Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

Are you looking forward to seeing Jade's face on camera?

  • Yes

    Votes: 550 15.6%
  • No

    Votes: 349 9.9%
  • I don't care

    Votes: 2,620 74.5%

  • Total voters
    3,519
When tf will Hamber realize that no one gives af about her troon ass wiper gf and her massive 18 hour back piece tattoo tribute to Nike Jordans? Even Amber's "fans" don't give a fuck about the live-in feeder ass wiper assistant. No one knows her. The constant talking off-camera talking is so obnoxious and cringy. Also the constant "bebeeee" is giving Jan and Michael Scott in the worst possible way.
 
I missed you degenerates.
We missed you too
Me thinks she misses being a cunt to her partner and getting her way.
She 1000% misses this. She hates not being the matriarch of the household. Without the security she has of being "the best her current gf will ever get" she freaks out constantly that her partner will leave and she will have to actually get off her ass and do things.

Her face may not be AS moon shaped, but I swear she's as big as she was in 2019. 600 pounds when?
Yeah shes gaining again. That spoiled brat comment really got her oversized panties in a twist
 
TL;DR: The outcome of the meeting between the dietician and the surgeon has been delayed to 'next week' again. Many people (who don't exist) are telling Amber to go to another WLS.
What would she expect if she goes to another WLS surgeon? She already went to 3 others and I bet that they told her exactly the same thing. She is better off following the programme now.

Amber has a bunch of basic shit delievered that she could have bought from local stores if she wasn't bedbound.
Instead of buying rubbish, Amber should start to save for any skin removal surgery. It will cost her at least $50k and none of it will be paid by insurance.

Amber confirms it's not her trying to protect Jade, but Jade who refuses to be on camera (to Amber's disappointment).
I do not blame Jade on this one.
 
She calls a parcel a "partial", and no one mentions it. What the fuck?
I knew girls in high school that acted dumb because they thought it was what guys liked. I think most women that get this in their head snap out of it at some point in college/ early 20s. I refuse to believe that this shit is not an act, however to what end? To present oneself as a retarded teenager? No one finds that shit attractive, platonic or romantic. Combine that with sitting in her own shit and piss, not being able to leave the house, and having the interests of a lobotomy patient, and I have to wonder what Jade hopes to get out of it.
Or she is that stupid.
Little of column A and B? Everyone reacting to her is way too nice.
 
Or she is that stupid.
Little of column A and B? Everyone reacting to her is way too nice.
I tend to believe that she both is playing a little bit stupid, but also, she is actually stupid as well. She's stupid enough to not understand how stupid she is, to not even be able to conceive of the gap in intellectual capacity that exists between her and someone genuinely smart. She's just barely smart enough to be able to blend in for the most part, at least among the kinds of people she would surround herself with/would tolerate her presence long enough to have a conversation, so she sees herself as a perfectly smort gorl. And she has no frame of reference for anything more than that, so it never even occurs to her how short she falls of the mark.

I mean, it must be a nice place to be: not just stupid, but too stupid to know the difference. But goddamn she is one dumb, fat bitch.
 
Or she is that stupid.
I used to think it was just an act, like her Cali Valley Girl quirky bullshit. But years have passed and it's only gotten worse, not better. And along the way, there's been many sad reveals of how utterly stupid she really is. She's not stupid to retard degree, but she IS stupid and uneducated to the 9th degree and sluffs it off to one of as many self-diagnosed afflictions. My OCD, my BED, my lipodema, my mentulz.... pick one.

It's her, it's who she is, and somehow up to now, she's made a fantastic living off of it.

It's changing. Peeps could tolerate seeing a fat whale in Toxic Lake or Shamuing in a backyard kiddie pool. Dat shit was funny and I, as well as many of youse gorls laughed our asses off over it, just like watch me waddle to the tree and my phone go skeet-skeet-skeet.

Those days of funny are gone. Now we're watching a boring heffalump, in all her stupidity, try to maintain relevance and income with total nonsense.

I've given up on the clickbait bullshit, only read what's summarized here and somewhere, somewhere in the distance, I hear the fag Muppet screaming....

"NOBODY CARES!"
 
She's desperate, but not desperate enough, I think. Surely she can see that her views are tanking, she can't even get to 50k views anymore, and yet for some reason she's still doing the same boring bullshit of "watch me sit down and talk and maybe show my food or open another package of useless plastic for approximately ten minutes".

Your currently lifestyle ain't gonna last much longer if you keep this up fatty, better pull out another circus show from your bag of tricks.

I know this sounds repetitive but we're all seeing her view counts get lower and lower, and we're all seeing the content somehow get more and more boring.

WHERE'S DAT LAYG REVEAL.
 
She has become more and more desperate for people to send her things these past few months. She must be strapped for cash but is still begging people to send her shit because she NEEDS her instant gratification at the expense of whoever the fuck.

They buy so much meat and I've noticed that it always goes in the fridge, not the freezer. Are these two fatties really gorging on 8+ packages of various meat within the span of a week? Even when she does a somewhat "healthy" grocery haul, it is always enough to feed a family of at least 5 linebackers.

Gaycare era maxi dress:
maxi 3 years ago.PNG
wipey era:
maxi now.PNG
Idk much about fat anatomy but it seems like she is 2019 fat but the elasticity of her shelf ass has drooped, just like all other parts of her skin.

ALSO WHICH ONE OF YOU SENT HER INFINITE JEST LMFAO
 
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ALSO WHICH ONE OF YOU SENT HER INFINITE JEST LMFAO
I didn't know what it was, but here's some tidbits found immediately after googling the book:
- Infinite Jest is a postmodern encyclopedic novel, famous for its length, detail and digressions involving 388 endnotes, some of which themselves have footnotes.

- It's typically regarded as difficult reading, due partly to its narrative structure, but mostly because of its length. Infinite Jest is 1,079 pages long, making it not ideal for subway reading but extremely effective as an emergency doorstop.

- That is not to say that “Infinite Jest” is a comforting book in any way. In fact, it's oftentimes highly disturbing. Nearly every sensitive topic — including animal abuse, sexual abuse, death and addiction — is contained within those pages.

- At more than 1,000 pages – with copious footnotes – Infinite Jest is a famously difficult read. It is the Gen-X Ulysses that even those like me, who consider themselves DFW superfans, are nervous to attempt, many preferring to feed their devotion with his essays and short stories.

So I'll say it too - which one of you did it!

ETA: Those quotes aren't by me, they were found on page 1 of a Google search for the book's title. Wonder if it's gonna show up in a future video where Hamber claims she "just doesn't vibe" with it.
 
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Dirty looking beast. Jesus Christ. Absolutely abominable, especially in that pink tent. She can't put in any consistent effort towards her wretched appearance.
Not her fucking pronunciation of ''groSHeries''. Please.

Talking in third person again, you sound like a twat.
''I have a friend who is constantly asking what perfume''. D O U B T. I find it hard to believe you could even smell Hamber's perfume over her poor hygiene stench.

''I hate offending people''. You're a silly cunt.
''I grew up with nothing''. You're a self pitying, spoiled cunt.
''There is something currently happening that I don't want to talk about''. You're an attention seeking cunt.
''I've put up a lot of walls''. You're a lying cunt.
''I get a little anxious''. You're a dramatic cunt.

I feel like Wipey wasn't doing her duties around the time this was filmed, she looks miserable and filthy. We all know she likes to stop ''taking care'' of herself to guilt her carers.
Nobody cares about your WLS journey that will never amount to anything.

Take a shower and brush your vile hair.
 
Idk much about fat anatomy but it seems like she is 2019 fat but the elasticity of her shelf ass has drooped, just like all other parts of her skin.
I suspect it’s just a difference in material. The gaycare era dress looks like polyester doubleknit or some stretchy fabric that is maxed out over her “curves”
The new dress looks like rayon or something that has more drape to it. May skim over the shelf ass, but all it does is make her stomach look huge.
 
Plot Summary with Commentary. Not a reeeecap (damnit, where are you with the reeeecaps, @Diet Coke 4 Life and @Situation Type Deal Gorl ?!)

Today is a no makeup type of day. Today is a didn't brush her hair type of day.... so I guess just your typical day that ends in a Y?

PO BOX TIME!!! Pre-biotic fibre supplement (as her audience knows she's full of shit), and the book "Infinite Jest". Ooh, a reference manual for Amber so she can invent a more believable 'traumatic' backstory.

GROCERY HAUL: It's the typical "look I'm being healthy" haul that she always buys, then lets rot in the fridge while she orders her DoorDash. Lots of meat, as well as processed meat (that I thought she said she wasn't going to eat any more).

Oh good, MANWICH sauce. A staple item in a healthy, low sodium diet. HA! She makes a 'recipe' with it using broccoli & cheese sauce and loaded potato bake. Dietician approved, I'm sure.

--NEXT DAY--

Torrid try-on of pink maxi dress for desperation clicks, as her current video view counts are so low, they're almost sub-terranean. My critique: YIKES!! - I suspect she's lying about her diet compliance (if the manwich and cheese potato bake didn't already give that away).

"FREE THE NIPPLE". (Bad Dr Evil impression) Mmmm, how about NO?! Also, what terrible genetics you have that you can get to over 500lbs, get so fat that your EARLOBES and FOREHEAD chunk out, yet NONE of it goes into your tits? Amber IS a medical mystery!

Also... what a FUCKING MESS. Every time she films at any angle other than right in her face from the neck up, you just see crap everywhere. Plastic storage shelves, piles of crap, and trash on the floor. Clean up your sty before you press the record button.

"The highest size at Torrid in challis fabric used to not fit me, but now it does... perfectly". So... Torrid increased their vanity sizes, again? We have EYES; we can see your midsection is larger than it was in late 2018-early 2019.

--UPDATE--

The dress was too big for her ... yeah, because it FIT! It's sausage casings or NOTHING for Ambo. OR - hear me out here - you can spend a few dollars and get it hemmed so you don't trip on the length? Maybe she won't drop it off at the local Dry Cleaners because she's afraid that she'll return for it to find that the Seamstress misunderstood and converted it into a tent.

-- NEXT DAY --

AMAZON UNBOXING: These two boxes were supposed to come with her MASSIVE AMAZON HAUL that she unboxed in her last video, but were late: Perfume that looks like a chocolate bar (of course), and bodyspray.

Now, I've had Amazon break up orders of mine and send them in stupid ways. One time I ordered 5 different cables (with connectors that just aren't sold in stores here anymore) with some other small stuff, and the order arrived in 3 packages over the course of two days when it should have all been put in one big bubble mailer. When you order uncommon stuff like those cables (or books whose last print run was 25 years ago), your order gets messed up because Amazon likely only has that item in a small box in ONE WAREHOUSE across all of North America. Amber's orders are all of common, current items which should be in EVERY warehouse and shouldn't be split like she's claiming. I'm guessing she orders items daily and just leaves it in a pile until she needs video filler - like she did with those kitchen towels two videos ago.

Amber slows a clip of her ridiculous perfume collection from when she was mooching off of Krystal's parents.

Amber doesn't care about expensive jewellry - it's quantity over quality! Regarding the people who "pocket watch": Don't!! Her money, her business! We'll remember that the next time you cry about not having money.

--NEXT DAY--

WLS UPDATE: She's done getting into the nitty-gritty (as her audience can tell when she's talking bullshit). Stuff is going on that she doesn't want to get into. Scheduled appointment to meet with the team - including the surgeon (date not given).

Amber complains that they wanted her to go a year without (air quotes) "binging". She asks 'What is binging?' She's concerned that every healthcare provider sees it as something different. No, you have tried for YEARS to convince heathcare providers that you have it by trying to twist your alleged behaviour around whatever shit you found online.

In response to Amber's concerns: If only there was some main source that healthcare providers could refer to in order for there to be consistency! Almost like, a large book (that can be revised as necessary) that contains DIAGNOSIC criteria and STATISTICAL information of various disorders. You know, almost like a MANUAL of sorts for MENTAL DISORDERS. Hmmm....

FREEZE FRAME!!
freezeframe.png


This entire section is just mindless babbling:

Amber wants to get the binge eating saga over with, because it's no longer convenient for her.

Again Amber mentions that there are personal things going on that she doesn't want to talk about.

She admits she's been behind in videos. When she's behind in videos, it means she's doing her job (I dunno; she flaps her gums, I type).

QUESTION OF THE DAY: "How many times a week do you leave the house?" Answer: Amber leaves daily for things like walking Twinkie, and 5 times per week in the car for errands... she just doesn't film it because filming for YouTube (her job that she loves) gives her anxiety.

TL;DR: Amber has an appointment with the WLS, but doesn't tell us when. Amber wants 'the binge eating saga over with', because it's causing her stress (read: is no longer convenient for her, and is showing what a narcissitic POS she is). Grocery haul, more Amazon unboxings, PO Box unboxings. Stuff is going on that she doesn't want to talk about. Full body shot of braless Amber in hideous maxi dress for desperation clicks.
 
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