OMG, I am SHOOKETH, guise! Such a high energy, honestlee? BOMB video! It's liiidurally the best EVER, I promise youooo?
I don't think you could try less, Hamber, unless you just didn't post at all. Everyone, visualize the Kabuki theater of Big Al trying to convince everyone she wants to be on a diet of any sort at all. Ready? Note: all vids cued to the relevant part.
Yet another feeder thumbnail selected by
Big Al YouTube. Stupid intro.
Take that idiotic fucking nose ring out of your face or stop fucking touching it. You look like you're always picking your goddamned nose.
Day 27 weighin: 496.6
Is already trying to weasel out of posting the video of the scale each day. "I don't know if you guys want to see these. I know in my personal life, I'll keep doing them." Sure you will, Big Al, sure you will.
For some reason, she's mumbling and talking more softly than her usual screech owl volume. I had to turn on CC for this. Enunciate and project, you lazy twat.
Day two on WW, because day one went so very well. Says she "kinda" went into the negative on weekly points yesterday. Kinda? No, Hamber,you did the equivalent of a bookie's strongman busting up someone's kneecaps with an aluminum bat. I can see the phrase of the day seems to be "it is what it is", because she's said it twice already and we're not even a minute into this shit.
Claims she wants to hold herself accountable, and it was "hard" to log everything. Know what would make it easy? Not eating shitty food.
And without any segue, she wants to show us "something my girlfriend got meeeeee." It's a hideous rose bear she claims she has "always wanted", except we've never, ever heard her utter a single thing about it, just like that everlasting puke green rose thing. This one is white roses, and it's creepy. The bear has no eyes. White roses typically signify purity or innocence. Lawl. Claims she mentioned it to her mom a couple of months ago while on the phone with her, and the "gf" was
eavesdropping listening in overheard her, and now got her one. So I want to know where out there in YT land she saw this thing. She's also still unclear on the whole love-bombing thing.
She is "literally obsessed" with the fucking bear. NO YOU ARE NOT. Stop using the word literally, you sound like a fucking retard because you're always using it where it has no business being used. Like now, you grammatically challenged whale.
"Everything my "gf" has gotten me has been the sweetest, most thoughtful shit ever." Because when I want to compliment my partner's giving abilities, I always call the things they get me "shit". Calls the "gf" the best ever. Whatever. You have said exactly the same thing about every leech you've picked up. You are not the most gifted judge of character.
Is now doing that stupid tongue clicking thing, apparently. Noise just to make noise is not quirky or cute, bitch. It's annoying. And nobody gives a shit about your hair.
First meal: sandwich and hot cheetos, which back in May of last year she said trigger her. (They do not trigger her, she just wants to eat more than one serving because she likes them.) Helluva a meal: processed chicken loaded with sodium, cheetos, loaded with sodium. What is it, Princess? You're now over all your sensitivities to the sodiumz? 12 points. Skipped her running the points of the individual pieces of that shit, because she isn't going to stay within her points. This we know. So why bother?
Takes a bite, stuffs a cheeto in her face, all done while looking directly into the camera. Get that feeder coin, Big Al. Looks off to the side. "And here's my gf." Laughs, acts like she's turning the camera on the "gf". "Just kidding." No one cares. you've beaten that dead horse into the ground.
JFC. Next meal; ramen. A sodium bomb to which she adds more sodium. I'm waiting for her heart to burst out of her chest like the alien in Alien. THAT would be riveting content. Hell, I'd even watch the ads for that.
Does some more feeder bullshit by hooking some ramen, holding it high, then lowering it into her piehole, all while staring at the camera. Sped through that section when she started talking about preparing it the way she did in the previous video and she promises it's "honestly so amazing". Nope.
Is still trying to do....something to her viewers. Claims there was so rum in that Malibu bottle, shitlords, decries the "conspiracy" that she was drinking water or nothing because she didn't make any faces while drinking it (that and the lack of swallowing, dumbass), plops in some footage of her drinking, then making a face. This is why your bullshit attempts to prove anything are stupid, Hamber: One: you are a pathological liar. Two: now you've just given everyone a second conspiracy theory, in that you just went back and staged drinking from the bottle, just so you could make a face while doing it. See how that works? Just fucking move on. Claims she was a little tipsy after. No, Hamber, a 500 pound whale taking a few drinks of sugar water with a whiff of liquor does not get tipsy that way
Next meal: Chipotle. Of course it is. It's a fajita bowl, I guess. Sodium laden bullshit she spent however much on instead of just making it herself. A quick Google shows between $6.50 and $7.50, depending on the meat ( or vegetarian) option one chooses. You could literally (<----- Take note, Hamber, proper usage.) spend the same amount on the groceries to make this several times over - there are even copycat recipes for it - but nope, why do that and be thrifty when you can throw your money down the disposal on Uber Eats plus a minimum order requirement. And also: are yo not the one praising the "gf's" cooking ability? If she looooves you shtooo much and is supportive in ways no one has ever been, why the fuck is she not cooking for you? Also had spicy Doritos with the queso ($5.25 for a large, on the side) she ordered from Chipotle as well, because they forgot the chips. Forgot the chips. Chipotle. OK. Point total: 33. JFC, way to be mindful of what you're fucking eating.
Know what I haven't seen thus far? A single fruit. Or vegetable - and I'm not counting whatever tiny bit of veg is in that bowl, which maybe was half a cup. I thought fruits and veggies were important to you, Big Al. Or is that only when you're shitting on WL doctors?
In the car, for "one of them thoughtful situations?" One of THOSE, GrammarLynn. And it is not a situation. If anything, it would have been time for you to break out a "moment". Fail.
"GF" got her a blanket to keep in the car, because Hamber is two. Blah blah, Twinkie is no longer terrified to ride in the car. I'm happy for that, anyway. Too bad she's still stuck with a 500 whale who almost crushes her from time to time.
Day 28: 496.8
Whines about gaining weight. Feels like at night she's "kinda binging at McDonald's." You are not KINDA eating a bunch of food at McD's. You ARE eating a bunch of food at McD's. "I truly don't know like, why." I do. Because you want to eat whatever you want, whenever you want, in the amounts you want. There. Mystery of the Amberverse solved! And that's what she did: ate at McD's again last night (I'm presuming the 27th). So is that where y'all were going in the car? A quick dash out for some shitty food? Since you don't drive, it would fall to the "supportive gf" to take you there. Yes, Hamber, you've certainly never
had support
like this before.
"Literally" promised herself that there will not be a repeat performance of McD's tonight. Apparently, this is her taking accountability: confessing to the camera that she ate shit. Claims she's "frustrated". Then stop pretending like you really want to diet. I guarantee that will make you happy: gorge yourself on gorditas from Taco Bell! Stuff sushi down your piehole! Nosh on naan and cram crab down your throat! Pig out on pad thai! Go hog wild! That would be better content than this garbage.
Says she was doing so good (so well, GrammarLynn), and feels like she just "slipped off" that good streak. No, what happened is the same thing that happens every time you latch onto someone just because they showed the slightest bit of interest and you can't stand to be alone: you got comfortable with them, and you reverted back to your true self: a glutton.
She's "being honest" with us, this slide back to her real self is worrying because as we all know, she gains whatever she lost plus some. She "cannot let that happen again this time." Words mean nothing coming from you, Big Al. You burned that capital ages ago. The "gf" is super supportive". Sure. Once again, support she's never had before except exactly like she's had before. Alas, the "gf" cannot lose the weight for Hamber, and I bet Big Al just cries over the fact no one can lose the weight for her, no matter how many xmas presents or t-shirts or cars she buys for them.
Blah blah, people are saying the "gf" is not supportive, but Big Al says that's a lah! The "gf" is supportive. Except we have yet to see that, because from my vantage point, it surely does look like the same shit Big Al does all the time. Big Al says it's up to her and only her and she's just here to admit "I suck." Finally, one true thing.
Blah blah, nobody gives a shit it snowed where you are. She waddles around, annoying the fuck out of the animals, all of whom are trying to sleep.
Thankfully, that's the end.
TL;DW: nothing's changed. She eats shitty food and annoys the animals.
Edited to add:
