Defendant: Ethan Oliver Ralph - Ethan Ralph's Documented Legal Troubles & Other Court Docs

[Keranu]

This is kind of random, but I had a realization. Ralph rarely talks about time in jail anymore, or at least not nearly as much as he used to, "the daily jail reference." Ralph talking about his jail stint was one of the very few redeemable things about his personality, if not the only.

Granted, it wouldn't be good material to talk about jail life every stream, but it was something that gave Ralph character. Actually that was really what made me interested in Ralph from the beginning, hearing him bring it up on his Dick Show debut.

Also random, we had long suspected Ralph had never worked a job in his life because he never, ever shared any work stories. You'd think something would have came up had he ever had a regular job like anyone else. But he could often mention something about his time served Lauden County jail.

 

[MeltyTW]

This is kind of random, but I had a realization. Ralph rarely talks about time in jail anymore, or at least not nearly as much as he used to, "the daily jail reference." Ralph talking about his jail stint was one of the very few redeemable things about his personality, if not the only.

Granted, it wouldn't be good material to talk about jail life every stream, but it was something that gave Ralph character. Actually that was really what made me interested in Ralph from the beginning, hearing him bring it up on his Dick Show debut.

Also random, we had long suspected Ralph had never worked a job in his life because he never, ever shared any work stories. You'd think something would have came up had he ever had a regular job like anyone else. But he could often mention something about his time served Lauden County jail.

please dont encourage him to bring that back, he did that for pity and always framed it as either a mistake punished too harshly (it wasnt he should have got more) or as complete bs on their part. all you need to know is that his negative reactions to prison rape jokes means he was probably thumbed up the butt by darkies.

 

[Tom Myers]

please dont encourage him to bring that back, he did that for pity and always framed it as either a mistake punished too harshly (it wasnt he should have got more) or as complete bs on their part. all you need to know is that his negative reactions to prison rape jokes means he was probably thumbed up the butt by darkies.

C'mon, he maybe tried to kick a cop while drunk. Dude is five one, can barely walk etc. A year in prison and a felony is a farce for that crime. The cops would just kick your ass here for that offense.

 

[Sam Losco]

That's a crime?

Can be. It's not like a cop is ever going to arrest you because they overheard you say fuck. It's more just something they can tack on as extra or use if you're being a belligerent drunk like Ralph.

 

[Kerr Avon]

This is kind of random, but I had a realization. Ralph rarely talks about time in jail anymore, or at least not nearly as much as he used to, "the daily jail reference." Ralph talking about his jail stint was one of the very few redeemable things about his personality, if not the only.

Granted, it wouldn't be good material to talk about jail life every stream, but it was something that gave Ralph character. Actually that was really what made me interested in Ralph from the beginning, hearing him bring it up on his Dick Show debut.

Also random, we had long suspected Ralph had never worked a job in his life because he never, ever shared any work stories. You'd think something would have came up had he ever had a regular job like anyone else. But he could often mention something about his time served Lauden County jail.

Keeeping that fresh in people's mind would taint any sort of custody or cs proceedings , the gunt might just be smart enough to realize that.

 

[High Tea]

This is kind of random, but I had a realization. Ralph rarely talks about time in jail anymore, or at least not nearly as much as he used to, "the daily jail reference." Ralph talking about his jail stint was one of the very few redeemable things about his personality, if not the only.

Granted, it wouldn't be good material to talk about jail life every stream, but it was something that gave Ralph character. Actually that was really what made me interested in Ralph from the beginning, hearing him bring it up on his Dick Show debut.

Also random, we had long suspected Ralph had never worked a job in his life because he never, ever shared any work stories. You'd think something would have came up had he ever had a regular job like anyone else. But he could often mention something about his time served Lauden County jail.

He's trying to rebrand with the KS ap. He's had several legal issues since. It's harder to sell a drunken mistake if you keep having interactions with the law. Better to just ignore it.

Ralph has said he's never worked a 'real job' in his life. He's proud of it.

 

[TwoDollarPeePeePooPoo]

C'mon, he maybe tried to kick a cop while drunk. Dude is five one, can barely walk etc. A year in prison and a felony is a farce for that crime. The cops would just kick your ass here for that offense.

Even by the point he punched the cop, Ralph was a repeat offender. It wasn’t the first time he was arrested nor was it his first mugshot. He’s also a belligerent drunk and likely kept jabbering at the cop pre and post assault. He should be happy it wasn’t longer.

 

[MeltyTW]

C'mon, he maybe tried to kick a cop while drunk. Dude is five one, can barely walk etc. A year in prison and a felony is a farce for that crime. The cops would just kick your ass here for that offense.

and hes only gotten worse since he left, no i think if youre at the point your first instinct is to drunkenly beat a female cop for mildly inconveniencing you in your soulless piggy brained rage you should have the book thrown at you 100 percent no joke.

 

[Ralphamale]

Even by the point he punched the cop, Ralph was a repeat offender. It wasn’t the first time he was arrested nor was it his first mugshot. He’s also a belligerent drunk and likely kept jabbering at the cop pre and post assault. He should be happy it wasn’t longer.

Ralph mentioned being very belligerent on the car ride to the police HQ. The charge must stem from that. Sad we don't have the audio from the car ride to hear what gems Ralph dropped. Telling the cop she's furious she isn't riding his yuge dick of the Ralphamale!

 

[Mundane Ralph]

C'mon, he maybe tried to kick a cop while drunk. Dude is five one, can barely walk etc. A year in prison and a felony is a farce for that crime. The cops would just kick your ass here for that offense.

Correction: he tried to punch a cop and missed but when the cop was putting him in the car he successfully kicked them.

 

[MeltyTW]

Correction: he tried to punch a cop and missed but when the cop was putting him in the car he successfully kicked them.

i thought he said he also failed to kick them.

 

[Mundane Ralph]

i thought he said he also failed to kick them.

He denied ever trying to kick them. He said they just made that up. So I take that to mean he definitely kicked them.

 

[RichardRApe]

He denied ever trying to kick them. He said they just made that up. So I take that to mean he definitely kicked them.

Ralph mentioned being very belligerent on the car ride to the police HQ. The charge must stem from that.

We have newly released video from a FOIA request.

 

[Anstiv]

It wouldn't surprise me one bit if he ends up killing someone with his car one day. He drunk drives all the time.

The most kino ending. Imagine waking up one day and you see featured on the front page "Ethan Oliver Ralph has killed someone in a car accident"

 

[TheShedCollector]

He was going over 90. I got pulled over going 25 miles over the speed limit when I was 19 and the cop booked it at 24 so he wouldn't have to arrest me for reckless driving.

(Which is fucking bullshit anyways. That road is a 3 lane highway nobody uses at night, but it has heavy traffic during the day, so they give it a 45 MPH speed limit when it should be 60 at night.)

60mph on a three lane highway? The minimum speed limit should be 120mph,.

 

[MeltyTW]

60mph on a three lane highway? The minimum speed limit should be 120mph,.

it should be changed to whatever inconveniences gunt more at the time.

 

[Cherenkovblue]

Ralph mentioned being very belligerent on the car ride to the police HQ. The charge must stem from that. Sad we don't have the audio from the car ride to hear what gems Ralph dropped. Telling the cop she's furious she isn't riding his yuge dick of the Ralphamale!

I think we both know him in the back of a cop car being belligerent consists of him violently gassing the cops in the front seat. The miracle is he wasn't slapped with an additional charge of assault with a deadly weapon.

 

[Paddy O' Furniture]

Why would Ralph be speeding to see his mom? He wasn't allowed to see her unless he got a vaccination, which we know he didn't. I guess he probably thought (yet again) he was allowed because he's special. Don't forget your helmet next time, sells it better.

 

[AltisticRight]

Why would Ralph be speeding to see his mom? He wasn't allowed to see her unless he got a vaccination, which we know he didn't. I guess he probably thought (yet again) he was allowed because he's special. Don't forget your helmet next time, sells it better.

Interesting question indeed. But it should be "why would Ralph have to speed to see his mum"?
Shouldn't he... be by her side, like the good son he self-proclaims, hm?
Biggest joke of the year, Ralph loves is mother.

 

[Keranu]

please dont encourage him to bring that back, he did that for pity and always framed it as either a mistake punished too harshly (it wasnt he should have got more) or as complete bs on their part. all you need to know is that his negative reactions to prison rape jokes means he was probably thumbed up the butt by darkies.

No, no, he can't bring it back. I'm just saying the whole jail thing gave Ralph character. We're talking about a (then) 30 year old man who never had a job before or any real life experience. To spend time in an environment most of us are not familiar with made Ralph unique. Aside from that, what else could you really have said about Ralph if you didn't know what a piece of shit he actually was?