- Joined
- Sep 20, 2016
Jesus is her girlfriend now.
Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.
- Thread starter PiggyPie
- Start date
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
CHERCH GUURRRRLfriend. She's OB--SESSSED.
My wife just said she wouldn't be surprised if Fat Albert, in her love-bombing her goldbricking waste of space of a mother, love bombs her either with opportunities to get drugs, or even buys them outright.
Now... I told her though, I didn't see that happening. To me, it looks far more likely we'll see the gambling addiction develop and flourish to the point of driving a wedge between the mother and her boyfriend.
But... going to the trashbag slot joints opens up an opportunity for Hambutt to rope in another fat lezbeen. One that needs a few more bucks for the slot machine because she already bought that sandwich combo at Molly's before getting kicked out of there.
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2022
JESUS TAKE THE WIPES...TAKE THEM FROM MY HANDS.. I CANT WIPE ON MY OWNNNNNN
- Joined
- Dec 1, 2018
Hmm, those nice, friendly superXian types offer their own well of exploitation by FatAl. "You need a ride, honey? Sure, that's no problem, I'm going out anyway, I'll pick you up", morphs shortly to "The store? Again? Well, I was just going to...., well ok, if it's an emergency." Lots more people to use. Should be fun for her.
Also, still waiting on you to define "love", Albert. chop chop
Also, still waiting on you to define "love", Albert. chop chop
FarmVille
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2021
Mamalynn and amber share 50% of the same genetics. I would bet a meal at cheesecake factory mama will be fine chauffeuring her lard ass daughter around so long as she gets YouTube bucks to wage on bingo in return.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
Here among the Wommarts
in the OKC
Amber Lynn's a fatass on the MOOve
Burdened with no doordash
Shunned by lezbianzz
Looking for a Gorlfriend she can love!
LOOOOOOOKing for a Gorlfrand
who puts up with Amber's LAHS
There, her other exes
Never say goodbye
There she'll hook up with Destiny
And Jade and Eric too
LOOOOOKing for a Gorlfrand
(Hurry)
Amber's asscrack's full of poo!
--Vestal Goodman and the Happy Goodmans
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- Joined
- Aug 21, 2022
*looks around*
Hmmm, nearly a day and no awesome recapper has responded to your hail
I'll fill in until they're able to warp in.Plot summary with commentary! A shorter one than usual, as I'm sure everyone has already yelled and tossed popcorn at their screens for this one (lol not really - you've already learned that I get way too carried away with these logs). Take us in!
"Hello. Good morning. Just woke up". Likely at the crack of noon. Awesome.
Amber is spending the day with grandma, methma, and *the competition* (aka: Kristine's boyfriend). I've noticed that in all of these family get-togethers, there has been NO AUNT-TAMMIE. Hmmm... Tam-Tam, come back to visit us. We've kept your account warm for you! No need to be afraid; we don't *really* bite (... mostly).
"Do you guys think this is cute?". NO! No one thinks ANY OF THIS is cute! Hair talk [SKIP]
Amber shows off her Cheese Strings wrapped in highly processed luncheon meat as if this were some new invention, and not something that she's been showing on her channel for at LEAST 7 years (if not since the very beginning). It's like she assumes that everyone watching her is tuning in for the very first time.
Makes a big production of showing off the Gatorade. Don't forget the bev! Nevah nevah nevah!!
Eating on camera [SKIP]
Amber talks about walking her trash to the dumpster instead of waiting for trash valet, and she TOTALLY does that sometimes. The massive pile of boxes blocking your bathroom door last week said otherwise, Ambo.
JUMPCUT!! Welcome to Life.Church! ... !!!!!! There's a place for you here. --- ... !!!! 1/2 second of music and flashing lights.
JUMPCUT!! Welcome to OKC's skid-row Casino! ... !!! There's a place for you here as well! Minutes of music and flashing lights. Sorry, Amber, Bossman Jack does this better.
Amber claims to win the jackpot, but actually won the $638.23 "Major"... something. I'll give her credit here, because these video slot machines seem to be designed to be impossible to fully understand.
Obligatory bathroom mirror selfie!
Jumpcut!! Back home. The only reason they went was because it was for Birth-Canal's birthday, and she wanted to go - nothing AT ALL to do with Amber or Kristine.
[In case you're wondering, 'Birth-Canal' was Aunt-Tammie's name for her and Kristine's mother... apparently because the grandma is a raging cunt or something. Also keep in mind that this is the elderly person that Kristine went to jail for beating up
Also: no service dogs were harmed in the filming of this vlog.]
Amber insists that she saved the casino winnings instead of spending them. Of course, she needs it to maintain her admitted $3K/month takeout habit.
Amber fell in love with a female singer "at instant glance" who was performing on stage at 'church'. Yeah.... you stand LESS THAN a 0% chance of hooking up. How many weeks before we start hearing about her being 'heartbroken' over THIS complete and utter stranger?
Don't worry, you guize. Her beliefs haven't changed! She still doesn't believe in God; she's just using them for supply (like everyone/everything else in her life). Don't worry, Ambo, no one's worried. Whether or not you believe in God/A higher power is the LEAST of your problems.
JUMPCUT!! Wasabi!!! Licking the salt off of Amber's meaty mitt. 1 of 3 pets accounted for.
[PLACARD: next day]
JUMPCUT!! Time to organize the spice cabinet which contains nothing more than salt, garlic salt, and pepper.
FREEZE FRAME!!
WTF! You see that oil bottle? Remember less than 3 weeks ago Amber burned her eggs to the pan because she hadn't yet bought oil? 2 or so weeks later and the bottle is already a quarter empty. Bitch eats takeout and uses Drew (the air fryer) the odd time she cooks. Is she DRINKING THE OIL?! Anyway, Amber gets out one of her 10,000 plastic containers and moves the shit around a bit.
JUMPCUT!! Amber shows her daily routine of using a lint roller on her couch (instead of vacuuming). We know this is bullshit, because she says that she also does this daily on her bed... when she's already admitted that she doesn't make her bed.
JUMPCUT!! Amber hurples into frame carrying a laundry bag that's as big and lumpy as she is. Didn't put the stuff away after bringing it home from the laundromat, because nothing says "don't need no caretaker" more than wrinkled and crumpled clothing. Also note that she doesn't actually SHOW us her putting them away.
JUMPCUT!! Bullshit Storytime! Amber found some randos boxers and a single sock in with her laundry, because of course bitch isn't going to check and make sure the machines are empty before throwing her clothes in! No one cares! [SKIP]
JUMPCUT!! Drew (the air fryer) is going to make some more pork jerky for Ambo. This 5oz or so of meat is SO SATISFYING that she doesn't eat anything else with it! Either total bullshit (as we've seen the 2 FAMILY SIZED ravioli bags you bought), or she's saving her calories for the buzzBalls she's going to have later. Maybe BOLTH. More 'taste tests' on camera.
Amber overseasons her paper-thin pork chops (honestly, at this point, can't you just call those things back-bacon?). Anyway, Storytime! Want to know why she's out of garlic salt? Well, she dumped the whole bottle out on her BUTTERED RAMEN last night when she was drunk. The whole point of this storytime was to let everyone know that after getting asspats during her BPD video about deciding to not drink anymore... she went right back to drinking. OH NOEZ!!! Is she okay!? Does she have a drinking problem?! What was Amber thinking?!
To find the answers to these questions (that NO ONE CARES about), tune in next time: Same FAT time, same FAT channel! Back to the shit-show.
Amber gives a tutorial on how to ruin perfectly good food using a cheapo air-fryer (don't worry Drew, no one blames YOU for these atrocities). "It's so simple, it's SCARY". And yet you STILL manage to fuck it up. Ambo, who usually likes her food piping hot, leaves her chops out to get to room temperature. I guess the bacterial growth gives it that extra zing.
JUMPCUT!! Amber talks about all of the positive comments she's been getting (by those non-existent people in her DMs) for coming forward with her BPD diagnosis.
JUMPCUT!! Finally done with the previews and on to the main feature! Amber's going to be vague to 'protect all parties' (translation: to make her look good and Jade look bad). Jade wanted to get back together with Ambo after they both worked on themselves. Amber kept rejecting Jade to choose and prioritize the random girl that she texted with for 2 two weeks. I mean, Jade was her ex for a reason. Amber was choosing her happiness! When it all fell through with the rando, Amber tried to lure Jade back with a promise of "why don't we try poly?", further proving that Jade REALLY WAS JADE and not "a new girlfriend who's local".
Despite all of this, Jade loved Amber so much!! No mention from Amber about how much she loved and respected Jade though.
Insert "You only know a tiny bit of everything that's going on behind the scenes" line.
Insert "Leaving out details to protect OTHER PEOPLE" line.
[PLACARD: next day]
JUMPCUT!! Unmade bed. Twinkie! 2 of 3 pets accounted for. RARITY!! 3 of 3 pets accounted for! BINGO!!!
Amber was going to get back in bed, but Rarity took her spot. Hahah, so cat-like. Especially at 3am in the middle of winter. "I don't care that you had to pee, hoo-mon! I now claim this toasty-warm spot as MINE"...
... wait wait wait. Amber says that she was going to get into bed, but Rarity took her spot. Then said that Rarity was in the bed to hide because maintenance was in her apartment. So... Amber was planning on getting back into bed with some maintenance dude puttering around her apartment? Nevermind, this was just yet another one of Ambo's 'stream of (un)consciousness' ramblings. [SKIP]
JUMPCUT!! Maintenance guy is gone, and it's daytime when normal people are awake, so Amber's going to go back to bed. Byee!!
Amber is spending the day with grandma, methma, and *the competition* (aka: Kristine's boyfriend). I've noticed that in all of these family get-togethers, there has been NO AUNT-TAMMIE. Hmmm... Tam-Tam, come back to visit us. We've kept your account warm for you! No need to be afraid; we don't *really* bite (... mostly).
"Do you guys think this is cute?". NO! No one thinks ANY OF THIS is cute! Hair talk [SKIP]
Amber shows off her Cheese Strings wrapped in highly processed luncheon meat as if this were some new invention, and not something that she's been showing on her channel for at LEAST 7 years (if not since the very beginning). It's like she assumes that everyone watching her is tuning in for the very first time.
Makes a big production of showing off the Gatorade. Don't forget the bev! Nevah nevah nevah!!
Eating on camera [SKIP]
Amber talks about walking her trash to the dumpster instead of waiting for trash valet, and she TOTALLY does that sometimes. The massive pile of boxes blocking your bathroom door last week said otherwise, Ambo.
JUMPCUT!! Welcome to Life.Church! ... !!!!!! There's a place for you here. --- ... !!!! 1/2 second of music and flashing lights.
JUMPCUT!! Welcome to OKC's skid-row Casino! ... !!! There's a place for you here as well! Minutes of music and flashing lights. Sorry, Amber, Bossman Jack does this better.
Amber claims to win the jackpot, but actually won the $638.23 "Major"... something. I'll give her credit here, because these video slot machines seem to be designed to be impossible to fully understand.
Obligatory bathroom mirror selfie!
Jumpcut!! Back home. The only reason they went was because it was for Birth-Canal's birthday, and she wanted to go - nothing AT ALL to do with Amber or Kristine.
[In case you're wondering, 'Birth-Canal' was Aunt-Tammie's name for her and Kristine's mother... apparently because the grandma is a raging cunt or something. Also keep in mind that this is the elderly person that Kristine went to jail for beating up
Also: no service dogs were harmed in the filming of this vlog.]
Amber insists that she saved the casino winnings instead of spending them. Of course, she needs it to maintain her admitted $3K/month takeout habit.
Amber fell in love with a female singer "at instant glance" who was performing on stage at 'church'. Yeah.... you stand LESS THAN a 0% chance of hooking up. How many weeks before we start hearing about her being 'heartbroken' over THIS complete and utter stranger?
Don't worry, you guize. Her beliefs haven't changed! She still doesn't believe in God; she's just using them for supply (like everyone/everything else in her life). Don't worry, Ambo, no one's worried. Whether or not you believe in God/A higher power is the LEAST of your problems.
JUMPCUT!! Wasabi!!! Licking the salt off of Amber's meaty mitt. 1 of 3 pets accounted for.
[PLACARD: next day]
JUMPCUT!! Time to organize the spice cabinet which contains nothing more than salt, garlic salt, and pepper.
FREEZE FRAME!!
WTF! You see that oil bottle? Remember less than 3 weeks ago Amber burned her eggs to the pan because she hadn't yet bought oil? 2 or so weeks later and the bottle is already a quarter empty. Bitch eats takeout and uses Drew (the air fryer) the odd time she cooks. Is she DRINKING THE OIL?! Anyway, Amber gets out one of her 10,000 plastic containers and moves the shit around a bit.
JUMPCUT!! Amber shows her daily routine of using a lint roller on her couch (instead of vacuuming). We know this is bullshit, because she says that she also does this daily on her bed... when she's already admitted that she doesn't make her bed.
JUMPCUT!! Amber hurples into frame carrying a laundry bag that's as big and lumpy as she is. Didn't put the stuff away after bringing it home from the laundromat, because nothing says "don't need no caretaker" more than wrinkled and crumpled clothing. Also note that she doesn't actually SHOW us her putting them away.
JUMPCUT!! Bullshit Storytime! Amber found some randos boxers and a single sock in with her laundry, because of course bitch isn't going to check and make sure the machines are empty before throwing her clothes in! No one cares! [SKIP]
JUMPCUT!! Drew (the air fryer) is going to make some more pork jerky for Ambo. This 5oz or so of meat is SO SATISFYING that she doesn't eat anything else with it! Either total bullshit (as we've seen the 2 FAMILY SIZED ravioli bags you bought), or she's saving her calories for the buzzBalls she's going to have later. Maybe BOLTH. More 'taste tests' on camera.
Amber overseasons her paper-thin pork chops (honestly, at this point, can't you just call those things back-bacon?). Anyway, Storytime! Want to know why she's out of garlic salt? Well, she dumped the whole bottle out on her BUTTERED RAMEN last night when she was drunk. The whole point of this storytime was to let everyone know that after getting asspats during her BPD video about deciding to not drink anymore... she went right back to drinking. OH NOEZ!!! Is she okay!? Does she have a drinking problem?! What was Amber thinking?!
To find the answers to these questions (that NO ONE CARES about), tune in next time: Same FAT time, same FAT channel! Back to the shit-show.
Amber gives a tutorial on how to ruin perfectly good food using a cheapo air-fryer (don't worry Drew, no one blames YOU for these atrocities). "It's so simple, it's SCARY". And yet you STILL manage to fuck it up. Ambo, who usually likes her food piping hot, leaves her chops out to get to room temperature. I guess the bacterial growth gives it that extra zing.
JUMPCUT!! Amber talks about all of the positive comments she's been getting (by those non-existent people in her DMs) for coming forward with her BPD diagnosis.
JUMPCUT!! Finally done with the previews and on to the main feature! Amber's going to be vague to 'protect all parties' (translation: to make her look good and Jade look bad). Jade wanted to get back together with Ambo after they both worked on themselves. Amber kept rejecting Jade to choose and prioritize the random girl that she texted with for 2 two weeks. I mean, Jade was her ex for a reason. Amber was choosing her happiness! When it all fell through with the rando, Amber tried to lure Jade back with a promise of "why don't we try poly?", further proving that Jade REALLY WAS JADE and not "a new girlfriend who's local".
Despite all of this, Jade loved Amber so much!! No mention from Amber about how much she loved and respected Jade though.
Insert "You only know a tiny bit of everything that's going on behind the scenes" line.
Insert "Leaving out details to protect OTHER PEOPLE" line.
[PLACARD: next day]
JUMPCUT!! Unmade bed. Twinkie! 2 of 3 pets accounted for. RARITY!! 3 of 3 pets accounted for! BINGO!!!
Amber was going to get back in bed, but Rarity took her spot. Hahah, so cat-like. Especially at 3am in the middle of winter. "I don't care that you had to pee, hoo-mon! I now claim this toasty-warm spot as MINE"...
... wait wait wait. Amber says that she was going to get into bed, but Rarity took her spot. Then said that Rarity was in the bed to hide because maintenance was in her apartment. So... Amber was planning on getting back into bed with some maintenance dude puttering around her apartment? Nevermind, this was just yet another one of Ambo's 'stream of (un)consciousness' ramblings. [SKIP]
JUMPCUT!! Maintenance guy is gone, and it's daytime when normal people are awake, so Amber's going to go back to bed. Byee!!
TL;DR: FILLER! Bullshit, made-up-on-the-spot stories to get the video to 10 minutes. Amber shows bullshit little tasks and chores around the apartment (that she TOTALLY does), and pretends to not be eating a lot. Amber went to church, then to the casino with Mam and Granny, and won about $600. Maintenance came in (presumably to either check her dryer, or alievaite tenant concerns of a decomposing corpse in her unit). Amber claims that her rejecting Wipey to persue rando texting girl is what made Wipey not want to get back together with Amber. Amber offered to get involved in a polygamous relationship to try and win Wipey back, again proving that Wipey has ALWAYS been Jade and there was no 'new, local' girlfriend. Amber apparently drinks vegetable oil. 3 of 3 pets accounted for.
Wipey really did love Amber! Jade wanted them to both work on themselves and get back together again! And never forget:
The breakup was mutual.
[Edited to Add:]
@FatalTater I think the rando Amber was texting was real. Amber's a bad actor, and she was behaving EXACTLY the same way towards Jade that she did towards Becky once Jade was talking to her. Amber thought she found a new girl, so it was time to discard Jade.. you know, while being 'pleasant' enough (ha!) to push Jade into helping Amber pack up, find new digs, and move. Then WHOOPS, rando texting girl ended up just being a rando texting girl instead of a new soulmate (I know! Weird, right?!), and it was time to hoover Jade back with the "I didn't mean it", "I'll do better", and "I love you I miss you" lies.
Last edited:
- Joined
- Jul 18, 2022
Oof these hard-core evangelical churches are just fun looking cults wrapped in a shiny bow.
Laymen don't know because they preach love and acceptance to them. They tend to have a good bit of associate pastors that have smaller groups they pull from the most regular laymen that they start grooming by controlling their clothes, music, movies, and slowly start separating from their friends and family by letting them think they're backsliding from associating with people already going to hell. The acceptance part is only talking to them about their version of Jesus slowly and recruiting them.
Love this for ChurchLynn
Laymen don't know because they preach love and acceptance to them. They tend to have a good bit of associate pastors that have smaller groups they pull from the most regular laymen that they start grooming by controlling their clothes, music, movies, and slowly start separating from their friends and family by letting them think they're backsliding from associating with people already going to hell. The acceptance part is only talking to them about their version of Jesus slowly and recruiting them.
Love this for ChurchLynn
- Joined
- Apr 18, 2020
Amber still feeding us the "Master Hand loved me sooooooooooooo much she can't even bear to speak to me" shit when we all know Wipey kept Amber sweet as long as she needed to before hightailing it the fuck out of Oklahoma and changing her number.
Anyway, still fat, still boring, show laaeeeygs, etc.
Anyway, still fat, still boring, show laaeeeygs, etc.
- Joined
- Sep 23, 2021
I just wanna see Hambo start stalking the church singer's socials and click baiting that she's gaining her religion and more weight.
Turd Fergusson
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 28, 2019
If I remember correctly, she was in communication with a dietitian in 2019 or 2020. This dietitian had to block Amber because she was texting her constantly and I bet at any time of the day and night with likely stupid questions or comments. Here, I think she did the same with the latest woman she texted. With this incessant texting, this poor woman probably realise how much of a nutcase Amber is.
notfoodienotbeauty
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Feb 15, 2021
@Boolean Bitch - Wipey really did love Amber! Jade wanted them to both work on themselves and get back together again!
Isn't that almost word for word what every other girlfriend said when they escaped, I mean broke up, with her too?
I'm finding it so funny that she feel in love with someone after a few days, or tried to make jade jealous and then it backfired on her. She really showed her didn't she, that she could get a new caretaker immediately. I'm imaging her sitting on her fat ass, cackling like crazy, probably even "jade look at her isn't she gorgeous" just like she did with Becky. I wish I could have been there to see her face when she got smacked down a few pegs when her new forever love decided she didn't want to even meet her nasty ass in person. Now she spends her days waddling around her apartment crying over her two broken hearts.
Isn't that almost word for word what every other girlfriend said when they escaped, I mean broke up, with her too?
I'm finding it so funny that she feel in love with someone after a few days, or tried to make jade jealous and then it backfired on her. She really showed her didn't she, that she could get a new caretaker immediately. I'm imaging her sitting on her fat ass, cackling like crazy, probably even "jade look at her isn't she gorgeous" just like she did with Becky. I wish I could have been there to see her face when she got smacked down a few pegs when her new forever love decided she didn't want to even meet her nasty ass in person. Now she spends her days waddling around her apartment crying over her two broken hearts.
FarmVille
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2021
We all saw amber legitimately heartbroken when Dusty dumped her. This ‘woe is me’ over the hand and some rando she texted is just lazy content.
Cornfed
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 11, 2023
I didn't think it was possible for her to get any more boring.
The only interesting thing that may come out of this is her continued financial decline into position where she finds herself losing what little she has. Now her being poor, fat, squealing white trash would be some primo entertainment.
Until then, eh...not even Chantal is entertaining anymore.
The only interesting thing that may come out of this is her continued financial decline into position where she finds herself losing what little she has. Now her being poor, fat, squealing white trash would be some primo entertainment.
Until then, eh...not even Chantal is entertaining anymore.
- Joined
- Dec 17, 2019
Just think: She'd have to live at least a year, or more, to have a snowball's chance at qualifying for any state DRS/DHS gibs. She can't have any assets or anything in a savings account even to get Medicaid.
Love that for hurrrr!
- Joined
- May 13, 2019
Nigga Jade never "looorveeed" Hambo, she was homeless, carless and jobless and the BEAST was an easy, desperate, mark.
Working as a live in caretaker for a couple of years gave her a roof (in a nice apt with gym and pool), hell she even moved in with Becky living there, a car and enough time to get back on her feet financially.
She cracked the whip and for the first time Hambo managed to upload on schedule, was quite impressive.
She needed to pay bills and Jade's car after all.
When Jade was done, she WAS done.
She's one health crisis away from being totally broke, for us to have an idea Boogie insurance is around $900 monthly plus medical bills that aren't covered.
Hambo still has no insurance as far as we know and I don't think she can afford it, even more now that family Lynn is "helping" her.
blubberlubber
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Mar 27, 2023
Is this the longest time Amber has gone without a caregiver? I'm sure she'd find more fat southern lesbians if she went to hang out near a gas station shaking a cup of extra gas change. I know medicare means you can only have about $2000 or so in your account at once if she even has that, so no sugar babying for her for a while.
FarmVille
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Aug 4, 2021
Mekahineyho
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Dec 13, 2022
She lived alone for like 2 months after Dustin moved out the stinky condo, but she had already hooked Becky who would come drive her around on her days off. Seems like the unhinged youtube persona has finally caught up with her cause it seems like no one wants to be her “best friend love of her life” at the molment
- Joined
- Feb 15, 2021
That’s what you get when you tell someone like Amber to “call me anytime if you have questions”. Most people would see that as during standard business hours, and a one off call at that once you’ve tried to action a plan and are confused or missed vital information. Not Amber though, who is likely rarely awake during business hours, and would be looking for answers immediately to the most mundane of questions that happen to pop into her head (or her comments section).