Crazy BF/GF Stories - Everyone's a Little Psycho

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There was this one girl who after our first "date" she said she had pancreatic cancer but that no one else at school knew and she wanted to keep it that way. I agreed to keep her secret and we dated for 6 months and then the whole thing imploded...

During the six months she had also told a handful of other people including a teacher whom had lost her daughter to cancer the year prior. After school she is sitting with the teacher and they are talking about how rough it is for her when the school counselor walks by and overhears. The counselor calls my gf's mother asking why she wasn't informed and Kaboom, her whole world of lies implodes...

She is restricted from going on our class trip, most of her friends won't talk to her, she decides she can't stay at her mothers anymore and moves in with her (supposedly) abusive father. I decided to stick with her. I felt that if I had left too she may have killed herself. She needed some sort of support and I decided I could forgive the lies. That was an extraordinarily difficult decision to come to. When I told her she seemed really happy, but seemed to have another thing on her mind so I asked her what was wrong. She told me "I just need something from you". I was pretty pissed since I already gave her a giant second chance, but I kept my cool and asked her what she needs from me. She said "I-I need bout tree fiddy". And it was around this time I realized that this girl was about 8 stories tall and a crustacean from the paleozoic era. That damned Loch Ness Monster had gotten me again, "Damnit Monstah, I ain't givin' you no tree fiddy!" I yelled as she swam away into the distance.
 
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Not really either a gf OR crazy story, but the girl I wanted to stick my tiny middle school dick in growing up was both really into wolves AND drawing, so I probably dodged a future furry.

I also had a one night stand with a chick and she kept talking about pregnancy the next morning and I've never been nearly as stressed in my life.
 
My ex pretty much made me pay for a trip to go to a concert. He went with my brother and I to the mall making a scene declaring that he hates malls then snatched my purse from me and took a taxi back to the hotel leaving us to figure out our way back to the hotel since he wanted to look at Tess Holliday on my laptop before the concert. Bit before the concert I got changed and he punched the wall bitching that my clothes weren't metal enough, at the concert he got really hammered and almost got into a fight with some guy that was talking to me since I was sitting down holding everything he bought, got black out drunk. Brother and I had to figure out how to drag him (dude's like 400 pounds) back to the hotel since we needed to get on the bus back home in the morning.
 
I had a shitty day. It was one of these days which nothing went as expected. I went home and started playing some Mario Kart Wii, a few moments later my phone was ringing, it was her. I answered up and she started complaining about her situation with her mother, regular teen drama. I was just agreeing with her while playing because at that time I had enough in my head. She asked me if I was listening to her and I agreed again. She asked me if I was playing Mario Kart, I said no right on time I ran over a box, I think she heard the random item sound, because she started saying things like: you don't ever call me again, asshole. Again, teen drama. Things went fine a week later, when she apologized for being rude on the phone.

tl;dr Almost broke up because of Mario Kart.
 
If I kissed him even briefly in public he'd pop a boner so hard he'd have to sit down. Once in a bar he just sat down on the floor against the pool table immediately afterward, no subtlety. His family were mostly sweet but crazy drunks and almost every time we went out one of them would lose something and flip the fuck out thinking it had been stolen and everyone would panic and shout at each other but was really just misplaced. I'd usually be the one to find the 'stolen' item while everyone yelled. He got emotional at a party and cried while we were talking (I don't even remember what about) he and his stepdad would both openly oggle me in equal amounts and even remark to each other if I did something as simple as wear a knee-length skirt with stockings. Even his mom was weirdly objectifying. He and his stepdad both had a keen fascination with Nazis, to a point that he gave me a swastika badge as if it was a normal kind of sweetheart token. He'd refuse weed when offered, stating he was allergic and that it would literally make his eyes bleed. OH and after I scratched his back on our first night in the morning he proudly whipped off his shirt and SHOWED IT OFF TO HIS FRIENDS AND FAMILY IN FRONT OF ME. When I was leaving he couldn't help carry my bags for long so I hauled everything while he walked with nothing, asked me to pay for our cab and his to get back, and promised he'd pay me back for the dinner I paid for his whole family when their card was declined.

This all happened in the span of a week - I was visiting him in person for the first time (we didn't know each other for more than a few weeks before that) in a nearby city and couldn't leave sooner. Broke it off after via messaging after he was already talking about moving in, still a shitty thing to do on my part. I heard it took him a while to get over and I still feel bad about how I handled it, but he had a baby with his next girlfriend or so. I'm grateful every day it wasn't me, although I'm sure he's a sweet father and happy husband. I eventually burned the swastika badge.

edit: grammar
 
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Most Epic Newfag said:
Regale us with your best tales of your insane significant other. I don't have any because I'm a beta virgin loser but I like reading about them so post your best.
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I was terrified of remaining virgin until I got married ( American global brainwash).
but now that I am 29 had 4.1 relationships I wish I had gotten married at 22 when I passed out of college, so much pain & misery that it's not worth it in the end
 
Knew this girl that had no mercy towards anyone. Trust me, I know. Heck, I dated her for two years, and I have met some pretty hardcore mother fuckers during my life. But this lady... She is in a completely different league. I have no words to describe the amount of insanity and hatred this woman has. I broke up with her once. It's been over 20 years, but I still remember every detail what happened that day or should I say night. I was in college back then, having been in school for a couple of weeks. That night I drove to her family’s place on their rural property in the middle of nowhere so I could let her down easy in person. Unfortunately for me it was also her skinhead training compound. My friends were nervous about this, saying that I should break it off over the phone and move away. I thought they were just trying to scare me, but I was wrong, I was so, so wrong. So I get into my car and drive to the property. And there she was. She stood out to me almost immediately as she was dressed in an all-brown Nazi uniform. She chanted 'Racial Holy War', and then she raised her AA-12 and began shooting with god-like accuracy. When the shootout was over, I was the only one still alive. Before I could explain that I still wanted to be friends she shot me in the leg. I don't remember much of what happened after that as I was passing out because of the blood loss. The last thing I can recall though is her standing over, urinating in my face saying "Drink this you fucking kike cock sucking loser!" I still see a psychiatrist on a daily basis.
 
Testaclese Maximus said:
Knew this girl that had no mercy towards anyone. Trust me, I know. Heck, I dated her for two years, and I have met some pretty hardcore mother fuckers during my life. But this lady... She is in a completely different league. I have no words to describe the amount of insanity and hatred this woman has. I broke up with her once. It's been over 20 years, but I still remember every detail what happened that day or should I say night. I was in college back then, having been in school for a couple of weeks. That night I drove to her family’s place on their rural property in the middle of nowhere so I could let her down easy in person. Unfortunately for me it was also her skinhead training compound. My friends were nervous about this, saying that I should break it off over the phone and move away. I thought they were just trying to scare me, but I was wrong, I was so, so wrong. So I get into my car and drive to the property. And there she was. She stood out to me almost immediately as she was dressed in an all-brown Nazi uniform. She chanted 'Racial Holy War', and then she raised her AA-12 and began shooting with god-like accuracy. When the shootout was over, I was the only one still alive. Before I could explain that I still wanted to be friends she shot me in the leg. I don't remember much of what happened after that as I was passing out because of the blood loss. The last thing I can recall though is her standing over, urinating in my face saying "Drink this you fucking kike cock sucking loser!" I still see a psychiatrist on a daily basis.
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copypasta or legit?
If legit...holy shit. where is she now?
 
Testaclese Maximus said:
Still running the compound. The authorities are too scared to move in.
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no wait, we have a murderer on the loose and authorities are too scared to move in?
what is this, gotham city or some other comic book city, where police is full of useless retards?

Lioness said:
This all happened in the span of a week - I was visiting him in person for the first time (we didn't know each other for more than a few weeks before that) in a nearby city and couldn't leave sooner.
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let me guess...met online? those things never worked for me. I always got either uggos or bitches that suffered from extreme mood swinging.
 
My friend is what I would describe as a satyriasis. He would fuck anything that moved. This chick he was banging and she learned he was banging others came to our house and light his clothes on fire at the main door. Normally I'd be like 'meh', but she also had a .38 and promised to kill him.

So I had to crouch down from the windows while smokeing my brick and drinking my booze....bad form.
 
My ex-wife, who had a few diagnosed mental disorders, has actually joined a poly-sex-cult (they call themselves a sex and nudity positive family) and moved to Honduras with them, according to a friend who keeps tabs on that kind of shit. She is a licensed veterinarian with huge tits, so my guess is she's their supplier and practice motorboat.
 
This is just one story about this girl:

Chick I dated for about a year was big into emotional manipulation. She loved to fight, and then fuck afterward. As much as she was a pain to date, the sex was awesome and she was a very kinky/dirty girl.

One night we were having a fight (about what I can't remember), and she left the room in a huff. Next thing I know she comes back and her arms were bloody. I ask her what happened, and she said she cut her wrists because of our fight.

Of course I was horrified, so I said we should probably break up if I make her feel like cutting herself (she'd never talked about cutting before, or since so I was really surprised). Apparently she was expecting a different reaction, because she argued with me about it for a bit, and eventually admitted to me that SHE ONLY DID IT TO MAKE ME FEEL BAD. So she was totally full of shit and was just trying to manipulate me.

Again, this is just one story about this chick. I have so much more.
 
Worst I've had besides my exwife is my current wife woke up one night crying because she had a super realistic dream while she had the flu that I cheated on her with her best friend. Took me a few minutes of talking to her that night to calm her down. The next morning she apologized for being crazy.

Though in college I was sex-buddies with a girl who was kinda nutty, but since all we did was smash uglies once a week or so it wasn't too bad, just a LOT of dirty talk in sex and she would demand for me to choke her and cum on her face. Which in the early 90s was pretty out there. When I found out she had a fiance back home I stopped, even though she had him call me and say it was cool.
 
Dirt McGirt said:
lol that must've been an awkward call to get
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I grabbed my roommate and made him listen in on it because I wasn't sure wtf was happening. He turned purple trying to silently laugh as the guy told me it was okay to bareback his fiance. I ended up just telling the guy "Im attractive enough to get my own tail, man. I don't need to borrow yours"
 
First of all, I should dox any girl who's dated me as they are a certified lolcow.

I've spent most of my adult life living with SOs, it's not a big deal to me. I've never had a roommate oddly, but one ex was super team bassomatic, she wanted a family and the idea I was warming up to. She was scared as fuck of commitment, so long story short.... she ended an argument about how she was scared to use the word "love" towards me with "just hold down and get me prego you know I'd keep it and want to wife up"

I'm lucky that cream pie didn't work.
 
i've only ever dated one girl and dear god, she was terrible. she's made me terrified of love.
we were going steady for about four months, but towards the end of five she began to act less romantic towards me. she had a lot of short relationships with other people, so i was kind of worried. i was younger and a little emotionally constipated so i hid my feelings and let myself feel horrible.
all of a sudden, on month six she randomly claimed she was actually polyamory and introduced someone else into our relationship without telling me or warning me, and soon after dumped me because she apparently misinterpreted that we were just friends for almost 7 months (yeah, right). years later, she turned out a toxic bitch, so it's whatever
 
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