Create a New Oscar Category

[Positron]

Best couch cast.

 

[KO 864]

Best Boobs

 

[ShittyRecolor]

Best Foreign Animated Film: Because God DAMN are there a lot of beautiful foreign animated movies that get no love or recognition because "Muh Disney/Pixar"

Hell, if it was up to me there would be multiple award categories of animated movie awards.

 

[ObsoleteMediaFormat]

Firstly winners for more technical awards should only be voted on by those that work/worked in those areas, e.g. editors vote for best editing and pretty much anything outside best movie and acting awards.
Best Stunt Coordination
Best Vocal Performances (sadly if this award did happen high likely it would just be given to random celebrity that does a half assed job)
Best Lighting (maybe this award will stop the flat sitcom lighting too many movies have now)
Best Motion Capture Performance
Best Debut Film

 

[Midlife Sperglord]

Best Gratuitous Nude Scene. Because that would certainly boost Oscar ratings right there.

Best Horror Movie Kill Scene. Ditto.

 

[Absolutego]

TBH I'm surprised they haven't taken a page from the Emmys or Golden Globes and started having Best Picture divvied up by genre.

Best Drama, Best Comedy, Best Genre Flick (horror, sci-fi and fantasy), etc.

Also I want to split "best makeup" between impressive transformations and historical accuracy. Phenomenal fantasy makeup keeps getting cucked come awards season for things like Iron Lady.

 

[The Decimator]

Most Woke Film: Self-explanatory, this award is for the film that has the most woke cast. For example, Black Panther.

 

[UnKillFill]

Best Product Placement.

 

[Spaceman from space]

"Best sound design" - because Krampus should get one
"The shitty idea that was cheap in execution and made a lot of money in the box office so prepare for hundreds of sequels and copycats in the future award" - eg. stupid Internet horrors or Paranormal Activity flicks.

 

[PS1gamenwatch]

UgliestBest Foot

 

[DeadwastePrime]

best picture with black actors and actresses to circlejerk over how diverse hollywood is

 

[Andrei Tarkovsky]

Best Actor in a Leading Role (for having a dick and dressing like a chick).

 

[DrJonesHat]

Best Actor/Actress in a Terrible Movie: You know how some movies are shit, and are only watchable because the lead actor/actress pulls out all the stops in their performance? This award would recognize those noble souls.

 

[omori]

Most Woke

 

[Positron]

Most Blatant Mary Sue.

 

[Jmz_33]

Best Feet

(Winner: Quentin Tarantino)

 

[Idiotron]

Best Stunts

Why isn't this already a thing?
These people work waaaaaaaaaaaaay harder than any actor ever did and don't get any credit for it.
The only time anyone mentions stuntwork is when Tom Cruise releases another movie or when some asshole says: "I do my own stunts" because they managed to jump over a table onto a mattress while hanging from 10 different wires.

I mean, a girl lost her arm doing a stupid motorcycle stunt for the last Resident Evil movie.
Give her SOMETHING for it, let her name be known.
All those people who replace Chris Evans or Scarlet Johannson whenever they have to do something more than look pretty in a Marvel movie, the bad guys in the John Wick movies, whoever is replacing the bald guys in Fast & Furious movies when they're far away or shot from the back, give them recognition.
I'm sure they get paid but probably not enough.

No, fuck them but don't forget to praise Beyonce for stumbling over her lines in the Lion King remake.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

Let's cut to the real purpose of the Oscars:
Best masturbatory film on how smart we are for being involved in film making.

 

[FluffyTehFennekin]

Best quote.

 

[Absolutego]

Best Stunts

Why isn't this already a thing?
These people work waaaaaaaaaaaaay harder than any actor ever did and don't get any credit for it.
The only time anyone mentions stuntwork is when Tom Cruise releases another movie or when some asshole says: "I do my own stunts" because they managed to jump over a table onto a mattress while hanging from 10 different wires.

The official explanation from the Academy IIRC is that they don't want to incentivize stunt performers to take bigger risks for a potential Oscar in the same way actors/directors do more daring roles/movies when chasing one. In the case of stunts, after all, the output of that strategy failing isn't a cringeworthy performance, it's likely a corpse. They do regularly grant lifetime achievement awards to the most prolific stuntmen as some measure of compensation for that, but there's still a lot of petitioning to get them to change their mind.