Gonna drop this and depart. I think I've hit my low bottom again. But this time I do not want to ever bother trying to stand up and fight anymore.
Last few months of my life were atrocius and I'm overburned and exhausted to the point that my inner hatred for everything start breaching the borders of my self-restraints. It doesn't help that, despite all effort I put into betterment of myself as a person trying my best to do the right stuff irl I get punished for this. It doesn't matter what I do or plan to, it ends up the same. I've done something, I put my soul into it, I get nothing but negative back. It was like this before, but this time it's too much to handle it on my own and I can't handle it, everything ultimately falls apart and what happens irl is the cause of this, mainly. That being said I'm about to depart for good for now. That means I'm gonna drop off from Farms and what discord servers I've hanged out in, my socials, everything. I don't get better, my art skills are in stalemate because my irl job took everything from me for a while, leaving me overburned and unwilling to do anything. I did an art piece yesterday however, but this one was made to just piss off some people even if I had no intentions of that sort.
I need to sort myself and what I do out. Whenever I'll become happy living or deceased you'll get to know that. I'll make sure of that.
If someone wanted to dox me it's your time to shine. I know some would sure have grudge with or on me so it's your time to shine.
Here's my xitter.
Here's my burner for when I needed to adress false accusations in pedophilia that were coming from faggotry riddled retragames shithole servers such as Doom community ones and Civvie11's dungeon. After 3 years of doing fuck all since these accusations have happened because I haven't knew what to do and how to deal with this.
I post this willingly and full knowing the consequences of these decisions. If you want to tell I'm MATI or retarded you might be right or wrong, it doesn't really matter at this point. Whatever you'll make up from these is up to you, but I'm tired of battling my anxiety and feelings of guilt and hatred, of self-loathe because I feel them every single day for all my wrongs, unfullfilled life and understanding that the value of my life and of art endeavors that I've been doing for people are equal to absolute zero. That's a life to live, for sure. That's why I'm intend to drop all of it and just try to keep whatever left for me in this life. That being the job that seem to not want to let me go and my family, the one I was born in.
Farewell.
Last few months of my life were atrocius and I'm overburned and exhausted to the point that my inner hatred for everything start breaching the borders of my self-restraints. It doesn't help that, despite all effort I put into betterment of myself as a person trying my best to do the right stuff irl I get punished for this. It doesn't matter what I do or plan to, it ends up the same. I've done something, I put my soul into it, I get nothing but negative back. It was like this before, but this time it's too much to handle it on my own and I can't handle it, everything ultimately falls apart and what happens irl is the cause of this, mainly. That being said I'm about to depart for good for now. That means I'm gonna drop off from Farms and what discord servers I've hanged out in, my socials, everything. I don't get better, my art skills are in stalemate because my irl job took everything from me for a while, leaving me overburned and unwilling to do anything. I did an art piece yesterday however, but this one was made to just piss off some people even if I had no intentions of that sort.
I need to sort myself and what I do out. Whenever I'll become happy living or deceased you'll get to know that. I'll make sure of that.
If someone wanted to dox me it's your time to shine. I know some would sure have grudge with or on me so it's your time to shine.
Here's my xitter.
Here's my burner for when I needed to adress false accusations in pedophilia that were coming from faggotry riddled retragames shithole servers such as Doom community ones and Civvie11's dungeon. After 3 years of doing fuck all since these accusations have happened because I haven't knew what to do and how to deal with this.
I post this willingly and full knowing the consequences of these decisions. If you want to tell I'm MATI or retarded you might be right or wrong, it doesn't really matter at this point. Whatever you'll make up from these is up to you, but I'm tired of battling my anxiety and feelings of guilt and hatred, of self-loathe because I feel them every single day for all my wrongs, unfullfilled life and understanding that the value of my life and of art endeavors that I've been doing for people are equal to absolute zero. That's a life to live, for sure. That's why I'm intend to drop all of it and just try to keep whatever left for me in this life. That being the job that seem to not want to let me go and my family, the one I was born in.
Farewell.
