Disney General - The saddest fandom on Earth

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Which is Better

  • Chicken Little

    Votes: 433 27.5%

  • Hunchback 2

    Votes: 57 3.6%

  • A slow death

    Votes: 1,086 68.9%
  • Total voters
    1,576
Calandrino said:
I'm amused that Chris Sanders was so taken by these quaint little native things like ohana and hula dancing and the mythology and so on. Then we let the Authentic Indigenous voice do his version, and he gives very few fucks about any of that kitschy tourist stuff, and alters the story to be about consuming social services.
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Early to mid 2000s Disney was alot more experimental. You had Brother Bear doing Inuits and a story about patience, brotherhood and how emotions and ironically “toxic masculinity” can lead to self-desttuction. Even something like Meet the Robinsons pushes the message of not letting your past life or failures keep you down. No modern writer is going to go for any of that now when it would oddly enough be more progressive and original. Its just remakes, sequels and forgettable slop like Onward, Turning Red, Elio and other nonsense.
 
People keep asking for it, but can you imagine how terrible a modern Disney version of Atlantis would be?

Can you imagine how insufferable Sweet (half black half native American doctor whose main personality is being nice) and Audrey (tomboy mechanical genius Latina) would be?

How would they completely rewrite the Atlantians so their demise wasn't their fault and they don't need help from these outsiders? How many lectures would Milo get despite already being a very flawed character who needs help a lot?

Would Helga throw Rourke out of the balloon and completely overtake him as the final obstacle?

How much would they cut the story to ribbons for being too scary?

Who would they race swap?

After "ohana means see ya later maybe" I don't think it's possible to strawman their stupidity; anything goes.
 

“I can’t believe Nani gave Lilo up for adoption.”​

oh wow. I mean yeah what an amazing twist

“this new movie is a travesty, the point of the original was ‘Ohana means family, but in this new movie, Nani gives Lilo to the state and goes to college.’” - all influencers currently

oh gee yeah what a travesty. man I never thought about it that way, huh, I guess it is the exact opposite of the first movie. man, I… I wish someone had like…warned me. Before anyone had to like spend money on it. I wish someone out here had said, “hey, this movie is going to suck so just don’t go.” I wish someone had warned me before influencers could earn their keep by paying Disney to make movies they can create hate-content about for the price of admission. Like if only somebody had said “this movie is going to invert and destroy the movie you actually like and get you to pay for it by playing the music you love and flashing a cute bunny-puppy named Stitch in front of you”. I mean. If only there were some way we could like. Be able to tell. That the movie is going to be a bottomless roast of the original. BEFORE anyone had to buy a ticket. If only we could have FIGURED THAT OUT without going to actually see and therefore support the movie. If only we could. Like, watch the old movie. See very clearly what was good about it. Just a few really good things we could see. Like, maybe by watching the first movie. And then easily be able to tell, maybe from like, changes made in the trailer or the casting list. That this remake is going to ruin it. Stuff like that, if we could do that, maybe nobody would’ve watched it. What a world it would be if that were only possible.
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why did you. YOU. Have to PAY FOR. a ticket to see a movie where Nani goes to college and leaves Lilo to the state, in order to realize that this movie was going to be a terrible remake? why is that the price you had to pay to figure it out?! Why did it take them ruining the simplest, leanest, no-fat-on-it, most original, most tight, clear, funny, quirky, charming, heartfelt, soulful, passion-project of a Disney movie, for you to see that they’re going to do this every single time? As long as you buy a ticket?
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"Yes, Tumblr female. Let the hate flow."
 
Lilo & Stitch seems tied with Lion King and Mulan for the most despised remake online. L&S being Disney's most popular animated film from the '00s meant a remake would more than likely do gangbusters, but it simultaneously meant way more people would find out JUST how horrible the film is. The disdain is, as per usual, absolutely warranted. Any defense for the film comes from people that know deep down it's an uglier repackaging of a film that's nearly 25-years old but they'll say "kids are stupid, they won't know the difference!"

These remakes exist to become footnotes.
 
Commander X said:
Lilo & Stitch seems tied with Lion King and Mulan for the most despised remake online. L&S being Disney's most popular animated film from the '00s meant a remake would more than likely do gangbusters, but it simultaneously meant way more people would find out JUST how horrible the film is. The disdain is, as per usual, absolutely warranted. Any defense for the film comes from people that know deep down it's an uglier repackaging of a film that's nearly 25-years old but they'll say "kids are stupid, they won't know the difference!"

These remakes exist to become footnotes.
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I'll defend Mulan despite it being shit because they did at least try something different. Plus that cast is epic. It may be trash but it's my trash. But then you remember even stuff like Dumbo got a live action remake by Tim Burton no less. I can't remember if it was he that said the remake was a mistake or not.

Beauty and the Beast was shit because of the damned autotune and Emma Watson being a terribly cast Belle. I didn't see The Jungle Book but I heard it was good...although aren't there like two versions besides the original?

The saddest thing is when you realize The Lion King made more money than anyone expected despite it being a pointless and shitty CGI mess. Or Jay-Z bribed them. God help the Robin Hood fucks when they decide to remake that one.
 
Newcomer 42 said:
Wait what, Elvis is censored? How and why? Stitch's cosplay was one of the funniest parts! And yet, this remake is considered good by the normies? Truly, they have single-digit IQ numbers.
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Thinking back to Elvis, it reminded me of being in the car with dad recently, and he had on SiriusXM's "50's on FIVE" and having to hear Pat Boone doing one of Little Richard's songs and it felt weird to me after years of litening to the original, yet I could see why my dad was into it for not having the same background my mom did with Black music.

I suppose in a way, Elvis' legacy is quickly leaving us now, left to linger on in the faded memories of the elderly while his likeness to being used to sell whiskey.
 
Vyse Inglebard said:
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Personally, this was my first Disney LA remake. I didn't anticipate anything great, but there's not much in the original that runs contrary to modern sensibilities, so I thought they would just take out the Elvis references and humorous crossdressing and call it a day. Needless to say, my expectations were greatly exceeded.

Newcomer 42 said:
Wait what, Elvis is censored? How and why? Stitch's cosplay was one of the funniest parts! And yet, this remake is considered good by the normies? Truly, they have single-digit IQ numbers.
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fwiw, Elvis is still in there, but very downplayed. I don't think you ever hear his name or see an image of him, but he's on the soundtrack and Stitch does cosplay during the end credits. It might be something they "fixed" in postproduction, after test screenings. It's got that vibe, anyway.
 
Judge Holden said:
That shit is gonna be for furries what Black Panther was for WEWUZ niggers
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That propaganda was hilarious. If I made a movie about niggers taking 60,000 years to turn a spear into a super spear, I'd have an ADL kosher calling for my head. I say thank God for the hollykin pumping so many roids into their black angel that he bit it. Because these kikes 110% wanted to turn that nigger into black superman.
 
Newcomer 42 said:
Technically, already a thing, but not by Disney.

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God I remember that. It rightly got shit for a good while and then just kinda dropped off the face of the earth. Probably, I stopped paying attention. But yeah, the hood rat protagonists all wear neon animal masks that are clearly supposed to reference the Disney movie.
 
Disney won't do Robin Hood cause they're banking on Zootopia for their worldwide furfag appeal. I mean the first trailer literally had a gigachad horse like the memes. They've had 9 and a half years to know their audience and what they want.
 
Kari Kamiya said:
I almost choked given how Chris Sanders looks lol.

But yes, while he wanted to celebrate Hawaii, he especially has a thing for them thicc Hawaiian girls and wanted to showcase that. Something tells me the people involved in the remake didn't like that.
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The original had plenty of Hawaiian involvement, too. There was that children’s chorus that performed a few songs, and some of the cast members were from the state (I know Nani’s is, I think David’s was too?). The actors actually helped doctor the script to make it sound more “authentic.”

Sanders definitely loves his Nani looking ladies, but the actual product was full of love that is completely absent in the remake despite the script coming from a Hawaiian resident. It feels less of a love letter to Hawaii and more a hatred of it.

BigBadBastich said:
Its made worse by the fact that Lilo is also lonely and has interests and beliefs that are considered bizarre and unconventional by everyone around her, besides her sister and the aliens who later become apart of her family. Shes also grieving the recent deaths of her parents. Leaving your actual small child sister during the most crucial and in her personal case, traumatic portion of their life is downright evil in any context. And remember in the original, Cobra only takes Lilo away after their entire house is blown to hell while Nani is away.
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And Nani was only away to very quickly take a job offer to better care for her sister, no less. Which made that scene all the more heart wrenching.

Commander X said:
Lilo & Stitch seems tied with Lion King and Mulan for the most despised remake online. L&S being Disney's most popular animated film from the '00s meant a remake would more than likely do gangbusters, but it simultaneously meant way more people would find out JUST how horrible the film is. The disdain is, as per usual, absolutely warranted. Any defense for the film comes from people that know deep down it's an uglier repackaging of a film that's nearly 25-years old but they'll say "kids are stupid, they won't know the difference!"

These remakes exist to become footnotes.
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While the direct to video sequels weren’t much better, some of them had purpose in continuing the story, or were more or less watchable (even in a trainwreck way). Like Little Mermaid II isn’t great. Still was interesting enough to see Ariel try to be a protective mother to Melody, knowing how she was like at her age and that Ursula’s sister was after her, only to try to fix everything when she overcompensated. The closest thing to a mother-daughter Goofy Movie equivalent Disney has made.

The Little Mermaid live action remake, meanwhile, better fleshed out Eric and Ariel’s relationship, but that’s literally the only point I can give it. It’s forgettable and often painful to watch otherwise. It, like all of these live action remakes, has the exact same problems where it not only tries to fix what isn’t broke, but holds complete contempt of its audience in the process.

The Lilo and Stitch remake isn’t any different. Actually, it didn’t just meet my low expectations. It exceeded them. Talk about hatred for your audience and legacy.
 
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