-- VLOGMAS 2022 --
Location: Sitting at her desk.
Amber is doing her makeup and is recommending eyeshadow pallets. I know even less than Amber about makeup, so I have nothing of value to add. New rumour to address: people think Amber thinks Casey Anthony is innocent, and Amber doesn't believe it. NO ONE CARES. Well, 'KaeRants' does, and is out for blood with Amber... but so far it hasn't gotten interesting.
Jump Cut! Day 3 of the Play-Doh Advent Calendar. Small tub of black play-doh and a top hat stamp. Amber already killed the sparkly white turd that she called a snowman by putting it back in the tub, so she's remade it, using the reindeer antlers as arms. I can't believe I'm reporting on this. She played with play-doh, okay?! Amber sings off key for filler.
Jump Cut! Day 3 of the Kitty Cat Advent Calendar. It's a small cloth fish. Office Christmas tree can be seen in the background. Amber throws the fish toy and Rarity scrambles to get off the cat tree to attack it.
Location: Hurpling to the living room.
Time for Amber to open a gift. The presents are the 'grown up advent calendar'. It's a Burts Bees tin containing "a whole Burt's Bees Molment": Shea butter hand repair cream, Coconut foot cream, Rescue Ointment, Beeswax Lipbalm, Hand Salve, Lemon Butter Cuticle Cream. (Amber needs the creams because insert 'dry gorl' joke here).
Jump Cut: Jade can be seen in the background messing with the chalkboard. Amber's confused that it's Day 3, even though she just told us it was.
FOOD!! Panara Bread!!! Amber got a cheddar and broccoli soup (large), a large turkey sandwich with lettuce and onion. Good news! This time they didn't accidentally send Amber 5 bags of chips that she didn't order! Jade got an Asian sesame chicken side salad and a spicy chicken sandwich if you care. Amber's confused and doesn't recognize the product because it's a 'side' salad instead of a mega size.
Location: Hurpling through the apartment.
Amber claims to be an actual walking allergy. This confuses her, as allergies are only supposed to be from the spring, but she suffers from fall allergies. Amber puts up a Google search screenshot talking about Fall allergies.
[While this could be true, it's likely that dust in the apartment is contributing to her allergies. I ended up editing this out of previous reeecaps to try and shorten them (I screwed up. I'm sorry; I'll do better). I left out a part when Amber was testing the differences in images between her cameras and inserting the clips into her vlog (I think it was the day before the start of vlogmas). In one of the shots, you could see that Mount Torrid was back on her bathroom countertop. In another scene (maybe a different vlog), she puts the camera behind her shelf to show Twinkie sitting on the chair behind her. At the edge of the shot, you can see crud against the baseboard beside the chair. So with 3 pets and half-assed cleaning, I'm sure her allergies could be really bad. Anyway, back to the reeecap.]
Amber hates the words spore, and smear (and also moist). Amber thought she was sick, but it was just allergies. Amber hasn't been sick since she's been with Jade, you keyboard warriors (X to doubt)! So... that time she took the COVID test before mini-putt just didn't happen? OH, every time she thinks she's sick, it's just allergies from her cats (or, you know, cellulitis, UTIs, and MRSA if 'Annie Doran' is correct). During the lymphatic massage, the specialist noticed a cut on Amber's leg and mentioned it and the risk of cellulitis. The lipedema specialist told her that she could be the cleanest person, but if you have lipedema and you have a tiny cut and get normal every day bacteria, you can get cellulitis really easily - so I guess that makes this all okay?
Now Amber's rambling about how much they clean the apartment.
Location: Standing in Target.
Looking for more tat to decorate with. Amber shows a blanket pulled out from it's roll and messily shoved back on it's shelf. Amber asks why someone would do that and calls it 'disrespectful' - as if that wasn't HER 6-7 years ago when she and Destiny would treat Walmart as their playground. Intentional scenes where she sets up the camera and walks by it with a shopping cart to show she's not immobile.
She's looking at 'cute' water bottles and gold-painted pink weights. Amber used to be the jump rope queen - and inserts a clip of her in Krystal's garage jumping rope 200lbs ago.
Amber was just recognized!! They were so sweet. Of course, none of it was included in the vlog, as that would be CONTENT.
Christmas stuff. *touch touch touch touch*. Doesn't find what she was looking for.
Location: Standing in the kitchen.
HAUL TIME!! THUMBNAIL TIME (even though she decides to use the full body shot instead to get clicks - yet it's US who dehumanize her). She's DEVESTATED that she couldn't find the ordamints she wanted. Amber shows a box of red 'ordamints', plastic icicle ordamints, and a green velvety reindeer dust collector for a shelf. Rest of haul: Twinkie treats, Tic Tacs, car ordamint, Mini Fashion Toy Bubble, hideous green purse (her money her choice! Don't come for her!), tree topper (silver star), mens t-shirts for Jade, white Christmas tree dust collector, 'F' and 'B' stockings, and a letters to Santa mailbox dust collector.
Location: Standing in the office.
Decorating the office Christmas tree and office. Terrible camera angles. I don't know if it was the dress, or the camera angle making her belly looking extra bulbous, but at one point she looked like a Matryoshka doll. The tree topper looks like the dimensional key from the 'Masters of the Universe' movie when it lights up. Jade moved Amber's presents into the office to minimize Amber's need to walk, I guess?
YouTube Random Comment Picker.
Andrew P says "You're probably tired because you don't like, get up."
Amber thanks Andrew for the comment, but doesn't understand what he means.
Outro.
vlogmas day 3
