Lovequest Chris and the Hooker

[Doctor Duke]

Chris got to stop obsessing about sex, good for him.

Hooker made some money with a partner who was clearly clean (of STDs) and no threat to her safety, good for her.

The stuff people argue over on here sometimes boggles my mind.

 

[BT 075]

The money stops being the Hardworking Taxpayer's™ once it hits Chris's account. If he were somehow given extra funds, specifically to buy hookers with, then that would be a misuse of welfare money. Do you really want a Bureau of Tugboat Morality to tell disabled people what they can and can't buy?

I find that the vast majority of people crying about Chris "abusing his Tugboat" are actually on welfare themselves. Hard-working taxpayers couldn't give two shits.

There's probably a shit ton of people far less deserving of the money then Chris. And I am glad for him to have gotten laid, because him not being a virgin pisses off so many assholes and it's astonishing to see how deeply in denial some people are over it.

 

[Lipitor]

The money stops being the Hardworking Taxpayer's™ once it hits Chris's account. If he were somehow given extra funds, specifically to buy hookers with, then that would be a misuse of welfare money. Do you really want a Bureau of Tugboat Morality to tell disabled people what they can and can't buy?

I mean I'm not saying we can control how he spends the money. Just saying most people would have a problem with that. I don't care one way or another. It's funny if he never gets laid and it's funny if out of desperation he sees a hooker.

Honestly it occurs to me now that it's actually pretty hilarious that Chris thinks he can show the trolls he's real man now cuz he lost his virginity to a hooker he paid for with welfare money. Like he can't hold down a job or attract a real woman, but this somehow is an accomplishment in man/adulthood. Also he fucking knew this and tried to not divulge in his facebook post that he lost it to a hooker and tried to make it seem like he had an actual relationship.

 

[DrChristianTroy]

And I am glad for him to have gotten laid, because him not being a virgin pisses off so many assholes and it's astonishing to see how deeply in denial some people are over it.

But... but... HE'S A CULTURAL VIRGIN!!!!!!!

 

[Stud2Stud]

The money stops being the Hardworking Taxpayer's™ once it hits Chris's account. If he were somehow given extra funds, specifically to buy hookers with, then that would be a misuse of welfare money. Do you really want a Bureau of Tugboat Morality to tell disabled people what they can and can't buy?

I concur, the money given to him by the state is his and he can do whatever he wants with it. However in the case of Chris spending said money incredibly unwisely it's certainly appropriate to criticise or mock him. That is: If he's using money on Lego and Makeup that he would direly need to pay for something vital (like rent or food), there should be no issue pointing out that Chris fucked up.
But saying stuff like "It's the tax payers money!" or "Look how Chris is wasting your money!" is stupid. It's not like the money would magically reappear in the 'taxpayers' pockets if Chris didn't spent it on frivolities.

There's probably a shit ton of people far less deserving of the money then Chris. And I am glad for him to have gotten laid, because him not being a virgin pisses off so many assholes and it's astonishing to see how deeply in denial some people are over it.

Fortunately, I missed out on all the 'Chris is culturally a virgin' bullshit... it's like they strive to challenge Chris' gold medal at mental gymnastics.

Honestly it occurs to me now that it's actually pretty hilarious that Chris thinks he can show the trolls he's real man now cuz he lost his virginity to a hooker he paid for with welfare money. Like he can't hold down a job or attract a real woman, but this somehow is an accomplishment in man/adulthood. Also he fucking knew this and tried to not divulge in his facebook post that he lost it to a hooker and tried to make it seem like he had an actual relationship.

Well, it certainly adds to his street cred. He had sex with a hooker who had done the weed. I bet in his little fantasyworld, that's a badass disregard for da rules.

 

[Ravenor]

The fact of the matter is this, the money he has spent on Sex (not toy's) is a drop in the ociean to what the American Tax payer is going to have to pay to fund Chris for the rest of his life.

Did he fuck a hooker? Yep.
Was it legal for him to pay for Sex? No.
Is it the best he can ever hope for? Yep.
Do I really care if he payed for Sex? Nope not really(if what we know is accurate).

Do I want him to pay for it again.... NO, NEVER.
Do I want him to never have sex again... yes.

The last two are the ones that give me pause.
In countries where prostitution is illegal your more likely to end up supporting Sex trafficking (a genuinely reprehensible crime, I donate a fair portion of my income to a charity fighing it an supporting victims of it) so if this became a regular thing for him like once every 6 months (the most I think he would be willing to pay for and what his libido would allow). My reasoning is, I don't want Chris hurting anyone but I don't want Chris to be hurt, some of the gang's let you pay for Sex but when you walk round the corner they kick the shite out of you, take your money an extort you for more money an the sophistication varys from, regular beatings hidden cam vid's to false DNA tests.

The last one is this, if Chris where on the outside of possibility to find some one he could settle down with would you really want to risk him having Children? In a relationship where this was possible he would either be the abused (most likely) or the abuser (least likely). Imagine the spawn of what such a relationship would turn out like, let that settle in for a moment say Chris at best found his equal an had a Child do you hold out any hope it would turn out as a normal person? Fuck the genetic aspects of it leading to possible deformities what about the mental health of such a hypothetical child?

We are seeing a good example of this playing out with Kai an Grayce.

Chris an Sex is a horrifying thought, non of this is intended as weening or aloging, It's just my personal feelings on the subject.

 

[Lurkingjay]

Are we even sure this actually happened? It reads like a mixture of what his ideal 'sex time' would be, mixed in with somebody else's input to make the explanation more believable.

This post is already taking well-deserved flak, but there are a few reasons that this doesn't make sense as an account he'd make up:

1. We already know plenty about what Chris's ideal "sex time" is like, and it's not this. Even if you assume someone else gave Chris input, there are details here that Chris would never allow in an idealized sex scenario, like the prostitute not letting him fingerbang her (would Chris ever imagine a sex partner denying him anything?) and his not really reaching climax. (Yes, he claims that she climaxed and praised him, but she's a professional. She knows how to flatter a client.) Chris is always bizarre, unrealistic, and extravagant in his lies; if he were lying about an event of this level of psychological magnitude to him, do you really believe he'd let it sound this mediocre?

2. Chris's cybersex and fantasies tend to involve some really porny sex act or weird scenario that he's currently fixated on, and this is a lot more pedestrian -- and, not coincidentally, the sort of thing a prostitute would guide an incompetent, awkward virgin towards going for. In Chris's fantasies, he's an expert lover with full control, but here he gets cowgirl because he clearly doesn't know what he's doing.

3. If someone helped him write this up, wouldn't they have said so here? Is there anyone in Chris's life who would coauthor a fake first-time story and not immediately report on it over here? You can't tell me Anna or Barb read this and gave Chris advice about how to write a believably sordid, unsatisfying paid sex encounter.

 

[Yog-Spergoth]

Eh, my opinion about Chris having hooker-time can be summed up pretty easily.

An it harm none, do what you will.

 

[EI 903]

The fact of the matter is this, the money he has spent on Sex (not toy's) is a drop in the ociean to what the American Tax payer is going to have to pay to fund Chris for the rest of his life.

Did he fuck a hooker? Yep.
Was it legal for him to pay for Sex? No.
Is it the best he can ever hope for? Yep.
Do I really care if he payed for Sex? Nope not really(if what we know is accurate).

Do I want him to pay for it again.... NO, NEVER.
Do I want him to never have sex again... yes.

The last two are the ones that give me pause.
In countries where prostitution is illegal your more likely to end up supporting Sex trafficking (a genuinely reprehensible crime, I donate a fair portion of my income to a charity fighing it an supporting victims of it) so if this became a regular thing for him like once every 6 months (the most I think he would be willing to pay for and what his libido would allow). My reasoning is, I don't want Chris hurting anyone but I don't want Chris to be hurt, some of the gang's let you pay for Sex but when you walk round the corner they kick the shite out of you, take your money an extort you for more money an the sophistication varys from, regular beatings hidden cam vid's to false DNA tests.

The last one is this, if Chris where on the outside of possibility to find some one he could settle down with would you really want to risk him having Children? In a relationship where this was possible he would either be the abused (most likely) or the abuser (least likely). Imagine the spawn of what such a relationship would turn out like, let that settle in for a moment say Chris at best found his equal an had a Child do you hold out any hope it would turn out as a normal person? Fuck the genetic aspects of it leading to possible deformities what about the mental health of such a hypothetical child?

We are seeing a good example of this playing out with Kai an Grayce.

Chris an Sex is a horrifying thought, non of this is intended as weening or aloging, It's just my personal feelings on the subject.

It won't be a regular thing for him because events since his experience with the prostitute have shown that he values toys over sex. No reason to be concerned.

 

[drtoboggan]

We can always count on Chris to share too much with someone. Surprised she didn't need to funnel liquor first.

 

[DangerJones]

Just knowing that Chris' scent ranges from "rotten watermelon" to "homeless person" makes me feel so sad knowing some poor woman gave him a blow job.

 

[Someone in a Tree]

This post is already taking well-deserved flak, but there are a few reasons that this doesn't make sense as an account he'd make up:

1. We already know plenty about what Chris's ideal "sex time" is like, and it's not this. Even if you assume someone else gave Chris input, there are details here that Chris would never allow in an idealized sex scenario, like the prostitute not letting him fingerbang her (would Chris ever imagine a sex partner denying him anything?) and his not really reaching climax. (Yes, he claims that she climaxed and praised him, but she's a professional. She knows how to flatter a client.) Chris is always bizarre, unrealistic, and extravagant in his lies; if he were lying about an event of this level of psychological magnitude to him, do you really believe he'd let it sound this mediocre?

2. Chris's cybersex and fantasies tend to involve some really porny sex act or weird scenario that he's currently fixated on, and this is a lot more pedestrian -- and, not coincidentally, the sort of thing a prostitute would guide an incompetent, awkward virgin towards going for. In Chris's fantasies, he's an expert lover with full control, but here he gets cowgirl because he clearly doesn't know what he's doing.

3. If someone helped him write this up, wouldn't they have said so here? Is there anyone in Chris's life who would coauthor a fake first-time story and not immediately report on it over here? You can't tell me Anna or Barb read this and gave Chris advice about how to write a believably sordid, unsatisfying paid sex encounter.

. Also, if he was describing his ideal sex fantasy, Mia Hamm would be wearing a Rosechu medallion and they would have scissored.

 

[Zim]

Just knowing that Chris' scent ranges from "rotten watermelon" to "homeless person" makes me feel so sad knowing some poor woman gave him a blow job.

Worst part is I bet he's not the worst John she's had.

 

[Lipitor]

We can always count on Chris to share too much with someone. Surprised she didn't need to funnel liquor first.

I mean we know from his account that she wasn't sober for the experience. She smoked weed right before. I know that isn't a big deal, but who knows what else she was on throughout the day. I'm sure most normal women would have to funnel liquor first before just an average john.

 

[AnOminous]

Worst part is I bet he's not the worst John she's had.

Pathetic but at least harmless is a run of the mill John. Crazy and might beat or kill you is the worse category.

 

[Hyperion]

She smoked weed right before. I know that isn't a big deal, but who knows what else she was on throughout the day.

Given her occupation I'm not going to be too hard on her for being stoned on the job.

 

[Katolate]

What always has made me doubt about the validity of the hooker's story is how Chris finally losing his virginity should have been the most mportant event of his entire life,.
Based on previous experiences with things causing deep impacts on Chris's life, one would expect him to have talked and bragged nonstop about finally having sex, and yet he quickly forgot about the entire issue, and never again talked about it.

It just makes no sense.

 

[Le Bateleur]

What always has made me doubt about the validity of the hooker's story is how Chris finally losing his virginity should have been the most mportant event of his entire life,.
Based on previous experiences with things causing deep impacts on Chris's life, one would expect him to have talked and bragged nonstop about finally having sex, and yet he quickly forgot about the entire issue, and never again talked about it.

It just makes no sense.

He did an illegal thing, at a time in his life when he was really afraid of going to jail for another illegal thing. He's stupid, but not so stupid that he couldn't make the link.

 

[Lurkingjay]

What always has made me doubt about the validity of the hooker's story is how Chris finally losing his virginity should have been the most mportant event of his entire life,.
Based on previous experiences with things causing deep impacts on Chris's life, one would expect him to have talked and bragged nonstop about finally having sex, and yet he quickly forgot about the entire issue, and never again talked about it.

It just makes no sense.

This was also during the Snyder court case, where he was pretty sure he was going to jail (I seem to recall that he went to a hooker to make sure he wouldn't die a virgin), so he presumably had other stuff on his mind; I also want to say it was during a period of near-complete public radio silence from him in general. I'm sure he would have bragged a lot more if this had gone down during the golden age of a billion Sonichu fans.

 

[timtommy]

What always has made me doubt about the validity of the hooker's story is how Chris finally losing his virginity should have been the most mportant event of his entire life,.
Based on previous experiences with things causing deep impacts on Chris's life, one would expect him to have talked and bragged nonstop about finally having sex, and yet he quickly forgot about the entire issue, and never again talked about it.

It just makes no sense.

Meh. There are lots of explanations for that. Maybe he realizes that publicly saying you screwed a hooker doesn't impress people that much. Maybe there are certain people (his mother, the church?) who he doesn't want to know about it. Maybe the hooker really drilled the need for discretion into him. Maybe he was a little disappointed by the experience. Maybe he doesn't want to say anything that would preclude pity sex.

But he has never contradicted himself about the hooker. He has occassionally mentioned it since then, usually in leaked private conversations. It has also been confirmed by field agents.

I suggest you believe it.