Chris-Chan: A Comprehensive History

Mate! He is as beautiful and kawaii as Sailor Mercury, but with much bigger tits!
I mean there's being delusional and then there's Chris
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The calls are heavily edited, so are the videos. What you see is after I cut out all the bs
I feel like you could summarize some of the calls even more. Especially as Chris becomes more and more rambly and unhinged. It's up to you though.
 
I'm surprised that the Un-Clit 2.0 didn't kill him, considering his failing health.
I have a few theories as to why Chris didn't die from his taint wound:

  1. The hoard contains or, works as some sort of Lazarus pit.
  2. Some other-worldly entity saved him. As there is no way God would bother to save Chris.
  3. The original CWC did die, and this Chris is really comic Chris taking his place from after the Great Merge.
 
I mean there's being delusional and then there's Chris
"Personality like Belle"? Belle is empathetic and a bibliophile; Chris only thinks of himself and can't structure a coherent sentence.
I have a few theories as to why Chris didn't die from his taint wound:

  1. The hoard contains or, works as some sort of Lazarus pit.
  2. Some other-worldly entity saved him. As there is no way God would bother to save Chris.
  3. The original CWC did die, and this Chris is really comic Chris taking his place from after the Great Merge.
How Barb didn't know about this is beyond me. Then again, I doubt she cares to question Chris about what he does at this point. If I was her (lmao) I would take Chris to the doctor and immediately volunteer him into a psych ward.
 
How Barb didn't know about this is beyond me. Then again, I doubt she cares to question Chris about what he does at this point.

The bitch has been watching I Love Lucy episodes in her head for a good decade. She has no idea what's going on.
 
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Agreed. A lot of the newer episodes are nigh on unwatchable because they are just compilations of Chris in unedited monologues being an insufferable loony troon.
1. That's literally the point. He thought Chris deserved a video documentary because so much of the content associated with him was audiovisual, and you don't get that reading the CWCki.
2. He said in his Q&A that he thinks it's funny when people complain about the Chris segments being unedited... because he does edit them and that must mean he's doing a good job
 
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I wish Geno would just leave all the Chris interviews as short summaries. Many of his episodes are just 10-15 minutes of Chris and some boring troll going on and on and on.
My cringe gland just can't handle Chris trying to human.
Problem is, it wouldn't be "comprehensive" if he shortened them. Which is funny as he used to cliffnote several other calls back from the previous eras and highlighted the, well, highlights.

1. That's literally the point. He thought Chris deserved a video documentary because so of the content associated with him was audiovisual, and you don't get that reading the CWCki.
2. He said in his Q&A that he thinks it's funny when people complain about the Chris segments being unedited... because he does edit them and that must mean he's doing a good job
That may be the case, but they're still too long for most people.
 
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That may be the case, but they're still too long for most people.
So read the CWCki or watch the Down the Rabbit Hole or something.

It's not even his main channel/job. Not every piece of media exists to capture adhd zoomers' tiny windows of attention and explode on the trending tab. There are motivations other than viewcount and watch time. The purpose is to put Chris' audiovisual content into a chronological narrative in a way the CWCki doesn't.
 
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Hey! I just saw Chrischan: A Comprehensive History for almost two weeks. And yeah, I am all caught up. I found classic Chris to be the most fun part, but modern Chris? The classic style seemed to be slowly lacking over the few years due to the times being implemented on him.
 
Whats happening these days is way less fun but still bizarrely fascinating. Its kind of like moving from the suprise breakout blockbuster and into the dingy art house theater scene. I'm still here for the ride but I am questioning the choices of the director.
 
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2013 to modern Chris is so fucking boring a it should should not get the same detail level as say, 2009 imo.

Basically from here on out we have this to look forward to: Chris begging, fake GF's with no interesting payoff, begging for money, weens and money enablers inserting themselves into drama and the idea guys. Maybe if we are lucky we can watch an abridged version of him laughing like an actual retarded person at some pony sonic Youtube video.
 
Chris already did that himself with those red vs blue reaction videos.

Step One - Pretend to be Sonichu by zapping it to the extreme*
Step Two - Deny Barb is dead
Step Three- Hold cat. Cat wants none of it. Cat scampers.
Step Four - Fart or belch repeatedly
Step Five - Yell again that Barb is not dead, then sigh
Step Six- Watch the video, space out like a 5 year old, giggle
Step Seven- Murmur to pretend you know what they're going to say when really you have subs on
Step Eight- Don't acknowledge any Super Chats
Step Nine - Feel like you've done a 12 hour shift in a factory and get some sleep

*Zapping to the Extreme may consist of looking like a whale in drag, murmuring, sitting very still, and being gassy.
 
“I’m not a psychic or a mind reader”

Famous last words, until his brain started turning into mush.

It's also weird seeing the devolution of Chris from this video to today with all rings, bracelets hair accessories and rocks he has all over his flabby body.
 
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