Chris and drinking?

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Hodgepodge

kiwifarms.net
Joined
Oct 4, 2013
This is a topic that's always baffled me for a long time.

A couple years back I saw a video of Chris rambling about trolls or something while intoxicated. I didn't think much of it, assuming that it was just Chris being Chris.

I never really thought about it until now, but really, this is a pretty fascinating topic. I'm not really talking about Chris's big night out, but some of the later topics involving alcohol. For example, driving while intoxicated, spending time at a bar when he was still "free" to go and do shit...

Considering Chris's child-like ways, the idea of him drinking just fries my mind. We know how he got his first taste, right? Chris's big night out? But like, the progression of his interest in drinking and the development of unsafe and unhealthy habits is what really confuses me.

You guys have some pretty intricate discussions and theories on many topics, so I'd like to know what you think about Chris and drinking in general.
 
it seems like a lot of very childlike people say that they'll never-ever-ever start drinking or smoke marriage-you-wanna. then they grow up, realize DARE was lying, and smoke a bowl. I think chris was like that, honestly. plus his parents are probably both functioning alcoholics so that probably contributed to his hesitancy.
 
Chris's current age - 15 = Chris's emotional age.

At 20 (5): "Drinking and smoking is yucky. I want to blast all of the alcohol and tobacco to tha moon. Zoom!"

At 30 (15): "Maybe if I drink people will think I'm cool."


That's really all there is to it.
 
Ya know something, brother? Alcohol is (relatively) expensive and Chris is cheap when it comes to non-vidya spending, so it is unlikely he will spend all that much on alcohol.
 
It was due to that slut Jackie that Chris bought a bottle of Kahlua to drink on camera and mock Lars.

I'm sure later on he drank it tripping out at night seeing pink spheres.
 
Hulk Hogan said:
Ya know something, brother? Alcohol is (relatively) expensive and Chris is cheap when it comes to non-vidya spending, so it is unlikely he will spend all that much on alcohol.

I'm hoping for a moonshine saga
 
He'd be getting in touch with his roots if he started moonshinin'

Then he'd need to marry an underage girl and he'd be like his grandpa.
 
Hulk Hogan said:
Ya know something, brother? Alcohol is (relatively) expensive and Chris is cheap when it comes to non-vidya spending, so it is unlikely he will spend all that much on alcohol.

That thought never crossed my mind until just now.

Anyway

Judging by the Cwicki, it seems most of his time at bars was spent playing DSi. I have to wonder what that must have looked like, Chris just sitting at the bar hunched over his DSi, occasionally having a drink or two. But then, the idea of Chris driving drunk back home enters my head.

I have to wonder if he thought drinking alcohol would impress girls and that was the reason he started in the first place. (To look tough, manly, .....lol.)

That would explain a lot though, if he thought he was being more adult by deciding to drink because he was legally able to do so. Kinda like driving, I always imagined Chris took driving to the extreme when he first got his license because he wanted to look cool and find his heartsweet.
 
Hulk Hogan said:
Ya know something, brother? Alcohol is (relatively) expensive and Chris is cheap when it comes to non-vidya spending, so it is unlikely he will spend all that much on alcohol.
Pabst is dirt cheap and considering Chris has no real idea what a good (or even semi) decent beer would taste like it's perfect for him.
 
This post is a shoot.

I've got Assburgers and I'm emotionally and intellectually more mature than Chris.

I don't always drink, but when I do, I prefer Guinness. Even then, I only have one beer and with food. After that, it's water or tea. There's a reason why I've got better teeth than Chris. I've never had to have anything drilled or pulled. I've never even needed braces. I barely drink soda, unlike some man-children we know, which also helps.
 
Hodgepodge said:
Hulk Hogan said:
Ya know something, brother? Alcohol is (relatively) expensive and Chris is cheap when it comes to non-vidya spending, so it is unlikely he will spend all that much on alcohol.

That thought never crossed my mind until just now.

Anyway

Judging by the Cwicki, it seems most of his time at bars was spent playing DSi. I have to wonder what that must have looked like, Chris just sitting at the bar hunched over his DSi, occasionally having a drink or two. But then, the idea of Chris driving drunk back home enters my head.

I have to wonder if he thought drinking alcohol would impress girls and that was the reason he started in the first place. (To look tough, manly, .....lol.)

That would explain a lot though, if he thought he was being more adult by deciding to drink because he was legally able to do so. Kinda like driving, I always imagined Chris took driving to the extreme when he first got his license because he wanted to look cool and find his heartsweet.

His beer of choice is "bud". Given his weight and the fact that he thinks one bud is enough, I doubt he gets drunk at bars.
 
I think he felt both grown up and convinced he'd find his sweetheart when he'd occasionally go to the bar, as well as being social. The reality is he was thoroughly anti-social by playing his Nintendo DS and PSP, in the middle of the day. His beer of choice reflects his unwilling to spend money on non-vidya, as well as his ability to be easily influenced by ads.

It's also been mentioned he'd go to Applebee's sometimes for drinks, but I don't know if he was getting cocktails or beer. I do remember though that he told Jackie he thought the waitresses were his friends.
 
MysticMisty said:
I think he felt both grown up and convinced he'd fight his sweetheart when he'd occasionally go to the bar...
I'd imagine that would end poorly for him.
 
Your discussions have actually helped me make sense of this topic.

I guess drinking, going to the bar, etc. were just other examples of things he tried to do away from his home to make something for himself. (Like Fridays After Five, searching for his heartsweet and.....trying to make friends? Nah, hunting for china)
 
Coldgrip said:
MysticMisty said:
I think he felt both grown up and convinced he'd fight his sweetheart when he'd occasionally go to the bar...
I'd imagine that would end poorly for him.
God I come up with insane typos sometimes. Gave me a laugh though (also fixed it)!
 
Luscinia Hafez said:
This post is a shoot.

I've got Assburgers and I'm emotionally and intellectually more mature than Chris.

I don't always drink, but when I do, I prefer Guinness. Even then, I only have one beer and with food. After that, it's water or tea. There's a reason why I've got better teeth than Chris. I've never had to have anything drilled or pulled. I've never even needed braces. I barely drink soda, unlike some man-children we know, which also helps.

There are several people on this forum who are on the autism spectrum. No need to run down why you're better than Chris. Lets try to stay on topic.

OT: Chris' drinking was always one of his more peculiar habits to me. He spends so much time doing childish things that him drinking seems like such a stark contrast to everything else he does. I was unaware that he drives drunk. Thats cause for serious concern. He's dangerous enough behind the wheel sober.
 
In Chris's mind, Bar=offline socializing (this is correct)
However, in Chris's mind, offline socializing=playing on your current portable gaming device and waiting for cock hungry wealthy super models to approach you so you can get married and live happily ever after (this is incorrect)
 
Chris probably only drinks to seem more "adult." When he was seen drinking, he never seemed to like it. Goes down salty.
He always had this grimace on his face when dirnking. Even with something as sweet as Kahlua.
He probably only had a "bud" because that piss water beer is advertised everywhere, and we all know how Chris is with commercialism. At Applebees on that Faeryn date, he had a bright blue fruity drink, and had a long island iced tea because he probably thought it was a drink made with iced tea, even though it really isn't.
I highly doubt he'd stomach a strong beer or liquor not covered in sugar sweetness.
I don't think he really went out to drink, only only did it on those few occasions.
 
Lefty's Revenge said:
Luscinia Hafez said:
This post is a shoot.

I've got Assburgers and I'm emotionally and intellectually more mature than Chris.

I don't always drink, but when I do, I prefer Guinness. Even then, I only have one beer and with food. After that, it's water or tea. There's a reason why I've got better teeth than Chris. I've never had to have anything drilled or pulled. I've never even needed braces. I barely drink soda, unlike some man-children we know, which also helps.

There are several people on this forum who are on the autism spectrum. No need to run down why you're better than Chris. Lets try to stay on topic.

OT: Chris' drinking was always one of his more peculiar habits to me. He spends so much time doing childish things that him drinking seems like such a stark contrast to everything else he does. I was unaware that he drives drunk. Thats cause for serious concern. He's dangerous enough behind the wheel sober.
I don't think he ever has. Not unless he gets shit faced from one or two buds, which is unlikely.
 
Chris drinking is a good thing. If he's sitting in his house wasted one night, we might actually see some good content from him. I think the only way he'd ever make another video is if he was drunk enough that he'd taken leave of his senses.
 
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