I think a lot of men probably first really encounter the concept of a transwoman in porn. Like, because it's a very popular category. It comes up, you know. And a lot of times, that's not the greatest introduction, because it does present transwomen in a very, like, fetishized way. And that can even, like, go into, like, the language that's used. I'm gonna way bad words now, so, Twitter, just ignore this part. It's like, categories like, "trannie porn", "shemale porn", right. Which I think, cause, if this is how you go around the world thinking about transwomen, as "shemales", "trannies", it's a little bit of a dehumanizing perspective. And a lot of transwomen will be irritated, well, more than irritated, if they get the sense that you just wanna date them out of some experiement of, "oh, I'm curious to be with a chick with a dick", right. That's not... what is a transwoman gonna get out of that? She's just, what, giving you an experience? No, because transwomen want what everyone else wants. We wanna be valued for ourselves. We want to be loved. We want to have relationships. We don't want to be someone's, like, exotic sex tourism for a night.
H3H3: The fact that it's so popular in porn sites. What do you think about that? Is that good? Is that bad? Like, what does that mean? That's it's turned into this porn category?
Nyk: It means a lot of men are liars! (laughs) Well, maybe not liars, I should, that's too judgemental. But there's a lot more men who are attracted to transwomen and transwomen's bodies, than are publically open about that fact. I would say that, we talk about the shame of being trans [which is part of the sexual fetish and Madonna/whore complex but Nyk won't mention that], there's also shame attached to being attracted to trans people. And a lot of people find themselves attracted to trans people and then they don't kinda know what to make of that. Because in their heads, like, suppose you're a man, and you're heterosexual, but you find yourself attracted to this woman who has a penis, for a lot of men this causes them to have this kind of crisis, "OMG, is this gay, am I gay, what is anything", like. I guess I encourage, like, people to, like, relax a little bit. The fact of the matter is that sexuality is very complicated. Most of us are a little more fluid than we'd like to think. And also I would say that, you know, if you're worried, "Is it gay", well, no it's not gay, is the short answer, I would say. Because, what it means to be a gay man is to be a man who's attracted to men. Because you were attracted to a woman with a penis, does that mean now suddenly you wanna have sex with men? Like, no, it doesn't mean that. It means you were attracted to a woman, and that woman had a penis.
