Amberlynn Reid - 600 pound pathological liar and U-Haul lesbian moving in with her next live-in maid/nurse/girlfriend.

Are you looking forward to seeing Jade's face on camera?

  • Yes

    Votes: 550 15.6%
  • No

    Votes: 349 9.9%
  • I don't care

    Votes: 2,620 74.5%

  • Total voters
    3,519
Plot Summary with Commentary. New "Day 1"? Sounds like the dietician (or the surgeon?) chewed Amber out for no measurable progress on her WLS journey. Let's GO!!!!!!!!!!

If it looks like she's been crying, it's because she has been. Bad lighting, blah blah. Typical Amber intro.

She LOVES YouTube. She LOVES vloging. It's the most stressful job she's ever had...

... you know, because it's really the ONLY job she's ever had. You know, other than sitting on her ass and helping with food service when she worked for a few months at the assisted living home. Or those few months at the 'government job' of data entry, where she spent more time hiding in the bathroom than actually doing her job.

"That includes 6 days a week, for 10 hours a day doing data entry, ... that's from working at the assisted living facility.... The Boys and Girls club.. I've had my fair share of jobs"

Yeah... that's ALL the jobs she's had. Also, the Boys & Girls Club? That's a new one. Whadya wanna bet that she WENT to the Boys & Girls club during her foster care years, and is somehow counting that as 'work experience'. She also admitted long ago that she wasn't working anywhere near those 10 hours/day at both the assisted living facility or the data center. She admitted that the 10 hours included driving to work and back (Dusty did all of the driving), as well as waiting in line with everyone else at the guard gate to get into the parking lot. And don't forget she was only part-time at the assisted living home. She just WENT full time to keep an eye on Dusty. Amber was worried that Dusty would cheat on her with one of the staff... or one of the residents, knowing what a degenerate fuck the Dustbuster is.

Amber claims that her YT job is harder because working outside of the home is an 'escape', and it's harder to work in the house. Okay, SO GO VLOG SHIT OUTSIDE OF THE HOUSE. Do yourself AND EVERYONE ELSE a favour - we'll be happy to never see your dirty apartment ever again.

Amber complains that she's always working 24/7. Sounds like Amber needs a new job - I mean she's obviously shit at this one to be producing this level of nontent after supposedly putting in 168 hours/week.

LOL, "Maintaining my online appearance". You mean, when you get into internet slap-fights with randos on instagram?! HAHAHA!

BIG BOWL OF FOOD!!! Not FOOD-TOK, MUSTARD-TOK. Cottage cheese, chicken sausages, and raw veggies (like asparagus) with mustard. Eating like a savage while groaning for clicks. Despite the lack of potato-choking action, this is still disgusting. [SKIP]

JUMPCUT! Day Two of "The Urge to Purge". She TOTALLY doesn't want to buy new clothes, she just wants less of everything. I Don't care. [SKIP]

JUMPCUT!!! MORE FOOD!! Tutorial on how to clean strawberries with water and baking soda. The raspberries went moldy from sitting in the fridge. Amber cooks chicken ... something. Again, I don't care [SKIP]

JUMPCUT!! Sitting on the couch again. Amber created another new weight loss plan for herself. Amber doesn't want to talk about WLS right now as she needs to 'process', and this is a 'boundary' she's set for herself. TRANSLATION: Amber got chewed out for yet another month of no progress, and their response to her being approved for surgery was "LOL NO!!"

SO MANY imaginary people have been messaging Amber, telling her that they were drug addicts and their addictions transferred to food, and how it's SO MUCH HARDER TO BE A FOOD ADDICT THAN A DRUG ADDICT.

AMBER'S EPIPHANY - "You can't stop eating food, but you can stop eating JUNK". Exactly what EVERYONE has been telling her for the last 9 and a half years.

When she eats healthy foods, she doesn't even finish it because it's so filling and it's the right nutrition....

... I guess we're all supposed to forget how she said that every bite of healthy food makes her think about and want to eat junk food?

She needs to increase her water intake, because her water intake has been terrible "recently".

Cleaning doesn't count as exercise anymore ... which doesn't matter, as Amber doesn't exercise nor clean.

No cheat meals, because they trigger her to binge trigger her addiction and make her relapse.

JUMPCUT!! PO Box Time. Want to send her anything? Send it soon, because she's not sure if she's gonna renew the PO box. She wants to protect the little bit of faith she has in humanity. TRANSLATION: her fans are sending her too many Ho-Hos and dildos - which I guess is totally not good video content for Amber (but would be GREAT for us).

Amber got: a painted rock, shitty earrings, sushi making kit (which Amber probably bought for herself), and soy wax melts (don't eat them, Amber).

Byee!

TL;DR: CUNTENT!!! Amber moans about how stressful it is being a YouTuber. She works 24/7 for YouTube. Amber 'taste-tests' (eats) veggies, cottage cheese, and mustard like a savage on camera for desperation clicks. Amber sorts half a dozen clothing items. Amber doesn't want to talk about the WLS process (as that's a 'boundary' she's set), but she has created her own brand-new diet and fitness plan: Intermittent fasting 16/8 with 2000 calories/day of ONLY HULTHY food, with walkeeen and danceeen for exercise.

Amber didn't SAY this, but I'm gonna call it now:
RIP WLS Journey #4, November 2022 - June 2023
 
Last edited:
"Intermittent fasting 16/8 with 2000 calories/day of ONLY HULTHY food, with walkeeen and danceeen for exercise."

That "plan" didn't last 3 hours before this 600 pound bag of stink and scabs was shoving garbage in her rotting mouth-hole and filming more bullshit for YouTube.

What an utter waste of oxygen.
 
The way she discards her clothes is just so trashy. The vile swine doesn't bother to wash or even fold them. She just throws them on her lint-infested carpet where they will inevitably be shoved into a garbage bag and put on the curb of a Goodwill.

Her idea of intermittent fasting is the same as Gunt's Ramadan strategy - binge eat your entire fridge and sleep for 16 hours.

She looks so sick and jaundicy she resembles the germ from the mucinex commercial more and more everyday.
 
Amber always tells us a good story about a new diet and exercise. The question is how long will she stick to it. My guess is till the weekend. She will have the same success as Chantal’s 40 days of water fast.

She probably went to the clinic on Monday and was told to lose 50-100 pounds before even considering wls. Now, she is trying to lose the weight, but we all know how this will turn out. She will tell us it was her decision not to get wls as it was her decision not to get married.
 
She didn't get denied because she wasn't in a program. She finally ran out of story line for her WLS arc.

The imaginary therapist was to buy time while trauma dumping on her audience. She even stretched out the last couple "sessions" when she still hadn't come up with a story to get out of it.

Now we get "I have to have time to come up with a new lie process my decision*" before telling her audience what happened.

Retarded, lying, brat.

ETA: * Also has to make sure that decision she makes up absolves her of any fault or responsibility.
 
I wasn't buying the lengthy emails from any health care provider. If the allegedly totes real therapist expressed pride, it might have been in terms of "wow, look at allll your progress! from fatty fat fat fat to fatty fat fat fat lite! so much progress! maybe more than people we are ACTUALLY willing to operate on. Which is not you. Ever. Bye!"

Back to calorie "counting" and "exercise". Never change.
 
Back to calorie "counting" and "exercise". Never change.
And then back to Weight Watchers, then to calorie counting, then to Noom, then to calorie counting, then to Weight Watchers because Jenny Craig filed for bankruptcy... The cycle is so predictable it's not funny.
 
Judging by her track record, I don't believe she made up the whole thing. It doesn't explain away her being in the office and stuff either. What I'm guessing happened is she got set up with the right people and after she cried about needing to see a year's worth of consistent progress in order to be approved for surgery, they broke it down and told her to start off with therapy and they'd see how her weight loss went from there. Like always, she then lied about how it was going and how impressed her nutritionist was with her despite her total lack of progress since starting the program. As a result I'm guessing they either booted her from the program Dr. Now thug life style or they told her that she has to start from square one and now she's back to the cycle.
 
Intermittent fasting 16/8 with 2000 calories/day of ONLY HULTHY food,
So Amber is going to try to eat like 90% of the working world. Coffee for breakfast, a quick lunch while at work, and dinner when they get home? Does she not realize most people dont eat for 16 hours at a time already?
Dinner at 7pm. ..night chores and tv etc with the family, wake up at 6 am (11 hours later) have a cup or two of black coffee...work..lunch at 11 or 12... so 16 hours of fasting... then lunch and dinner within 8 hours of each other.
 
Judging by her track record, I don't believe she made up the whole thing. It doesn't explain away her being in the office and stuff either. What I'm guessing happened is she got set up with the right people and after she cried about needing to see a year's worth of consistent progress in order to be approved for surgery, they broke it down and told her to start off with therapy and they'd see how her weight loss went from there.
We know she went to the initial session, where she played with her phone the whole time. It is likely that she started therapy as you described. She was counting the sessions.

Like always, she then lied about how it was going and how impressed her nutritionist was with her despite her total lack of progress since starting the program. As a result I'm guessing they either booted her from the program Dr. Now thug life style or they told her that she has to start from square one and now she's back to the cycle.
I do not believe all this nonsense with the dietitian, being proud of her for failing to lose weight. This is not the type of discussion that would come from a medical professional. I think she was told that she was not ready and would need to continue therapy and to lose xxx amount of weight before even being considered. She was probably told to get her sleep apnea tested which is why she is “processing “ what she needs to do next.
 
That is such a grotesque thumbnail. Out of all her gross thumbnails (that YT picks for her, of course) this has gotta be in the top five for offputtingness.

Makes ya really wanna dive in there and find out why she's anacondaing that poor broccoli, doesn't it?

Yeah, no

Braver souls than mine, dear Kiwis, braver souls than mine
 
Back