Sonichu CWCollateral

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Konstantinos said:
Ok, I just started reading CWCollateral and I have to say, it's the best damn Sonichu spin-off I've ever read. Granted, that's not saying a lot considering what it's based off of but it just blew me away. The characterization is rich, the lore is incredibly in-depth and the CWC jokes are as plentiful as they are subtle. Seriously, I'm really impressed thus far.

On a side note, I think the reason the violence against the chu larvas works is because they're clearly identified as being evil. The Sonees and Roseys themselves are depicted as being vicious and brutish when given the opportunity and the creatures they grow up to be are just as malevolent.
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Thank you very much! I'm glad you're enjoying the story so far. Please feel free to let me know what you think of it as you go.
 
Manajerkop said:
Thank you very much! I'm glad you're enjoying the story so far. Please feel free to let me know what you think of it as you go.
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One complaint I do have is that some of the sonee-related sections start to verge on being torture porn. It feels excessive is all. That's my only gripe thus far but its weirdly prevalent. If that could be buffered out than I think the story would be near perfect for sure.
 
Konstantinos said:
One complaint I do have is that some of the sonee-related sections start to verge on being torture porn. It feels excessive is all. That's my only gripe thus far but its weirdly prevalent. If that could be buffered out than I think the story would be near perfect for sure.
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Absinthe said:
Genuine question: how do you feel your work compares with the kind of content discussed in these threads?

http://cwckiforums.com/threads/fluf...ut-tortured-mentally-retarded-pony-foal.4981/
http://cwckiforums.com/threads/blue-moon-nursery-baby-smurf-gore-snuff-torture-pornography.4982/
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Yikes. I never knew that stuff existed until now, and I think I'd be better off not knowing it existed.

That said, here's my answer to both of these questions. The reason Sonees and Roseys disgust me so much is that they're basically everything a child, or a baby animal, should not be. Everything about them - their appearance, their speech, their behavior - is just creepy and wrong, and the fact that Chris created them only serves to amplify the sheer repulsiveness I feel towards them. Then there's the interpretation that the Sonichu children are Chris's projections of what he believes to be aspects of his own life - himself as Robbie/Robee, Cera as Sarah Hammer, and Christine as Crystal. Sure, it's reading too deeply into this whole thing, but at the same time, it's an interesting concept. Ultimately, though, it's the blatant creepiness of them that gets to me, not the annoyance. That's what led me to turn them into the horrific abominations seen in CWCollateral - the potential was always there, it just needed to be unleashed.

The thing is, I believe that if someone's going to write something like that, they need to make the victims pretty damn deserving of their fate. Otherwise, it's just gratuitous, unsatisfying, excessive, and disgusting. For what it's worth, I tried my hardest to make Sonees and Roseys into some of the most vile, loathsome little creatures that I could in order to justify the PVCC's extermination campaign, and from the reactions I've seen out of CWCollateral's fanbase, it worked. If the story was nothing but nonstop torture and murder, it would get tiresome after a while. Hell, even Operation Hedgeclipper can be viewed as important to the plot, both as a political assassination of Sonichu's family and as a blow to morale for the chu population of CWCville. That's why I like focusing on the PVCC vs. Chris plotline first and foremost - it presents a reason for the carnage, especially given all that the Jerkops have suffered at the hands of Chris and his creations.

TL;DR - If you're gonna write about torturing and murdering Smurfs, ponies, Sonees and Roseys...anything, really...make sure you have a damn good reason for it, and that you at least try to justify it. Otherwise, it's not much more than death for death's sake. That's my two cents on the matter - take 'em or leave 'em.
 
STORY UPDATE!

CWCollateral: Sub-Episode 4 (Part C)

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Back at Slumberland, the pieces of the shattered Honey Badgers squad begin to reassemble as Nate and Nick arrive with a literal busload of reinforcements. With no word from Mary Lee Walsh, Clyde Cash, or the missing members of their team, the happy reunion quickly turns to confusion. Elsewhere, Kevin and Graduon continue their look into the long-standing feud between the Cherokian and Sawabi clans, chronicling their rivalry and the eventual battle between them. Told in a series of memories, the spirit's tale delves into the great siege of Sawabia, the lone warrior who challenged the tyrant Cherok, the collapse of both civilizations, and the true origin of the Anchuent Prophecy. As each chapter of the ancient saga unearths new mysteries, Kevin soon realizes that he has become entangled in something far greater and more complicated than he ever could have imagined. Every memory that Graduon has shown him has led to this moment of truth, a shocking secret that could redefine everything he thought he knew about his involvement with the PVCC.

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DeviantART link: http://manajerkop.deviantart.com/art/CWCollateral-Sub-Episode-4-Part-C-491494373

As always, enjoy the update, and let me know if you have comments or criticisms regarding this new part or the story in general. I'm always looking to improve.

- Manajerkop
 
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Something makes me think that in this new incarnation of the prophecy, Chris is the rival, Kevin is the hero, meaning Allie's the lady and is still alive!
 
I'm a tad confused as to what the setting of this story is. The beginning mentions it being in Pokemon but it still seems a bit unclear to me.
 
Konstantinos said:
I'm a tad confused as to what the setting of this story is. The beginning mentions it being in Pokemon but it still seems a bit unclear to me.
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AFAIK, it's based in CWCville and with a lot of the shit that Chris threw in because atsimu.
 
Konstantinos said:
I'm a tad confused as to what the setting of this story is. The beginning mentions it being in Pokemon but it still seems a bit unclear to me.
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The setting is WTFE (where the fuck ever). Basically, think of Earth as we know it, but populated by Pokemon, Sonic characters, and most of the stuff that Chris put into his comic. For some reason, Virginia has a copy of the Kanto region of Pokemon slapped right in the middle of it, Ruckersville/CWCville is located on the coast rather than being landlocked (for CWCville Beach), and Station Square is one of Virginia's largest cities.

Just don't think about it too much. Chris certainly didn't. I did, and...it nearly broke me.
 
Manajerkop said:
Thank you very much! I'm glad you're enjoying the story so far. Please feel free to let me know what you think of it as you go.
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Please keep writing. I seriously love it, and this is coming from a guy with a masters in library science. If you made a book, I would buy it. Seriously.
 
flossman said:
Please keep writing. I seriously love it, and this is coming from a guy with a masters in library science. If you made a book, I would buy it. Seriously.
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A master's degree in library science? That's awesome! I don't know too much about the process, though - what exactly do you need to do to get the degree?

I've ghostwritten one actual book and edited three, so far. CWCollateral is going a little slowly as of late due to an interesting RL development (marine bio internship in Virginia), but I'm still staying with this project to the end, even if it takes another three years (it won't). Thanks for reading, and for your great feedback!
 
Manajerkop said:
A master's degree in library science? That's awesome! I don't know too much about the process, though - what exactly do you need to do to get the degree?

I've ghostwritten one actual book and edited three, so far. CWCollateral is going a little slowly as of late due to an interesting RL development (marine bio internship in Virginia), but I'm still staying with this project to the end, even if it takes another three years (it won't). Thanks for reading, and for your great feedback!
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To get it you have to be legally insane to go through all the papers and assignments. :P Not many schools have an information sciences grad program, so I was lucky that UW-Milwaukee has one of the best. My undergrad is in history (read: abject poverty).

Don't worry about how slowly it's taking to write! I want Kevin to be safe and to get to the root of his anger... and stay with Allie. She's awesome.

(I accidentally wrote Jexis)
 
flossman said:
Don't worry about how slowly it's taking to write! I want Kevin to be safe and to get to the root of his anger... and stay with Allie. She's awesome.
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Kevin? Safe? If anything, the past 16 chapters should have proved that our friend Mr. Shaw and safety do not go well together AT ALL.
 
Manajerkop said:
Kevin? Safe? If anything, the past 16 chapters should have proved that our friend Mr. Shaw and safety do not go well together AT ALL.
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This is very true. Okay, I hope he's... not going to die and/or be possessed by Graduon for much longer.

One thing I forgot to mention is that it's a good thing you haven't been afraid to kill off characters we form a bond with. It's a really hard thing to pull off, but you've pulled it off.
 
flossman said:
This is very true. Okay, I hope he's... not going to die and/or be possessed by Graduon for much longer.

One thing I forgot to mention is that it's a good thing you haven't been afraid to kill off characters we form a bond with. It's a really hard thing to pull off, but you've pulled it off.
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Man RR Jerkop...
 
flossman said:
One thing I forgot to mention is that it's a good thing you haven't been afraid to kill off characters we form a bond with. It's a really hard thing to pull off, but you've pulled it off.
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CWCissey said:
Man RR Jerkop...
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Prediction. Before the end of the story, at least one of the upcoming deaths is going to make a lot of people hate me, and I'm fairly sure it won't be any of the Combo's.

Also, general question for everyone: out of curiosity, which death scene hit the hardest? And if anyone says Rosechu, Robbie, Cera, or Christine, GET OUT. :twisted:
 
Manajerkop said:
Prediction. Before the end of the story, at least one of the upcoming deaths is going to make a lot of people hate me, and I'm fairly sure it won't be any of the Combo's.

Also, general question for everyone: out of curiosity, which death scene hit the hardest? And if anyone says Rosechu, Robbie, Cera, or Christine, GET OUT. :twisted:
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Steve or Allie. Al has already died once, so he's clearly a superbeing god. :P
 
I have to agree with Flossman, Allie is likely going to be the one that will die.

As for the death that hit me in the feels the most, probably Kel's, just because of how insane she went and that she had to be put down like a rabid animal.
 
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