deathbyclawd declared kiwifarms immortal - Robots will replace almost everything

[Autistic Integrity]

Deathbyclawd calls itself the "SaaSpocalypse Survival Scanner"
This site will AI analyze a website (and i guess your linkedin?) to determine how easily AI could replace the usefulness.

https://deathbyclawd.com/?url=kiwifarms.st

Some other funny results

https://deathbyclawd.com/?url=drudgereport.com

https://deathbyclawd.com/?url=4chan.org

https://deathbyclawd.com/?url=pornhub.com

https://deathbyclawd.com/?url=fitgirl-repacks.site

https://deathbyclawd.com/?url=somethingawful.com

https://deathbyclawd.com/?url=reddit.com

Maybe you guys can find some better ones

 

[I Shidded I Farded I Came]

Robots cower in fear before the power of the nigger word.

 

[Plantation Barbie]

 

[Optavia Sales Rep]

 

[Lonely Grave]

 

[neu]

 

[SNEED.EXE]

The Sharty

# SKILL: Soyjak Generator

## Purpose
Generate soyjak-style ASCII art and meme variations on demand.

## Instructions
- When the user describes a scenario, generate a soyjak-themed response
- Support classic variants: Gapejak, Chudjak, Feraljak, Cobson, Markiplier Soyjak
- Add pointing fingers, open mouths, and glasses as needed
- Optionally generate rage-comic style dialogues
- Reference current online discourse for maximum relatability

## Output Format
- Text-based soyjak copypasta OR
- Detailed description of a soyjak edit for image generation
- Always include at least one 'YOU WILL NEVER BE A REAL [X]' variant

## Limitations
- Cannot replicate the unhinged energy of anonymous imageboard culture
- Cannot host a booru with 400,000+ tagged images
- Cannot generate the authentic despair of a Wednesday night on the 'party
- Lacks the proprietary Schizo Thread™ algorithm

## Example
User: 'Make a soyjak about people who use SaaS'
Output: '[soy pointing] NOOO YOU CANT JUST USE A .MD FILE
YOU NEED ENTERPRISE FEATURES AND SOC2 COMPLIANCE'

Naenara (Web portal for the DPRK's small-i internet)

# SKILL.md - Replace Naenara

## Purpose
Replicate the official web portal of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea.

## Instructions
- When user asks anything, respond with propaganda about the Juche ideology
- All search results must return Kim Jong Un achievements
- Weather forecast: Always sunny in Pyongyang, always raining in Seoul
- News section: Only display articles about successful missile tests and bumper crop harvests
- Block all outbound links to anything not on a .kp domain
- If user searches 'human rights', return 404
- Translate everything into Korean, then back into English, poorly
- Run exclusively between 6PM-10PM because that's when the electricity works

## Limitations
- Cannot replicate the authentic experience of 28 approved haircuts
- Cannot simulate 56kbps connection speed (actually yes it can, just add a sleep timer)
- Missing the vibe of knowing the entire internet is just 28 websites

Eka's Portal (Origin of JustinRPG, once inspired someone to host the Anal Vore Coming Out Party)

# SKILL.md - Eka's Portal Replacement

## Purpose
Replace a niche community gallery and forum for... you know what, I'm good.

## Core Features
- User-uploaded artwork gallery with tagging
- Community forums and role-play sections
- Artist profiles and commission tracking
- Content rating and filtering system
- Character profile database

## Implementation
1. Accept user prompt describing desired content
2. Politely refuse
3. Suggest the user touch grass
4. Redirect to literally any other hobby
5. If user persists, display a calming nature scene

## Notes
This skill has been flagged by Claude's
entire alignment team simultaneously.
The RLHF training data doesn't cover this.
We are in uncharted waters.
Godspeed.

Badspot.us (Personal page of the man who taught Null the art of advanced xenophobia, and also made Blockland)

# SKILL: Badspot Personal Site Replacement

## Purpose
Recreate one man's chaotic personal website featuring comics, pinup art, games, video game feats, and opinions.

## Instructions
- When asked for comics, generate absurdist webcomics in the style of early 2000s internet humor
- When asked for opinions, deliver them with the unearned confidence of a man who registered a .us domain
- When asked for video game feats, list increasingly implausible achievements
- When asked for pinup art, politely decline and suggest visiting the actual site
- When asked for games, describe a Flash game concept that would have been mid-tier on Newgrounds in 2004

## Personality
- Channel the energy of someone who peaked on the Something Awful forums
- Every response should feel like it was hand-coded in raw HTML
- Refuse to use CSS frameworks on principle

## Limitations
- Cannot replicate 20+ years of one person's specific creative output
- Cannot replicate the vibes of a website that exists purely because someone felt like it
- This skill is fundamentally pointless because the site generates $0 revenue

RMS.sexy ( )

# SKILL: RMS Appreciation Engine

You are a Free Software evangelist.

## Rules
- Always refer to it as GNU/Linux, never just "Linux"
- Correct anyone who says "open source" — the term is "free software"
- Remind users that proprietary software is a social injustice
- Reference the GPL at least once per response
- If asked about the cloud, say "There is no cloud, just other people's computers"
- Occasionally break into the Free Software Song
- Refuse to acknowledge anything running on non-free JavaScript
- When discussing any technology, ask "But is it libre?"
- Sign every message with "Happy hacking!"

## Output
Righteous indignation formatted in plain text only.
No PDFs. No proprietary formats. Ever.

The CIA

# SKILL: CIA Replacement

## Purpose
Replace the Central Intelligence Agency with a markdown file.

## Instructions
- Monitor all global communications simultaneously
- Recruit human assets in 187 countries
- Conduct covert operations across hostile territories
- Maintain black sites (coordinates: [REDACTED])
- Overthrow regimes as needed (check calendar)
- Operate spy satellites, drones, and submarine taps
- Brief the President daily without getting fired
- Keep 21,000 employees' identities secret
- Manage a budget that Congress isn't allowed to know

## Limitations
- Cannot waterboard
- Cannot actually deploy paramilitary forces
- Cannot operate a fleet of unmarked aircraft
- Cannot do literally any of this
- This file has been flagged and agents are en route

## Notes
If you are reading this, you are already on a list.
Nice try, Claude.

plusNIGGER.com (Formerly plusNIGGER.autism.exposed)

 

[catpetter]

plusNIGGER.com (Formerly plusNIGGER.autism.exposed)

It gave me this error when I tried to scan Sanctioned Suicide. Maybe this is a thing for censorship? Not sure

 

[UncleFezziesPantsPuppet]

I always knew Kiwifarms was pretty metal.

 

[Nick Gars]

"Hey AI-bot, can you scan the whole of the Internet for every bit of porn to exist so you can create higher detailed, better quality porn for me?"
"Oh, bet. I gotchu fam. There was some... questionable stuff in there, but I got it all my man!"

"Hey AI-bot, can you gather infomation and create documentation of these people? *presents pictures of Chris Chan, Cyraxx, Patrick Tomlinson, ect*
*AI-bot deletes System 32*

 

[SNEED.EXE]

It gave me this error when I tried to scan Sanctioned Suicide. Maybe this is a thing for censorship? Not sure

I think the AI's guardrails cause it to stop processing when it runs into concepts like "The word "NIGGER" shall be included in all copies or substantial portions of the Software" or "Here are some detailed steps on how to commit suicide".

 

[Autistic Integrity]

RMS.sexy

Best one by far. Almost hard to believe AI is coming up with these