Soren
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Jul 23, 2014
I have no idea why, but this triggered in me a mental image of all this thing as a wildlife documentary.
"This is the Dobson, one of the many subspecies of lolcow that inhabit the wild plains DeviantArt. This is a very cowardly creature, which retreats at the slightest sign of danger. We have to be careful when gathering our footage, for even the slightest amount of discordance is enough to alert him.
...
Because his diet consists mostly of attention, the blue bear has to venture himself into dangerous territories, where he is vulnerable to the attacks of dissenting opinions, in order to survive. He has to pick his fights carefully; a sufficiently strong blow from an internet commenter can seriously injure his ego.
...
An opportunity appears. A jab at the gamergate movement! Starving for attention, Dobson is unable to resist it's siren's call. In a fit of boldness, he attacks it with all of his condescending might!
...
But it did not go so well for the bear this time. He completely misses the point, and now, he is exposed to the relentless attack of people telling him he's wrong!
...
He makes a mad dash to save face, posting another comic to shield himself. But the clumsy measure only further intensifies the assault, and Dobson gets stinged innumerous times. It is a desperate situation. And here is where the blue bear shows a magnificent defense mechanism.
...
Desperate situations call for desperate actions. The blue bear shuts off his comment section, protecting himself from further damage in his posterior. With his supply of drama secured, he retreats to the safety of his circlejerk, where he is protected by the white knights.
...
But it will not take long, before he has to hunt for attention again."
...
Because his diet consists mostly of attention, the blue bear has to venture himself into dangerous territories, where he is vulnerable to the attacks of dissenting opinions, in order to survive. He has to pick his fights carefully; a sufficiently strong blow from an internet commenter can seriously injure his ego.
...
An opportunity appears. A jab at the gamergate movement! Starving for attention, Dobson is unable to resist it's siren's call. In a fit of boldness, he attacks it with all of his condescending might!
...
But it did not go so well for the bear this time. He completely misses the point, and now, he is exposed to the relentless attack of people telling him he's wrong!
...
He makes a mad dash to save face, posting another comic to shield himself. But the clumsy measure only further intensifies the assault, and Dobson gets stinged innumerous times. It is a desperate situation. And here is where the blue bear shows a magnificent defense mechanism.
...
Desperate situations call for desperate actions. The blue bear shuts off his comment section, protecting himself from further damage in his posterior. With his supply of drama secured, he retreats to the safety of his circlejerk, where he is protected by the white knights.
...
But it will not take long, before he has to hunt for attention again."
