of having lipodema, but her therapist thinks she shouldn't be restricting her food at all (sure, jan). She's quitting keto because it "made her" binge and somehow made her gallbladder have "sludge" in it, so she is what, going back to just eating whatever she wants? I'm sure that will be great for her gallbladder.

People like Amber need inpatient treatment. She needs to be in a facility where they bring her portioned food and rely on mindfulness practices to manage distress surrounding not-getting-my-way 24/7. Basically she needs to be treated like a toddler and have her tantrums about I WANNA COOKIE REEEE ignored by well-meaning professionals. I do think that if she went into a hospital she would end up bed bound like Fat Jen, and even though it's what she needs to succeed at weight loss, it would ultimately be the beginning of the end. Look up lost cause in the dictionary and you will find a filtered selfie of Amber eye-fucking herself fatly.

The fuck is inpatient gonna really do??

Watch the old Brookhaven doc on Youtube. The head doctor there even acknowledges these boom booms use prison kites and phone in delivery all the time. When asked why he and the staff doesn't slap donuts out of their hands, he said that it was because they wouldn't LEARN ANYTHING otherwise.

Hambutt is on the Jen path already. She is light years beyond meaningful help.

 

[Clown Baby]

Maybe I'm autistic but didn't she also say Ozempic gave her some sludge related problem and that's why she had to stop that too or am I just getting her lahs mixed up?

No you know what, I clean forgot that she claimed a few days ago that Ozempic made her have gallbladder sludge, because now she's saying keto is similarly unhulthy for her insides and mentals, even though it is the number one recommended diet plan for anyone who is obese, has PCOS, has diabetes or prediabetes, and/or has Lipo-Lymphedema. All the excuses she has made for why she can't follow any plan that is sub 4000 calories a day just kind of blend together to me.

 

[reinhold]

Gallstones are a frequent side effect of fast weight loss (which represents an entirely reasonable rate of loss for someone Amber's size), no matter what the diet or method. Ozempic could cause it. Keto could cause it. Simple calorie restriction could cause it. It doesn't matter how you're losing weight, gallstones are just a thing that could happen while you're doing it. I can imagine that Al is in a tougher spot than some since her weight could make surgeons less enthusiastic about performing surgery to remove her gall bladder, but that doesn't remove the absolute priority of losing as much weight as fucking possible, because bitch it's going to kill you. Gall stone attacks fucking suck, but they're rarely lethal. And hey, if she gets a bad one, that might be the impetus needed to get that surgery despite her size. Then it won't be a fucking issue anymore.

To be clear, though: none of this matters. Amberlynn has landed upon a constellation of excuses that each neatly negate the others' solutions, and hooray! Now she doesn't have to diet at all anymore, because no matter what she does, she'll be disobeying one doctor or another. And she takes her health super seriously now, y'all, so she can't disobey her doctors! Except when she plows through an entire package of Chips Ahoy. Or five pints of keto-adjacent ice cream. Or whatever it is she's eating today that we'll hear about this weekend.

Amber's whole deal is overcomplicating weight loss to the point that she just can't possibly do it and it's not her fault, you guys.

 

[Insulin reid]

I think Amber sees a lot of doctors and therapists “once”. Amber said in the past that she wants doctors and therapists that she could “ vibe” with them, whatever it means. In reality, she does not want to be told to lose weight and to stop eating that much. This is why she like her haes therapist that tell her that she does not need to lose weight. As far as the lipoedema specialist, she went to see her once, had a treatment that she claim was painful, and likely is not going to see much more.

She just seeks out professionals who will enable her overeating and just treat her health problems that come with her constant overeating and laziness. Its just basic addict behavior. She did come close this time getting down to what, 465 or something before she freaked out and shoved food in her face to fatten herself up?

Also the lipo specialist is pricey and since its not dainty or cute and she can have wipey massage her giant self its not gonna happen again. Its apparently not "painful" when an untrained gf does it for her.

Shes running out of doctors and specialists to see in her area here too so shes gonna have to leave soon because its only a matter of time till she doctor shops herself out of the area and thats like 50% of her content on her channel. "New doctor, new diet, new me"
Isnt her lease up right now or something? She keeps talking about moving and i think she should focus on that to keep her channel somewhat relevant and bring some new content instead of a diet shes already tried for the millionth time.
If she doesnt have the money to move, renews the lease and stays another year with wipey and just keeps up with the "new diet, holidays, medical scares, new me, journaleen" bullshit she wont be able to afford her luxury apartment no matter how many jobs wipey picks up. Disability arc is imminent if she doesnt gtfo. People are tired and amber would rather die than get off her ass and get to work in a real job.

 

[I call shenanigans]

now she's saying keto is similarly unhulthy for her insides and mentals, even though it is the number one recommended diet plan for anyone who is obese, has PCOS, has diabetes or prediabetes, and/or has Lipo-Lymphedema.

It really isn't "the number one recommended diet plan for anyone" unless you follow a few highly subscribed to medical doctors. Keto is very high fat, medium protien, and very low carb. Most drs and dieticians still demonise fat, and most do not believe in cutting out an entire macro-nutrient (in the case of keto it's carbohydrates that are demonised). It's a tough diet where an already unhealthy gall bladder (and kidneys) is involved. Regardless of what you personally believe should be true, recommended diabetic diets are still very high carbohydrate, often 6 x 30g (minimum) serves /day as well as very low fat. While I don't subscribe to currently recommended....by every major national diabetes association including UK, Australia, New Zealand, and I believe even US that I've recently looked into....high carbohydrate diets, I also wouldn't recommend the very high fat keto diet for most people despite having used a modified version of it myself for many years. It's a very hard diet to sustain consistently in the long term (I'm talking more than a year or so). A diet that prioritises protien, with moderate fats, and low carbs, is much more sustainable for most people...and doesn't allow for four family packets of porkrinds in as many days. In other words...think Mediterranean diet.

Honestly, ALR picks the worst aspects of any diet plan to hang her hat on and then use as her excuse to stop.

 

[FatalTater]

I know we live in Clown World in a shitty timeline, but any doctor that would look at a 5'3" tall 400+lb patient and tell her to stop doing the thing that's helping her lose weight should be investigated, maybe even lose their license.

Amber should stop making doctors look bad and just admit she likes being fat and overindulging in rich food. It's not like anyone believes otherwise.

 

[Constellationzero]

Amber should just admit the following:

* Losing ANY weight puts her at GRAVE risk of independence and having to get a job.
* She'd have to wipe her own ass.
* She'd have to learn to drive and get a license.
* Which would remove any excuse for not getting a job.
* People would put expectations on her.
* No welfare, but also
* No Youtube buxx because No1curr about her jurrrneyy--just the actual results.

 

[Boolean Bitch]

When we last checked in, Keto Queen (snide-mannered Amberlynn Reid) was attempting a gaslighting psyop against the Villianous SCUM organization 'Haydur Nation'. These BRILLIANT tactics included implying that she has atypical and magical resilience to obesity-related medical issues, as well as throwing around altered definitions of "rapid weightloss". She informed the IGNORANT, ABUSIVE haydurs that losing 106 lbs in 'a year' resulted in 2lbs weight loss per week and a sludgy gallbladder. She announced that she planned to correct this RAPID, DANGEROUS, RECKLESS weight loss with a slower and more controlled weight loss of 40 lbs in 100 DAYS (2.8lbs per week). And now for the next episode: "I quit keto.... & about the tiktok I posted | weigh in days 4-5 | vlog" (alternate title: It's not my fault: the sequel)

Spoiler: I quit keto.... & about the tiktok I posted | weigh in days 4-5 | vlog

-- NOVEMBER 6 2022 --

"Hey Guize..." Hmm... 'Hey Guize", poop bun, and that classic sheen... HEY, AMBER'S BACK! YO, AmBO! Don't do the WilLo Davis intro anymore, mmmkay?

RARITY!!! No squeak. 8/10. Oh! Successfully scales Mount Amber after sticking her kitty rear into Ambo's face. 10/10!

COOKIE MOLMENT!! Amber ate an entire Chips Ahoy Cookie package over a 6 hour period. Well, not the ENTIRE PACKAGE, she left the foil and plastic, showing *some* restraint. She just ate all of the cookies. And before you haydurs start up about her eating '12 portions', just STOP! It's obvious that you weren't a student of the prestigious Brown Mackie College like Amber, and didn't take their 'Introduction to Mathematics' course. Amber is 4 times the size of the average 5'3" girl, so that OBVIOUSLY means that she only had 3 servings. Anyone can lose track and eat 3 servings of cookies. And 'portions' are fatphobic and a symbol of our mysogynistic patriarchy anyway, so GO GROW A SYMPATHY BONE!...

... OH, she actually isn't taking the story in that direction. Oops, um... nevermind.

She's babbling here - I'll try to translate: She's afraid that she's tried nothing, and is all out of options on how to proceed. All of her medicines, therapy, journaleen, and eggspurt laygoes aren't magically fixing it on their own, so therefore she doesn't think she can be cured.

After a week of keto, Amber started feeling sick with gallbladder pain, but didn't tell us that in the Halloween livestream (LYING TO US, telling us how well it was working for her - or currently lying about the gallbladder pain). It's the lipedema specialists fault for Amber's gallbladder issues, as Amber knew better than to do keto. Amber claims that the lipedema specialist told Amber she needed to eat about 50g of carbs per day (conversion: 200 calories), and over 200g of fat per day (conversion: 1800 calories). Amber's Duper's delight smile returns when talking about this. Amber acknowledges that her previous diet wasn't low-fat, but because it didn't have steak and pork rinds, Amber knew more about nutrition than the specialist. I'd bet money the specialist didn't tell Amber to eat pork rinds, but whatevs.

POOP TALK - greasy shits. If this is true (and out of the ordinary for Amber), I wouldn't be surprised if her gorging on keto ice cream and it's fake sugar is what caused this. I mean, if a 20 piece chicken McNugget, large fries, McDouble, and large Oreo McFlurry doesn't give her greasy shits, a clean keto diet probably wouldn't either.

Amber wants the audience to ignore that she's Amberlynn Reid when she tells us what she's about to say, because her audience hates on her. Oh FUCK ME, she's indirectly blaming the death of Aaron Carter on her RELAPSE. OHNONONONO [SKIP]

3 medical profressionals - well, 2 professionals and a HAES grifter - are all telling her different things to eat (and the grifter says NO DIETING). Yes, everyone is telling you something different, because you are triangulating them against each other with your lies by omission to them. If the 2 real doctors had the FULL story of this fuckery you're weaving, they'd be recommending that you become a ward of the state, as you are showing the inability to care for yourself in the capacity of an adult. Amber claims she can't get gallbladder removal surgery because her gallbladder isn't infected. Amber doesn't blame herself for the current state of affairs because she's currently doing what the doctors tell her to.

We're just going in circles here, we are back to the 'out of options' nonsense. I never thought I'd say this, but I'd take the Toy Mini Brands unboxings over this.

Amber asks her audience for advice. She also asks us why we are upset when a DOCTOR is telling her to quit keto. I can answer both with one response: NO ONE CARES! Amber plans to log her food, but not count calories, taking the advice of the HAES grifter over the specialists. INTUITIVE EATING IS BACK, but with a variant of 'eat less; move more'. In other words: the same thing she does EVERY TIME she quits a diet. It's an amazing coincidence that she ordered that giant planner to arrive for the beginning of November that has the perfect pages to record all of this! I mean, it took a MONTH to plan it all out and choose a cover. What luck and perfect timing!!

SCALE SCREEN!!! 497.4 lbs (500 lbs)

UNBOXING!!! Toy Mini Brands (The monologue is over! Praise be to the Intergalactic Spaghetti Monster!). 'Skeleton molment' from Dino Island, Blues Clues puzzle, Sewing kit, Ninja Turtle Bop Bag, duplicate Vtech Kiddie Zoom Camera.

-- NOVEMBER 7 2022 --

"Hello Hello". WilLo Davis greeting is back She shows us her mini posterboard doodles, and claims that she used to get paid by people to make them. *SMACK* Take that, Becky! "So therapeutic".

No scale screen: 497.8 lbs (500 lbs). Second binge, resulting in two days in a row of binging. So.. not so therapeutic then? Blames keto (which she isn't doing anymore).

BINGED AGAIN!! 3 binges! Heartburn (must be her water brash and improperly ph balanced water again). Amber doesn't know what's going on. She blames keto (again). Amber mentiones that the haydurs warned her that the ice cream would lead to binging, but they were WRONG! This was because of where she is in her "eating disorder journey". "I'm not addicted to ice cream. Ice cream triggers me just as much as broccoli". If everything triggers you, then why is keto to blame? If everything makes you binge, why have we never heard of your broccoli, green bean, or apple binges? She's back to DoorDash for every meal (but still binging?) So, how can restriction be the cause of your binging when allowing yourself to eat as much of whatever you want is STILL resulting in binges? Amber says she had the cookies to binge on becuase she bought them. So, if you are planning to binge, buying the food, and stuffing it into your face, how are laygoes and scratch art supposed to fix that? This section is all excuses, circular logic, and (greasy, sludgy) bullshit.

Amber pulled this exact same shit during November 2021. Ja'Phonie must be currently packing for her trip to see her family without Amber. The Keto-Qween-turned-Carbie-Gorl is pulling out ALL the stops to convince her to stay. ER visit when?

-- I HATE FOOD --

Amber specifies that she's not doing well mentally IN THE FOOD CATEGORY. She's doing great with EVERYTHING ELSE in her life, and food is the ONLY problem. Struggleen. The psychologist will be MIA for a few months, because she just had a baby, so now Amber doesn't have her therapeutic therapy anymore. This word vomit is therapeutic because Amber KNOWS you are listening to her (AKA: narc thought fuel). Yes, she doesn't want HELP, she wants ATTENTION. Amber inadvertently admits that her 'therapies' are actually hobbies and distractions.

AMBERISM OF THE DAY: "I don't want to burden people in my life ... I don't believe that I'm a burden to the people in my life". HAHAHAHAHA!! Holy shit, that brought this vlog back from the brink!

She's upset about the backlash she got for the TikTok relapse video, but writes it off, as she get backlash for everything she does, and it's because she's fat. Amber admits to watching the eating disorder side of TikTok (inadvertently admitting to getting inspired by this for content). She's sad that the audience thought it was trolling. Amber wasn't trolling: she was trying to depict her struggles in that video. Yes, you were FAKE CRYING ON CAMERA FOR ATTENTION. WE KNOW! Oh, her binging isn't keto's fault anymore! Amber admits to watching a channel that does 'Binge with Me' videos - and THEY have binge eating disorder and are allowed to do this! Ooh, she's bitter that she had to pull her video for being caught violating TOS. And you know, for someone who complains about even green beans triggering her, she sure does go out of her way to surround herself food content. Amber drops Chantal's name again, and mentions "Amy's life journey".

-- THANKS FOR WATCHING *KISSY LIPS* --

TL;DR: RARITY!! Binging and greasy shits. Unboxing. Amber's current health state isn't her fault because she is CURRENTLY listening to doctors. Amber's CURRENTLY not listening to doctors in order to do intuitive eating. Amber almost getting the ban-hammer on TikTok for glorifying eating disorders is fatphobic. Hi, "Amy's Life Journey"!

Has Amber truly given up pork rinds? Will intuitive eating work for her? Does Amber transform and emerge from her Keto Crysallis, and spread her (bingo) wings as a magnificently Cantankerous- I mean, Captivating Carbie Gorl? To find the answers, tune in next time: Same FAT time! Same FAT channel!

 

[Bitch I eat people]

I really want her to be more interesting. Do a goofy cat series, video her Godzilla destroying her expurt legohs or something!
But no, more HAES whinging and stuffing herself full of cookies.

 

[Boolean Bitch]

What part of the cycle are we in now? I'd say the belligerent and aggressive to her audience phase but she's always belligerent and aggressive to her audience these days so it's hard to keep track.

Get that new high score for your birthday, gorl! You can do it!!

I think this is the beginning of the 3rd stage. She's abandoned her diet to do 'what works for her' (no diet) and we are on the brink of vlogmas (which is 25 days of shopping, hauls, tat, and eating shitty food). Her views are drastically down and more people than ever are calling her out on her shit, which explains why the aggressiveness, pity ploys, and belligerance is now present in all stages.

The death spiral with any luck.

Oh, for sure. The only thing that could possibly save Amber's body at this point is a complete brain transplant. She has spent so many years building these lies to protect her addiction, that her subconscious programming is fully set and virtually unchangable. Her 'rock bottom' will be when she posthumously causes a crematorium explosion and uncontrolled fire that ends up leveling a large chunk of town.

The fuck is inpatient gonna really do??

Watch the old Brookhaven doc on Youtube. The head doctor there even acknowledges these boom booms use prison kites and phone in delivery all the time. When asked why he and the staff doesn't slap donuts out of their hands, he said that it was because they wouldn't LEARN ANYTHING otherwise.

Hambutt is on the Jen path already. She is light years beyond meaningful help.

YES! So many (on Youtube and Reddit before the purge), talk about her NEEDING inpatient, yet seem to not be aware of the number of addicts who are just too far gone and go in and out of 12 step programs and inpatient facilities as if they were caught in a revolving door. If Amber were a junkie instead of a 'food addict', she'd be the type who would say whatever needed to be said in the facility to convince them that she was better (if she couldn't first sign herself out AMA). By evening/night, she'd be found in an alley with the needle still in her arm. Medics would successfully revive her and transport her to hospital. She'd then fully wake up in the hospital, rip the IV out of her arm, throw her bed pan at hospital security, and run out into the night WITH ONE FUCKING SHOE ON to find more dope. (Of course, running past the bewildered medics who just brought her in and still haven't finished the paperwork or disinfecting their stretcher). And then she'd do this all over again. And again. AND AGAIN. She would be a frequent flyer, and almost every medical professional, cleaning staff member, emergency service worker, and recovery volunteer in the area would have personally met her. They also would have been able in instantly recall her first name, last name, and medical history. TMI: I may or may not have dealt with a few (dozen) like this in some way.


That was a little dark, so to lighten the mood, I found this in a YouTube comments section. I'm not going to post the image with the name of the poster, because I don't believe they created it (as I've seen it a few times now). I imagine the song being sung to the 'Distrubed' version of 'Sounds of Silence' instead of the 'Simon and Garfunkel' original:

Hello DoorDash my old friend,
I've called to order food again.
Because my viewers are all leaving.
I've pooped myself while I was sleeping.
And the vision,
of chicken, in my brain,
it still remains.
600 pounds.... of silence.

I've ate a dinner meant for 4,
10,000 calories, maybe more.
People eating without binging.
People breathing without wheezing.
People chor-ee-o-griff dances, but
Amber never dared.
NO ONE CARES!
Trolling herself..... into silence.