LGBT Chris' Taint

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slep said:
I'm just gonna be curious as to how Chris finds a way to blame the trolls for this. As if we put a gun to his head and frog-marched him straight to the local body mod parlor and strapped him down against his will.
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He'll blame GodBear.
 
Good God. I swear I'm not A-Logging, but at this point, a quick abscess would probably be the best thing for him. It would get him to the ER right away, and the doctors could clean it out and prevent anything worse.
 
I wonder if he got the info about the piercing joint he went to at the Pride thing. He mentioned taking some pamphlets.
 
Everyone needs to calm down. Chris is gonna be just fine. There's virtually no chance this new piercing will get infected. As we all know, Chris's underpants are so toxic not even germs can survive in them. Nothing to worry about. Nothing at all....

Hahahaha. Ok no seriously, he's gonna die. He's gonna get sepsis or MRSA or ballsack syphilis or something horrible like that. I just feel really sorry for the guy who did the actual piercing. I'm almost tempted to go look through the Cville obituaries for unexplained suicides by body modification artists...

I'm gonna miss that chubby little tansbian. *sniff* Godspeed, my sweet *sob* Kaka!

(PS how come this kinda interesting stuff only happens when I'm doing stuff like closing on a house, or visiting a place with palm trees?)
 
Marvin said:
Nah, I guess one of Chris' ~70 friends decided this was a particularly notable post to leak.
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Perhaps off topic, but Chris really has 70 different people that he trusts with this kind of personal info? I know Chris is naive, but Jesus, man.
 
fucking-called-it_zpsdceca608.png


Fucking called it-- Edit: Censored the oh-no-oh-so-naughty-bits from Wikipedia

Fucking. Called. It.
 
I don't even know what to say anymore.

I want to set the internet on fire and pretend everything is ok.
 
While it isn't the trolls who put him up to it, did Chris' girlfriend (if she exists and is not a troll) endorse this in any way? If so, she is either a psycho with some sort of fetish that Chris satisfies, or...I don't know what! :cryblood::cryblood::cryblood:

Whelp, that's it. After all, we know how Chris makes poor decisions that he himself makes (notably Twin Falling Towers)
 
Some of the people on his friends list are people he knows or knew IRL, I believe. I wonder how many will remove him from their friend list now? Holy crap.
 
To answer everyone's question, yes you can die. This is probably going to be too weird for people, but after looking it up online I decided to call my friend who does tatoos and piercings. She was a little pissed cuz it was like 1am for her... but once I said "remember the weird guy? he did something..and I need an adult" she was all ears.

Ok so here's what I learned:
1) my friend has done this piercing only once before; she said it was awful and she refuses to do them anymore and makes a co-worker do them
2) she has never ever seen/heard of a man getting this done. She's done one, seen a couple, heard of several... all women.
3) she says they're really popular for women (especially lesbians) but some men get them
4) yes, you can die from the infection they cause, and infection is pretty common because it's impossible to keep that area clean. She said even a fart can cause an infection. OH and she says they tell the people that get them to not wear underwear for the first couple days and to wear this taped down sterile patch there instead. You should change it every 8 hours. Yeah.

There's a longer story, much much longer story. I'm horrified that Chris did this now. I have learned things I NEVER wanted to learn. It's at this point that I can say that I am truly worried for Chris's health. It's not exaggeration that you can die from this. If it gets infected (and we know it's SUPER likely) and you don't get medical help, you'll get so sick you'll likely die. I asked her if he took it out now would he be safe. She said it depends on when he got it. If it's been a couple weeks and it's not infected already, he should be fine. If it's only been a days (or infected already) taking it out could be a bad idea. Taking it out too early can cause a tear between the two holes (it's a surface piercing) which will create a large hole that will just fester... and then you get sick and probably die if you don't get medical help.

TL; DR I'm horrified, I'm scared, and I'm super disgusted. I also have a shit ton of other information from her that's just... I don't even KNOW anymore. If there's any other questions besides "Can he die?" I have the answers. I'm going to go puke my guts out now and bleach my... everything
 
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