💼 Careercow Dan Harmon - Creator of Community, co-creator of Rick and Morty, and barely functional alcoholic

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So it looks like Heller started appearing on Harmontown and the official reddit had some complaints about that. She took it about as well as you’d expect:
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Even seems to be taking a page out of Harmon’s book with a personalized block hashtag:
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Also think I solved the mystery as to why Heller’s okay with Harmon being a creepy degenerate:
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Dan Harmon thinks he’s like Rick Sanchez when he’s more like an egotistical Homer Simpson.
Homer can keep a woman for more than five minutes tho.

EDIT: Alright just read that IG post by Heller and now I feel a lot less bad about her getting slapped to shit by the cow corpse that is Harmon. Anyone that crazy, pathetic and self absorbed deserves a fat slobby abuser like him.
 
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Yeah after going through her Instagram I can’t say I feel sorry for her either. She comes off like an insecure attention whore who knows that she’d be like every other boring Instagram chick if she didn’t flash her tits every 5 photos and act like she’s funny.

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Also drinking breast milk is mentioned:
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Also am I the only one who finds it a little skeevy that a 30 year old woman is hanging out with a 15 year old girl and commissions her to draw portraits of herself topless/nude?
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And finally:
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Please don’t let them breed.
 
Why the fuck do we constantly have to see this fat drunken degenerate naked?
 
Someone forgot to tell Harmon's soon-to-be-wife that Jenny McCarthy did the "crude chick" routine first and it stopped being funny 20 years ago.
 
Yeah after going through her Instagram I can’t say I feel sorry for her either. She comes off like an insecure attention whore who knows that she’d be like every other boring Instagram chick if she didn’t flash her tits every 5 photos and act like she’s funny.




Also am I the only one who finds it a little skeevy that a 30 year old woman is hanging out with a 15 year old girl and commissions her to draw portraits of herself topless/nude?
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And finally:
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Please don’t let them breed.

He's almost at the point where he's shooting blanks! Don't breed please! We don't want a Lil' Harmon running around!
 
Someone forgot to tell Harmon's soon-to-be-wife that Jenny McCarthy did the "crude chick" routine first and it stopped being funny 20 years ago.
I’d argue that crude humor in general can still be funny, you just gotta be smart about it.

Heller however is not smart and, much like Amy Schumer, doesn’t realize “look at my sagging tits” isn’t a joke.
 
He's almost at the point where he's shooting blanks! Don't breed please! We don't want a Lil' Harmon running around!

He's autistic and an alcoholic, so his sperm is damaged on top of just being old man jizz, so any resulting kids would probably be super-autistic.
 
He's autistic and an alcoholic, so his sperm is damaged on top of just being old man jizz, so any resulting kids would probably be super-autistic.
And lets be real: Heller and Harmon would likely grow bored of their offspring the second they stopped being cute and pawn it off to some underpaid nanny/nurse to do all the messy parts of child rearing.

They can’t even handle low-effort internet bait without going into “I’m not even mad bro BLOCKED” mode or (in Harmon’s case) going off on 36 page long Twitter rants about how people who criticized him are all worthless faggots who should kill themselves because their parents don’t love them... and only give half-hearted “sorry I was drunk and you pissed me off enough to make me say that to you” apologies when people call him out on it.

Can you imagine him trying to deal with children throwing tantrums or a teenager talking back to him?
 
How a lot of you that followed Sargon or whatever felt about watching his decline- that's how I feel about Dan. I love his content but he CONSTANTLY self sabotages it, from Community (though chevy chase does seem like a dick), to the antics with Silverman, to Rick and Morty delays/abrupt tone changes to putting Harmonquest in a dumb place nobody would see it - he's like sargon except in reverse. Except he's hurting himself (and fans) upward, like a man trying to throw himself down an escalator only to end up right at the fucking top again.

He succeeds, feels dopamine, and immediately does everything in his power to turn that shit off at the source. Stop making me love your shit like a puppy then drowning it in front of me while telling me to my face how dumb I am to enjoy it with the meta.... not that i feel invested in this cow.
 
The ship for you being a “positive role model for young men” sailed fucking years ago, Daniel.

Even his hand is fat, like a giant slab of sausage with little stubby fingers sticking out of it, and even his fingers are fat, so fat you can tell where they've fattened up around the ring on his finger.
 
I also can’t get over Harmon’s whole Born Again Male Feminist “Oh I know society expected me manly, but I’ve ALWAYS dreamed of being the handsome prince rescued by a knight in tasteful boob armor ever since I was a boy” when everything else he’s said in the past indicates he’s always been an impotent incel who resents women for not throwing themselves at him, and all this #woke shit is a fairly recent change in the last 5 years - probably even less.

Someone really outta juxtapose this with though MySpace rants where he claims women are opportunistic succumbuses who are incapable of feeling real love. It’s gonna be really funny when the inevitable “Female R&M Staff Come Forward with Sexual MisConduct Accusations: Who Could’ve Forseen This?” story eventually breaks. This whole post just screams “PR ploy.”
 
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