- Joined
- Jul 23, 2018
Alright guys and gals, I'm going to tell you about motherfucking beef tri-tip.
Is ribeye better? Yes. Is chuck cheaper? Yes. Can either of them come close to tri tip's quality-per-dollar ratio? Fuck no!
It is a tricky cut though, and it will be a horrendous pile of shit if you don't prepare it correctly so you'd better fucking listen up.
Buy it at least 24 hours before serving. It should weigh in the neighborhood of 3 pounds and look like this.
Trim all the fat and silverskin that the butcher left on, and then hit it with 1-2 tablespoons kosher salt. It is important to do this at least 7 hours in advance, osmosis is going to draw moisture out the meat, and almost all of it will be reabsorbed, however, the globular proteins that came along for the ride will be brought near the surface of the meat and stay there, which will allow us to get a bitchin sear when we apply high heat later on. Put it in a perforated ziplock bag and then the bag in a large bowl in the bottom of the fridge; the meat will get good air circulation and you'll avoid cross contamination.
Next, seasoning. If you want to go traditional here, garlic powder and black pepper do just fine. I have my own rub I'll share with you though. In order of most to least, white sugar, coffee grounds, cocoa powder, black pepper, garlic powder, chipotle powder. It seems a little weird but you're going to have to trust me on this, the combination of beef, smoke, and all the seasonings really come together in a way you might not expect. Mix it all together and apply whenever the fuck you feel like it. Keep in mind though, we are gong to be cooking this whole thing whole, there is much less surface area/lb of meat than with a steak so make sure and be very generous!
Next, heat. I always use charcoal, so build a two-zone setup with all your coals shoved off to one side, and let it heat up. Meanwhile, make a little tray out of aluminum foil big enough for a handful of woodchips, and fill it up (the kind you use doesn't matter unless it's a 6+ hour cook so use whatever foodsafe variety you want). Once it's fully started, put your tray of wood chips on top of the hot coals, and put the grate on, and the meat on the side opposite the coals, and cover. [If you're afaggot person who prefers a gas grill, just fire up half of the burners. (If you're a really tremendous faggot don't or can't own a grill, I guess you could add some liquid smoke to the meat after the salt, bake it at 215, and then use the broiler to sear it)]. You have a meat thermometer, right? After ~45 minutes you should be around 120 F and ready for the next step, but be vigilant. When you're about 10-15 degrees away from your desired final temp (if you cook this above medium I will personally gouge out your eyes and skullfuck you), take off the lid, and give it about 5 minutes on each side directly over the hot coals. You should now have a bitchin sear.
You're at the home stretch but there is still one last way you can royally fuck this up. You have to slice tri tip against the grain! here's how.
First, cut thru the center like this:
Next, slice the halves as thin as possible like this:
That's it. Serve it with some garlic bread so you can have sandwiches and it'll look like this:
If you can follow directions, it will almost certainly be better than any steak you've had at a restaurant and don't you fucking dare put any bbq/steak sauce on it. Let me know if you end up making it!
Is ribeye better? Yes. Is chuck cheaper? Yes. Can either of them come close to tri tip's quality-per-dollar ratio? Fuck no!
It is a tricky cut though, and it will be a horrendous pile of shit if you don't prepare it correctly so you'd better fucking listen up.
Buy it at least 24 hours before serving. It should weigh in the neighborhood of 3 pounds and look like this.
Trim all the fat and silverskin that the butcher left on, and then hit it with 1-2 tablespoons kosher salt. It is important to do this at least 7 hours in advance, osmosis is going to draw moisture out the meat, and almost all of it will be reabsorbed, however, the globular proteins that came along for the ride will be brought near the surface of the meat and stay there, which will allow us to get a bitchin sear when we apply high heat later on. Put it in a perforated ziplock bag and then the bag in a large bowl in the bottom of the fridge; the meat will get good air circulation and you'll avoid cross contamination.
Next, seasoning. If you want to go traditional here, garlic powder and black pepper do just fine. I have my own rub I'll share with you though. In order of most to least, white sugar, coffee grounds, cocoa powder, black pepper, garlic powder, chipotle powder. It seems a little weird but you're going to have to trust me on this, the combination of beef, smoke, and all the seasonings really come together in a way you might not expect. Mix it all together and apply whenever the fuck you feel like it. Keep in mind though, we are gong to be cooking this whole thing whole, there is much less surface area/lb of meat than with a steak so make sure and be very generous!
Next, heat. I always use charcoal, so build a two-zone setup with all your coals shoved off to one side, and let it heat up. Meanwhile, make a little tray out of aluminum foil big enough for a handful of woodchips, and fill it up (the kind you use doesn't matter unless it's a 6+ hour cook so use whatever foodsafe variety you want). Once it's fully started, put your tray of wood chips on top of the hot coals, and put the grate on, and the meat on the side opposite the coals, and cover. [If you're a
You're at the home stretch but there is still one last way you can royally fuck this up. You have to slice tri tip against the grain! here's how.
First, cut thru the center like this:
Next, slice the halves as thin as possible like this:
That's it. Serve it with some garlic bread so you can have sandwiches and it'll look like this:
If you can follow directions, it will almost certainly be better than any steak you've had at a restaurant and don't you fucking dare put any bbq/steak sauce on it. Let me know if you end up making it!
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