Cookie Crisp is a problematic cereal

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Napoleon Bonerfart

In a Big Chungus dreams stay with you
True & Honest Fan
kiwifarms.net
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Aug 13, 2018
Consider the following:

From 1978 to 1985, the mascot used to be Jarvis the Cookie Crisp Wizard. As we all know, the rise of Wizards (incels) has resulted in pro-Trump, right-wing terrorist attacks on the lgbtq2siap+ community and people of color, therefore eating Cookie Crisp from between 1978 and 1985 contributes to toxic masculinity, rape culture, homophobia, transphobia, racism, and pro-trump Fascism.

Then the Mascot became Chip the Dog, who would assist the Cookie Crook in stealing Cookie Crisp cereal, only to be caught by Officer Crumb. We were never told who the Cookie Crook was taking cookies from. Maybe he was trying to feed his family at the expense of the bourgeois who didn't need those cookies anyway, a glaring example of how Cookie Crisp cereal endorses the failures of capitalism.

In addition, Officer Crumb and Chip had names. The Cookie Crook did not. This represents an uncaring criminal justice system that treats prisoners like conforming-objects (i.e. All black people look the same) and literally reinforces the colonialist idea that minorities are less than dogs. Furthermore, Cookie Crook looks like a racist portrayal of a black person during the "mammy" era of cartoons (small black head, big lips.) His large nose subliminally reinforces the idea that Jews are thieves.
chip.jpeg Cookie-Cop-Cookie-Crook.jpeg

Then Chip The Dog was rebranded as Chip the Wolf. This change represents the pervasive social influence of toxic masculinity. This is one seriously scary dog. People could get PTSD from this. "Wolf Pack" and survivalist mentalities are the domain of right-wing extremist groups such as the proud boys.
chip2.jpeg

In conclusion, the Cookie Crisp mascots are highly problematic and normalize rape culture, police culture, toxic masculinity, fascism, right-wing extremism, capitalism, and colonialism. General Mills could have easily rectified this by choosing a proud transgender woman of color, like Oprah Winfrey or Serena Williams as a cereal mascot, but chose instead to ignore serious human rights issues for the cold embrace of capitalism.

#resist
 
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The Cookie Crisp cereal it used to have a image of a robber guy so the cereal it was actually giving people subconscious imagery of crime leading to people going to prison and the dog was a symbolic gesture of how people sometimes say sup dog leading to images of prison.
 
You should have released this thread in 2013 before Gaymer Gate. Imagine the timeline if we had attacked the cereal industry instead of some random whore doing indie games.

Cereal Gate should have been the movement. It's your fault Jim existed, Ralph and Matt Jarbo got notariety, Sargon got to grift people. We fought the wrong war.
 
OP could pass this off as a legit article. That makes me sad.
 
Chip the dog appeals to furrys.
Except the majority of cereal mascots are animals.
  • Smaks = Frog
  • Golden Crisps = Bear
  • Frosted Flakes = Tiger
  • Fruit Loops = Bird
  • Coco Puffs = Bird 2
  • Honey Nut Cheerios = Bee
You could write these off as "kid's cereal" but even adult-ass Corn Flakes (let's be real, only adults actually put that shit in their mouths because kids wouldn't like how stale as fuck it is) has a Rooster.

This isn't even counting all the "knock-off" brands that come in a bag rather than a box.
 
Except the majority of cereal mascots are animals.
  • Smaks = Frog
  • Golden Crisps = Bear
  • Frosted Flakes = Tiger
  • Fruit Loops = Bird
  • Coco Puffs = Bird 2
  • Honey Nut Cheerios = Bee
You could write these off as "kid's cereal" but even adult-ass Corn Flakes (let's be real, only adults actually put that shit in their mouths because kids wouldn't like how stale as fuck it is) has a Rooster.

This isn't even counting all the "knock-off" brands that come in a bag rather than a box.
Grooming of our kids, to be degenerate furrys in the future *sigh*
 
Except the majority of cereal mascots are animals.
  • Smaks = Frog
  • Golden Crisps = Bear
  • Frosted Flakes = Tiger
  • Fruit Loops = Bird
  • Coco Puffs = Bird 2
  • Honey Nut Cheerios = Bee
You could write these off as "kid's cereal" but even adult-ass Corn Flakes (let's be real, only adults actually put that shit in their mouths because kids wouldn't like how stale as fuck it is) has a Rooster.

This isn't even counting all the "knock-off" brands that come in a bag rather than a box.

The Malt-O-Meal brand is a microaggression. Poor people will buy this knockoff brand and this reinforces the stereotype that black people are all thugs who drink malt liquor.
 
Here’s the mascot for the Kroger off brand cereal
93A49884-A1C9-444D-8DE7-8D99FDF1DF0A.jpeg
That’s Daisy-Wayne Gacee, she’s primarily on meth flakes boxes
 
Did you know that from 1965 to 1998 Kelloggs Apple Jacks was only orange? It wasnt until 1998 they decided to add green to the mix. The original apple mascot was named "Apple Guy" and for some reason in 2004 they changed it to "Bad Apple" and made him accident prone when they also introduced the brand new carefree jamaican mascot CinnaMon. The ration of Orange-Green cereal has been increasing since its introduction and now its almost half of the cereal. By my prediction, by 2035 Apple Jacks will be only green, and the will have killed off the apple mascot, only leaving CinnaMon.
 
I heard that Cookie Crisp is the official cereal of Encyclopedia Dramatica's Faggot of the Year, Laramie Busby.
 
Did you know that from 1965 to 1998 Kelloggs Apple Jacks was only orange? It wasnt until 1998 they decided to add green to the mix. The original apple mascot was named "Apple Guy" and for some reason in 2004 they changed it to "Bad Apple" and made him accident prone when they also introduced the brand new carefree jamaican mascot CinnaMon. The ration of Orange-Green cereal has been increasing since its introduction and now its almost half of the cereal. By my prediction, by 2035 Apple Jacks will be only green, and the will have killed off the apple mascot, only leaving CinnaMon.
CinnaMon was a victim of the cultural appropriation brigade. They removed his dreads and hat and now he’s just a bald headed cinnamon stick.

Feels bad mon man.
 
Except the majority of cereal mascots are animals.
  • Smaks = Frog
  • Golden Crisps = Bear
  • Frosted Flakes = Tiger
  • Fruit Loops = Bird
  • Coco Puffs = Bird 2
  • Honey Nut Cheerios = Bee
You could write these off as "kid's cereal" but even adult-ass Corn Flakes (let's be real, only adults actually put that shit in their mouths because kids wouldn't like how stale as fuck it is) has a Rooster.

This isn't even counting all the "knock-off" brands that come in a bag rather than a box.
NOTICE that none of these cereal mascots are female women persons experiencing femininity.

Where are the cereal sisters?

Consider some of the non-animal mascots:

  • a masculinized sun for Raisin Bran
  • male-coded elves for Rice Krispies
  • the sanitized rape fantasy that is Count Chocula
  • Quisp, an utter alien that still aligns to capitalism's enforcement of the gender binary

It's 2021; long past time for representation at the breakfast table.
 
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