Apples

[Orion Balls]

Scenario: You're given a truck bed filled with Red Delicious apples, and are responsible for getting rid of them. They are packaged in 5lb bags, no bad apples in any bunch. They were originally intended for a community giveaway that had almost zero turnout. Because they are donated, they will probably be bad within a week, unless stored properly. What do you do with all them apples?

 

[TFT-A9]

Well, they're Red Delicious, so they're shit for cooking or saucing.

Give them to pig farms, since no one else wants them.

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

I mean, I like Red Delicious, but not THAT much.

PS: this brings me back to The Biggest Problem in the Universe.
I miss those days.

 

[NIGGER ASS PEE POOPY RAPE]

if I lived somewhere very cold I'd bury all of them in the snow and feast on them for years. if I lived in a big city I'd build an apple cannon to kill niggers with. if I lived in or near a nice town I'd sell them at a farmer's market.

 

[Forgetful Kiwi]

Asking for a friend?
I would plant them in the ground and hope some of them grows to a tree.

 

[TFT-A9]

Asking for a friend?
I would plant them in the ground and hope some of them grows to a tree.

IIRC most apple trees are grafted - they use a hardy rootstock and graft the fruit-bearing parts onto said rootstock. Trees that come from the Red Delicious' seeds will likely not be particularly hardy and will probably be decimated within a year by various shit.

 

[Forgetful Kiwi]

IIRC most apple trees are grafted - they use a hardy rootstock and graft the fruit-bearing parts onto said rootstock. Trees that come from the Red Delicious' seeds will likely not be particularly hardy and will probably be decimated within a year by various shit.

That's why I hope they grow. If not then they will just become food for the worms.

 

[Orion Balls]

Well, they're Red Delicious, so they're shit for cooking or saucing.

Give them to pig farms, since no one else wants them.

I agree that they're crap for baking and cooking down.

 

[Reshiram Battle.mp3]

mass compost, use result to fertilize better apple varieties. the weak shall die for the strong

 

[The Last Stand]

Make applesauce.

 

[JSGOTI]

The overarching issue is that they're Red Delicious.
So even if you use them to make apple cider, you would have to purchase another apple to get a more enjoyable flavor profile.
Truthfully, best option would be to either make liquor with them, or to store them until apple season and then use them to fill out cider production and cut down on the costs associated.

Or, just make cider with them and use that cider exclusively for cider donuts, as the flavor isn't nearly as important at that point.

 

[Suburban Bastard]

You eat them

 

[TFT-A9]

You eat them

I'm pretty sure I've seen this cartoon somewhere.

 

[Red Hood]

Is this a Voight-Kampff question?

 

[Robert James]

Depends.
If you're in a big enough city try to sell them at the farmers market as organic and fresh picked.
If you are in a city with homeless, just hand out the bags to pan handlers or the homeless directly.
If you're in the country find a farm to donate them or sell them to
If you want to avoid all human contact eat some, compost some and try to bake some in interesting never thought of ways.

 

[beautiful person]

If they were Honey Crisps, I'd actually bother with eating and saving some for myself and then having the rest trucked to a food pantry or homeless shelter.

Since they're Red Delicious, I'd just have them dumped out in the yard for the deer to eat.