Cultcow Brad Watson / Richard Bradshaw Watson / Brad Watson_Miami - Jesus & Albert Einstein reincarnated, discoverer of GOD=7_4 Theory

How do you grade Brad Watson? This is an official poll that reflects the will of GOD.

  • Excellent A - Freedom from corporeal shackles and permitted audience with THE LORD.

    Votes: 168 13.6%
  • Passing B - Freedom from corporeal shackles and free attendance of GOD's Kingdom.

    Votes: 22 1.8%
  • Fair C - Freedom from corporeal shackles. Given limited, general attendance of GOD's Kingdom.

    Votes: 22 1.8%
  • Poor D - Reincarnated as Man to be given a second chance at attempting to earn GOD's graces.

    Votes: 39 3.2%
  • Fail F - Reincarnated as a non-human for 326 years, 221 days, and 14 hours.

    Votes: 76 6.2%
  • Fail F - Sentenced to eternal tortures in HELL for crimes against THE LORD GOD.

    Votes: 106 8.6%
  • Fail F - Forced to post on the kiwifarms.net for 24 years, 30 days, and 2 hours.

    Votes: 802 64.9%

  • Total voters
    1,235
He doesn't have a code of ethics. Otherwise he'd have to punish himself. Half of his punishments are for calling him an asshole which he repeatedly does to everyone else, only in code.
Matthew 5:22
King James Version (KJV)

22 But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say, 'Thou fool', shall be in danger of hell fire.

The Bible agrees with you, facepalm.

Anyhow, just thinking some more about Brad's empty, toothless threats of getting us all reincarnated as toads and hermit crabs.
He thinks the threat of us being reincarnated as non-human would frighten us, but ask yourself this: If you were a flatworm right now, would you be panicking and screaming about your condition? No, because you'd be a fucking flatworm and wouldn't have the intellectual capacity to be experience angst at your predicament.
It is almost the same thing as becoming nonexistent upon death. You don't experience suffering if you cease to exist, because you don't experience anything.
Being far enough down the evolutionary ladder would be indistinguishable, experience-wise, to not being able to think, feel or experience at all.
Even if he were to sentence us to "a hundred lifetimes as mouse" that wouldn't be too onerous, considering a mouse in the wild lives for around 3-4 months, a hundred lifetimes would add up to 33-40 years. A life that would be a short exciting, action-filled existence that I wouldn't even remember. Because my mouse brain would be too simple to record anything worth remembering.

So here's a gedanken (thought experiment) for you.
Lets think outside the box for a moment, and assume -- for the sake of this hypothetical mental exercise -- both Christianity and Hinduism are both wrong. There is no afterlife and no reincarnation. At all. When your brain dies, the "self" dissolves into the aether because there is no viable medium in which to instantiate it anymore.
Buuuuuut, Lets assume that the Transhumanist Singularity people are right, and within the next 50 years we are all able to transfer our consciousness into immortal cyborg transhuman bodies. The only way Brad could inflict his punishments on any of us would be to find each of us individually and forcefully transfer our consciousnesses out of our cyborg transhuman bodies (against our wills, mind you, which I'm very sure there would be laws against in the future) and forcefully transfer it into cyborg animal bodies.
I say we all make a pact if he tries that shit with any of us, we all gang up on him and forcefully transfer his consciousness into an immortal robotic Koi fish.
...a special very smart Koi fish that is just smart enough to comprehend how empty the life of a Koi fish is, but not smart enough to do anything about it.
...and this robotic Koi fish will live in a 30 gallon aquarium....a very narrow 30 gallon aquarium...so narrow that turning around would be difficult.
...and this aquarium is in an unlit room...in an anechoic chamber.
This way he experiences both an unfulfilling life of angst-filled, pointless ennui AND simulated nonexistence...simultaneously.

....and THAT, my friends, is how you existentially threaten someone by giving them immortality.
 
Personally I'm an Orthodox Christian (powerlevelling a bit), who enjoys drinking, music, and all the pleasures of life. But when I'm old and gray I don't want a cybernetic body, I want grandkids, and great-grandkids and then to just die. My Church has a weird teaching on the afterlife; the day the world ends is the day you die. That has always stuck with me. To be told "You will live 6,660 years as a nonhuman!" Is actually kind of funny, and to any Church Father the notion would be just as laughable. The ultimate goal of Christianity in my Church is the ressurection of the soul so as to become one with and join God. That you would be a plant, some kind of fungus, or a frolicking animal for a few thousand years actually contradicts the entire message of the Church, salvation is open to all - even those who reject Christ, and that you are ultimately only accountable to God - the Holy Trinity. Brad changes this by rejecting the Trinity, saying he is Jesus, and arbitrarily handing out judgements over disagreements. He's essentially the Aga Khan of 7_4 in that he's a charlatan who can come up with any law he wants and expects any and everyone to follow it or at least not question it. When we do he gets angry and says "Fuck you asshole" in numbers or tells us "I hope you will be a cow for 20,000 years or maybe a turtle". Then he spams his numbers game for a while and gets mocked. Rinse. Repeat. I think his girlfriend might convince him to tone it down or get him to take his meds, and I do believe he's a decent musician. I just think he gets OCD about 7 and 4 and reads too many conspiracy theories. He also wants to be the next Joseph Smith but isn't quite as good of an author.
 
It's 4:47 pm and the Miami Heat has 47 point74s at the half against Toronto while trying to win Game 7 and their 4th win.

GO Da Heat!

After turning to the golf during halftime, I turned back to the basketbol (17:20) and it was Toronto 74 Miami 58. We need a BIG comeback!

Toronto (7 letters) is god's holy city and was ordained by the heavens to defeat Miami (5 letters, not holy)

The Miami Heat went cold and the Toronto Raptors won their 4th game of the 7 game series. Congrats to them and good luck against Cleveland - they're gonna need it!

Brad is such an omnipotent and prophetic false god that he couldn't even use his own 7-4 theory to predict the outcome of a mere basketball game ahead of time. But where Brad failed, I succeeded. Bow before me, for my prophetic words rang true and have thus crowned me as the newly risen King (4 letters) ofKings (7 letters).

My first act as the latter day reincarnation of Jesus Caesar (aka Sergei Eisenstein) is to declare that all judgments hitherto passed by the false prophet Brad Watson Miami are henceforth NULLIFIED, NEGATED, REVERSED, VETOED, and CANCELLED.
 
You know who was a real dick to women? Einstein. Made his wife sign a contact with stipulations. Didn't bath often. Helped create one of the most destructive weapons in history. Might have been smart, sure, but that didn't mean he was a good person.

Jesus died a virgin. Supposedly fed a whole crowd of people with a few fish and some bread. Turned water into wine. Had his entire childhood skipped over in the Bible for some reason. Could have gone on saving lives if he didn't keep breaking the laws of man. Let's his own father convince him to sacrifice himself to pay for the sins of mankind; sinning still exists to this day.

Anybody, and I mean anybody, that happened to be an amalgamation of these two people (hilarious since there's no irrefutable proof that one of them even existed) would be the most conceited, self-centered, self-serving and woefully inept person. They would make a terrible teacher, a horrible friend, an awful partner and a pathetic, talent-less hack.

Good thing there's no one around like that, right?
 
Also let's not forget that Einstein fucked his cousin.
 
Personally I'm an Orthodox Christian (powerlevelling a bit), who enjoys drinking, music, and all the pleasures of life. But when I'm old and gray I don't want a cybernetic body, I want grandkids, and great-grandkids and then to just die.
The beauty of the Transhumanist philosophy is that you don't have to be immortal if you don't want to. When you want to "go" you can just "go"; and it is by your own will (rather than the fickle whim of your failing organs or shortened telomeres) that decide when your time is up.
In Christianity, you are immortal whether you want to be or not....and eternity is either a church service that never ends or a BDSM session that never ends....and it is somebody else that chooses which eternity you suffer.
CSMIndex.jpg

THIS ASSHOLE gets to choose where you go, Alex.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Jesus died a virgin. Could have gone on saving lives if he didn't keep breaking the laws of man.
....aaaand the Laws of God. His constant insistence on being God Incarnate broke Isaiah 43:11, which states that there IS NO MESSIAH.

Anybody, and I mean anybody, that happened to be an amalgamation of these two people (hilarious since there's no irrefutable proof that one of them even existed) would be the most conceited, self-centered, self-serving and woefully inept person. They would make a terrible teacher, a horrible friend, an awful partner and a pathetic, talent-less hack.
Oh, its worse than that. Remember he is also Benjamin Franklin (a doughy, fat, "air-bathing" creepy old man), Mohammad (a pedophile warlord who spawned a religion full of nihilist nutjobs), and Julius Caesar (an arrogant, militaristic tyrant who overthrew the democratic republic and replaced it with an absolutist dictatorship).
So far, Brad has ALL THOSE CHARACTER FLAWS but none of those peoples virtues.
 
Last edited:
I just announced I am going to gather 74 liters of piss and seek out Brad to dump it on him.
If his numbers game is right he will be pleased to be washed in such a holy amount of urine. if not then he is a false prophet.

It's all up to you now Brad
 
  • Winner
Reactions: Trombonista
LoudCustos3 / anonymous cow ard,

You'll be reincarnated as cows - nothing else - for a very looooooooooong time until you're born-again as human. Chew on that cud.

@millais,

Thanks for "King(4 letters) of Kings(7)".* I'd never thought of that and it's a BIG one!

Who loves ya, baby?! No really, who does love you?


*Synchronism: 11:22 "So your streaming algorithm..." - ESPN ad on ESPN 2
 
Last edited by a moderator:
@millais,

Thanks for "King(4 letters) of Kings(7)".* I'd never thought of that and it's a BIG one!

Who loves ya, baby?! No really, who does love you?


*Synchronism: 11:22 "So your streaming algorithm..." - ESPN ad on ESPN 2
That only works if you take out the space in "ofKings", which makes no sense whatsover.
And what kind of synchronism is that? No numbers, no Brads...I'm beginning to think that you're bad at prophecying.
LoudCustos3 / anonymous cow ard,

You'll be reincarnated as cows - nothing else - for a very looooooooooong time until you're born-again as human. Chew on that cud.
What would happen if cows went extinct at some point in the future?
 
@millais ,

I just added King(4) of Kings(7) to my book Plan-it Theory of GOD=7_4. You win a FREE copy! (Message me your email if you want it.)

@ChurchOfGodBear / anonymous cow ard,

Fuck you. I've got the best girlfriend in the world for almost 10 years. You dickweeds can say all sorts of stupid shit about me and some of it is hard to prove false, but not me having a girlfriend.

Tell the class about your lover and remember, inflatables do NOT count. And what kind of job do you have that allows you so much time here in a circle-jerk with other demon-possessed jerks?
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Back