Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose. - Viktor Frankl
I think that sums up Hamber's pointless life rather well. Psst, Fatty: if you're looking for another book to read when you give up on A Little Life, you could pick up Frankl's Man's Search for Meaning.
come to target with me, target haul, & office makeover | vlog 3 - August 2, 2022
Just how many fucking office redos do you need, really, BeetusLynn? Ah, sorry - sometimes I forget that you're only happy about Day One shit, not the Day 100, Day 200 shit. Carry on, and let's get this bullshit recapped.
"Welcome to another vlog." Boring. Stupid intro.
July 20, 2022 "SO, I'm actually just planeen what I'm gonna be eateen." Hera forbid you start off any fucking video with something other than food or food-related talk. It's too bad there aren't transcripts of her bullshit videos. I would LOVE to see a word cloud of those.
"In a future video, I want to do a "What I ate Today on Ozempic"". Any random vlog will do that. It isn't like you're going to eat anything different than you do. She's claiming amazing MENTAL effects, that just the mere thought of food is making her sick and that somehow, Ozempic is making her "want to eat healthier, eat less" and JFC, Hamber, no, it isn't. It's creating physiological calls, which you're then, as usual, fucking up with muh mentalz ad attributing brain chemical nonsense to. Says she has been cooking all her meals - bullshit - and when she sits down, it takes her 30 minutes to eat - questionable; if the vagus nerve is firing as Oz makes it paired with delayed gastric emptying, it's unlikely any regular person would sit for a full 30 minute session. They'd just get full, probably to a point of discomfort, and stop eating. Oh wait, you're HamberLynn. Of course you would sit there to se if you could eat more. It's what you've been doing all fucking day for at least nine years of recording, anyhow.
LOL, she's trying to convince us that "every bite feels like a chore". Also claims the weight is just "flying off". Whatever you need to tell yourself, Fat Ham. But we all know better: if it were true that you were shedding weight like a snake sheds its skin, you'd be filming that shit, rubbing it in the face of every single person in haydur nation. Ozempic is making her nauseated, 24/7. It's almost as if that's one of the listed side effects, you tool. You could have asked the doc for nausea meds, or just call them and ask them to send something in now, but then you wouldn't be able to bitch about it on camera. You'd also be removing one of the excuses you'll use to stop taking it.
She's nauseated, y'all - but she is going to sit there and drink her protein shake, with her tablespoon of coffee and added fake sweeteners to an already sweet drink that you shouldn't be drinking. But hey, what the fuck do I know, NutritionLynn.
Big Ham's Book Club, and she doesn't want to give any "spoilers". You JUST fucking started the goddamned book, Mentioning things from it at this point is NOT spoilers. Can't you just even read a fucking book and give progress updates on it correctly?
WASH YOUR GREASY, NASTY HAIR.
"My mind, expeshully at night". PerfectGrammarLynn Cries at night, because her mind wants food, and welcome to the reason Hamber will never lose weight.
Aw, Hamby is having emotions, weeping because she can't go get half the pantry and sit there in front of the tv, stuffing all the snacky shit down her piehole.
Does this stupid weird voice about people giving her shit because she's using "a medicine" - IT'S A DRUG, WTF MUST YOU ALWAYS SPEAK LIKE A FUCKING CHILD = to lose weight because she can't do it herself, and then says, regular voice, "No, I can't." Well, la-di-fuckig-da, look who told the fucking truth for a change. Too bad you still don't have that extra part of the equation nailed down: you don't need drugs. You need someone else controlling your food. Like, say, an inpatient program.
Says she should be the walking ad for Ozempic, because if this "works for Amberlynn Reid, then it's gonna work for anybody." I know you're looking for asspats because your TRex arms can't reach anywhere to pat yourself on the fucking back, but maybe slow your roll there, Fatty, until you've actually lost significant weight. And stop talking about yourself in the goddamned third person.
Claims she has heard from people who had WLS and then subsequently took Oz that they lost weight faster on Oz than they did with WLS, and that is a flat out fucking lie, Hamber. Welcome to your first two videos reported for dispensing medical misinformation.
Oh, here were go. Citing the cost, she's "just not sure how long ]I'm] gonna be doing it." It isn't the cost that bothers you, Fat Ham. It's the fact you can't go raid the pantry every night after you've filmed a day claiming you've "only ate" 1600 calories in a day. LOL. She's "heard" that some of the side effects get more extreme the "higher dosage you go" - you mean "as the dosage increases", WriterLynn? - and no shit, Sherlock, that's typical with a lot of meds, dumbass, until the body inures itself to the side effects of a higher dose.
DoctorLynn Medicine Woman telling us all she thinks she needs to stay on the .25 dose "for a hot minute" because she can't imagine what it would feel like on the .5. Ding! Another excuse target shot.
Horrid "molment". It is not a moment, you illiterate behemoth. She's is so unfunny, it's astonishing. They've put Twinkie up high so she's looming over Hamber's shoulder, and the fucking dog is terrified. but here's Hambo, asking the screen if anything seems strange to us. Put your goddamned dog on the floor where she fucking belongs, you fucking clown.
Goddamn, she is massive. And we might have been joking the other day about gravity, but fucking hell, her shit really is migrating south. That lump of whatever is on her right side is ten times the size it was when she was trying to be sexy, dancing in that black dress thing a bit back. She claimed in one of those idiotic Q&As that she has had multiple CT scans over the past two years, and that's just another fucking lie. One, you told everyone that you were now going to finally go back to the doctor, meaning you haven't been (which we knew). And two, a scan would have showed what looks like uncontrolled growth of that shit on your side, dumbass, and you wouldn't have wasted a second coming on YT and recorded something about it, looking for sympathy and asspats. There's something seriously wrong with you, and more than in the sociopathic narc and pathological liar way, Fat Ham. But fuck, you don't give a shit, so why the fuck am I wasting my breath. You claimed that cancer would be your "rock bottom" and claimed you had cancer. Didn't change you at all. Now, when it looks like your liveris about to explode out of you because you won't stop shoveling shit into your gullet, meh. It is what it is, right?
What's in the bag? another ill-fitting tent? I kid, of course. It's all ill-fitting tents on this fat fucking retard. Has her My Gorlfriend, Wipey, jade Francis of New York, currently residing in Lexington, Kentucky shout an "I love you" for the fucking camera, which she dutifully repeats back, just so we all know this is a real, totally not fake relationship, and did you guise know she is also a lesbian? Gasp!
Just put on the fucking whatever it is from the Horrid bag, bitch.
"I have had this bag for a few months." Porpoise laugh. nobody fucking cares. Shocker, she has some "Torrid cash" that she will be using to order yet another round of shit she'll never wear. "Oh, this is pantalones. Oh, I heard that pantalones means pants, I don't know why someone told me it was underwear, but that's fine." Whuuuuut? ResearchLynn didn't look into how to say underwear in Spanish, and just believed some random person on the internet? But she tried to kick someone about that, in regard to her mother's PUBLIC ARREST RECORD. Who would ever have thought that such a dainty, proper gorl would be a giant, raging hypocrite? I think I shall retire to my fainting couch. Jeeves, the smelling salts, at once! I do deh-CLAHR that I have the vapors!
"I know I said I don't like floral", but look at this huge pair of underwear with flowers! Stop kidding yourself. You have the fashion sense of a trailer park grandma. That pattern, in fact, looks remarkably like a dress she has bought previously. Same colors and all. I guess when you make those HamberBux, you have to dress appropriately, which means matching everything, visible and not. Blah blah "reminds me of, like, mwahhvuh". I had to go back to that twice more to make sure I heard that corectly. IT'S MAUUHHVE" you retarded fuck. JFC, the amount of material it took to make that pair of underwear is staggering.
Apparently, the tent underwear didn't count, so we have to sit through another. Again explaining the sizes she orders shit in and NOBODY CARES. It doesn't fucking matter. They're all huge, and none of them fit your grotesque, deformed shithole of a body. "So apparently I'm too sassy". No, shirt, she is not sassy, no matter how many times she really wants to believe she's a sassy black woman. She's a loathesome, manipulative fat bitch who fails at everything, ranging from diets to learning to relationships and everything in between. Plentt of room on that fucking shirt to write all that, too.
Skipping through, and she has to shove her sad tits into the camera. Does the stupid throw the shit in the air and jumpcut to her wearing it. Getting old, Fatty. "Kinda cozy" she says. Ugly and stupid as fuck, just like the person wearing it, says I. She's tryin to be FashionLynn, but get real, Fatty. You know as much about haute couture as you do anything else, and that is nothing. "It's not just a (air quotes here) typical t-shirt, which I really like." No. No, it isn't. Because it uses enough fucking material FOR SIX NORMAL SIZED WOMEN, lardass. LOL: "It'shard to see how well it fits, because the viewfinder is too small..." Tell us about it, you fat fuck. You are too fucking fat to try the pouty model look, Hamber. you look like a toddler being told they cannot have that tenth Oreo,.
FFS. The fucking bugbite on her wrist. "This is an example" of her fucking need to collect diagnoses. Skipping, because I am not indulging this particular bullshit.
More annoying the animals with that high pitched squealing.
They're in the parking lot of Target, and of course she's excited. But holy hell, her breathing. You should not sound like a runner who just finished a five K run, StaminaLynn, just from walking ten feet away from the fucking car toward the door. Can't wait until we get the O2 generator era. That'll be fun.
Target crap: she wanders around, touching crap. She is "trying to lay off of sweets". Sure you are. She's now looking for the jewelry. YOU DO NOT NEED MORE JEWELRY. She wishes she could buy every poetry book. Empty calories for the body, empty calories for the head. YOU DO NOT NEED MORE HOME CRAP. Thirty fucking minutes in Target, and can't find the earrings. You could just fucking ASK
a worker, you goddamned spam brain.
Oh good, wandering in the food. Bag of salad mix, devoid of nutrition. Oranges. Salmon. You should not be eating salami. But go ahead, NutritionLynn.
Now the vitamins. Melatonin. Whatever. More protein drink. You shouldn't be drinking your calories, Fatty.
Bullshit HABA crap, which, according to her, is set up "so kuyewt". All the shit she's getting is food scented.
More fucking journals.
"Listen to those bugs in the tree," she says, as she wheezes her way back to the car. They're sih-KAY-duhs, you stupid bitch. How the fuck you can live in the South this long and not fucking know this is beyond me.
Reading the label to us of some chicken thing, because god forbid you just say what it is.
Tells us we should see the pile of goodwill shit. Why? You'll just buy more shit to replace whatever you throw away at goodwill. Who cares.
STOP CALLING EVERYTHING A GODDAMNED MOMENT, YOU FUCKING ILLITERATE WHITE TRASH RETARD.
Bunch of blather in the car as she yaps trying to fill the dead air. You could just listen to fucking music and not film. That's an option, lardass.
"When I go back to the doctor for my ozempic moment..." IT IS NOT A FUCKING MOMENT, BITCH.
You know why your poetry fucking sucks, beyond it being full of fourth grade bullshit unimaginative imagery? Because your vocabulary sucks, too. WriterLynn.
Like like like like like. Your crutch words suck too.
Claims she is getting her shit together. She is "slowly figuring it out". No, you aren'tr. Someone else is.If it were up to you, you'd be 700 pounds, sitting on the couch, scrolling through Amazon for "super kyewt" plastic crap, getting UE or DD delivered every four hours, and the animals would either have escaped or died somewhere in your fucking hoard. Congratulations. You continue your streak of not lifting a finger to do a single fucking thing for yourself.
She's wondering how her My Gorlfriend, Wipey, Jade Francis of New York, is going to get some chair she's bought to the car without it getting wet. Well, Hamber, if you had more than one functional brain cell that wasn't preoccupied with food every goddamned second, you might understand that other people can think of things to try. So maybe just sit there and keep rattling on about how extra perfect your health is and how you're such a pluviophile.
Stop fucking singing, Your voice sucks.
WE DO NOT CARE ABOUT THIS FUCKING CONVO IF SHE IS NOT GOING TO BE ON CAMERA.
18:26-18:54 - Driving through torrential rain. Caption on the screen: "Rain ASMR from yours truly." Go fuck yourself, Fatty.
That's the chair your My Gorlfriend, Wipey, was so anxious to get? Boring. Stupid.
Blah blah, talking about the cats instead of just shutting the fuck up and letting us watch them without her fucking fake cackling. Skipping.
Melatonin taste test. Can't pronounce the ingredients. And if you don't want calories in your fucking supplements, BUY PILLS AND NOT GUMMIES. Goddamn, you are so fucking stupid.
Don't care don't care. About to pay Mario Kart. Take a fucking shower instead.
Oh, ,FFS. More of this bullshit about estradiol. Pretty goddamned sure your fucking oncologist knows what the fuck they're doing. Now she's casting aspersions on the doctor, and bitch, she should have just let you fucking go along and let that fucking cancer kill you. There isn't a single fucking redeeming feature about you.
TL;DW/R: Acys like Ozempicis going to make her lose 300 pounds. Won't she be surprised when it's abot 12-14 pounds instead. Buys more shit she doesn't need. Ruins every animal moment (<------correct fucking use of moment, Fat Ham) by not shutting her gob. More Horrid shit. Melatonin in gummy form, because why not make it food instead of swallowing a capsule. Still unshowered, hair unwashed. Is now trying once again to demonstrate she knows more than a doctor - and a doctor in a highly complex specialty, at that - and is all tough guy, gonna go in there and ask that doc why she oprescribed "this drug I shouldn't be takeen." Right. because when I talk to some rando on the phone at an office, I instantly believe everything they say. Oh, this absolutely retarded fatass being a hypocrite again? You don't say. The end.