That sounds fucking illegal and something the founders fought against, but Bob, hating AmeriKKKa, shouldn't have a problem.
Uhm axshoewlee the Constitution forbids the government forcing you to house soldiers. That's why this is OK and giant tech companies can spy on you for the government.
Sorta joking aside, they are only asking for people to finally put their money where their mouth is and house an illegal alien. The government can ask that as long as there's no cohersion or quid pro quo. It's no different from them asking you to not claim deductibles on your taxes and you'd be just as stupid to agree to that as the former.
"Because you demand it!" Who?
(29 minutes long)
TWILIGHT SAGA - COMPLETE
The opener of his newest reheated bullshit.
Oops! My bad! It's not reheated bullshit. Bob rediscovered audio from his original review of, and we have to put it in quotes, "BREAKING DAWN: PART 2"! THIS IS JUST LIKE WHEN THEY FOUND ALL THOSE LOST STUDIO SESSIONS OF THE BEATLES! OH MY GAWD HE ALSO RETAINS THE RIGHT TO ADD IN EXTRA COMENTARY AT THE END OF THE VIDEO I'M GONNA SHOOT MYSELF FROM ALL THE EXCITEMENT!
At the end of every review, save for the very last one, he adds in "present-day context". His first addition of "present-day context"
uh so yeah a compilation of the uh the Twilight reviews why did this take so long to get up uh well for a while two reasons one for a long time I thought, sincerely, that this was going to end up being uh one of the uh well four rather four or five of the you know classic quote-unquote reviews that we were gonna have to go back and really like explain and do a lot of "hey it was a different time" stuff about more so than there actually was uh because really like shitting on Twilight in...aggressively negative ways was basically a pastime for internet critics back in
the day when I started out. I'm pretty sure that this was the first review that uh went up. This was before Escape to the Movies had branding. This was originally posted like tagged onto the end of an early early video on uh the old site as like a tryout thing for "hey we're thinking that this guy should be a film critic on the website. What do you think guys?" and it's not so much that I disagree with my own opinion retroactively of the Twilight movies, they're garbage, I'm not a fan of the books, I'm not a fan of the style, I'm not a fan of the the message, the subtextual philosophy/ideology within them, I don't still don't think Stephanie Meyer particularly great writer not a fan of you know as uh YA authors go you know being a less shitty person than JK Rowling is kind of a low bar to jump over, you know so I remain no longer the biggest biggest fan of the style that I'm working from in this first review, in this original Twilight review, uh where it's 90 negativity and dialed up how many angry things can be said about the cast about the characters about the material in the nastiest way, this very early YouTube style uh but the view went under it? I more or less stand behind there's a couple jokes and references out because not the way that I would speak about a working actor today talking about Robert Patterson's uh you know physical appearance putting on this resentful reviewer Persona of threatened by male actors that women find more attractive than you think that it's just not funny to me anymore but overall I thought uh looking back remembering the sort of things that uh were just commonplace in uh humor parlance for uh dorky white men like myself duet throw into a a comedy bit even in a review context about the Twilight movies there was a lot lot less that gave me pause than I would have remembered uh not to say that I went easy on it but that I was a lot less of an asshole about this than I remember so not not something that I would still consider my finest work but still a time capsule and as such uh made me think well you know I may as well put all of these together uh one thing to uh prepare yourselves for is that the other reason that this took so long to get together we never were able to recover a good video copy of the original version of the Breaking Dawn Part 2 uh review that seems to be lost to Internet history thanks to uh poor archiving on my part, poor archiving on the part of the original website that ran these uh what I was able to recover was the original audio that I recorded which I restored added to a new edit of Clips on top of that so you have your uh the audio of that with a new visual arrangement to get onto the end of this so that you can hear I did think of Breaking Dawn Part 2 normally I would just leave off a missing uh video from a compilation like this with an explanation of that but as I remembered the payoff to this and the sort of turnaround that I had on the final installment of The Twilight Saga is what made a compilation worth doing in the first place so I wanted to get it on there in some form but now having watched the first of these here is New Moon
The "present-day context", which I will keep using in quotes because that's HIS wording for it, for the first review is his apologizing like a fucking cuck for an offense that offended nobody. You see Lindsay and/or Monica, Bob's not like those other CHUDs! Bob learns from his mistakes. Bob knows that toxic masculinity has no place in current year. Bob also takes any opportunity to take a swing at JK Rowling no matter how ham fisted it is.
The first bit that I highlighted was him saying that him being intimidated by Robert Paterson being hunky was just an act,yo. A prank, if you will. I seem to remember him having an issue with Matt Damon's training sequence in BvS which only exists to show off his hunkiness. Bob will have to apologize for that in 10 years too, assuming he lives that long.
The second bit is him, again, alleging that he has help with his vids all while crediting no one. Does Bob have his own discord with Arkle, MOS, Ryan Whoreton, Lass Library, Timur, and many others? Do they keep it quiet out of embarrassment or so they don't have to keep banning TeamImpossible alts? Who can say?
The last bit is admitting that the line in the description about there being new audio for the Breaking Dawn Part 2 review is either a lie or that he cannot form proper and understandable sentences. Either possibility is just as likely.
The second "present-day context" for New Moon starts off with a banger!
Yeah I think I did not mention in the follow-up modern audio from the last part that uh one thing that I did get, uh, get wrong at the time, which I have to own, I think there's a few instances throughout this where we were still referring to the indigenous characters in the series, uh as, uh Indian rather than Native Americans or indigenous peoples and uh that's not cool generally not something that I would be uh not not how I'd be using that phraseology today. Obviously in hindsight it's easy to look back on this one, this whole franchise in general and recognize that uh you know a lot of you myself include straight up uh had it pegged wrong about uh Robert Pattinson clearly a better actor than this series gave him credit for, been good in many many other things, obviously no one needs to tell anyone that everyone everyone had Kristen Stewart completely misunderstood and uh misidentified from how good she is and uh what a complete night and day turn she has been as a dramatic actress comedy actress Etc post these films and into to the rest of her career sometimes you get these things wrong and that is a lesson uh but I stand by uh the overall appraisal that uh the franchise not very good.
"I called him an indian! That's like the red man's version of nigger!" AGAIN, Bob apologizes for offense when no one is offended. Nobody would've ever known about this had Bob not decided to republish his old shit as new shit. The original New Moon review is from July 22 of 2011.
In the over 12 years that this video has been out I have not heard nor seen any one confront Bob about his racism towards Native Americans because he called them Indians. He's such an embarrassing cuck that he needs to find shit to grovel about.
His bit about Patterson being *ahem* really that good is some interesting hindsight. If the better Bob was the same caliber of actor he is now but decided to live the rest of his life on Twilight residuals would Bob be bending over and asking for forgiveness for his take down of him? I'm also curious to know if at anytime during the Twilight movies if Bob was aware that the better Bob was purposefully tanking his role as Edward because he hated the character and the story? The reason it's difficult to tell if he's doing it on purpose is because he's second seat to Kristen Stewart who is shit in the movies. Kristen Stewart who Bob apologizes for mocking because she's such a great actress now and not that she came out as bisexual and played a lesbian researcher thing in Underwater. Bob admitting to being wrong is doubly funny because how many times have we seen him on Twitter proudly proclaim that he's right all the time?
The next bit of "present-day context" adds no "present-day context"
Yeah a lot less edits here in Eclipse... uh mainly because this this is when the franchise the middle ones are really when it just kind of started getting regular bad boring uh when we just sort of accepted okay this is now no longer a novelty this is a new thing it's part of the culture and it just sort of tell- it's still weird that David Slade did this one it doesn't feel even looking back like he's gone on to really refine himself as a a solid journeyman horror director and like what even is this from him. Bryce Dallas Howard obviously has gone on to be a much more interesting filmmaker much more interesting uh actress but uh now wanting to have the last of the uh the actual episodes.
This one is pretty boring which is funny because he chides Eclipse as being boring. The part where he mentions David Slade is a hard cut mid sentence to start this new idea about David Slade. Bob is breath takingly bad at what he does.
The last bit of "present-day context" is pretty much what you'd expect from Bob.
And yeah like I said that was the last of the real episodes uh the real reviews that I was able to recover of these uh there was a full Breaking Dawn part two video review uh have not been able to recover the original version of it. Did recover my original audio so what we've done is turn that into an approximation of its original format uh chopped out the recapping of the full plot of it because at this point who cares it's no longer a spoiler thing and got right to the meat of it which is why the finale makes it a uh a better thing and almost, almost redeems the series and laid some uh some fresh Clips over it with some some Distortion effect you know because that's what you have to do when uh using uh film clips on YouTube sometimes so uh let's see how that goes and here is uh the final review for the final part of uh breaking on part two. Hope you've enjoyed the compilation of Twilight review Clips thank you for watching the retro reviews. More new content coming soon to the channel.
lol
Like the prior bit there is no "present-day context" added. He does threaten us once again with new content. Not only did he not discover lost audio he actually cut shit out of it. We are getting a lesser product in everyway. Uh-mazing!
I am more and more convinced that all of this, and including his Marthabox retardation, is just him creating a memoir that doesn't actually require him to sit down and write. The only proof that Bob left the world to prove that he was here is his totally not a biography where he called the console wars his Vietnam and addendums/asides to videos he's already made.
![do_not_be_a_cnertied_cuck[1].jpg](http://uploads.kiwifarms.st/data/attachments/5252/5252266-092c18096ecd8de5f5c53d1810a1c9aa.jpg?hash=CSwYCW7Nje "do_not_be_a_cnertied_cuck[1].jpg")
