Opinion Don’t Take The $5000 Bribe

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Don’t Take The $5000 Bribe​

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Don’t take the $5000 bribe. Now, what I call a bribe, the White House calls a ‘dividend’. According to Forbes, “Elon Musk, head of the Department of Government Efficiency, hinted at the possibility of issuing $5,000 checks to American taxpayers—a concept dubbed the ‘DOGE Dividend.’ This proposal, originating from investment firm CEO and DOGE adviser James Fishback, suggests allocating 20% of DOGE’s projected savings and distributing it to taxpaying households.” When I issue the warning — don’t take the $5000 bribe! — what am I trying to say to you? Well, read on.

The Two-Bump Pickpocket​

Have you ever been pick-pocketed on a crowded city sidewalk? You get bumped twice. First, the decoy bumps you on your left shoulder. You turn immediately to the left. The decoy on the left grabs your attention by apologizing for the bump. While you’re conversing with the decoy, the second pickpocket removes the wallet from the right rear side of your pants. When you depart and walk on, you do not even realize you have been robbed.

Right now the Whitehouse is pickpocketing you, me, our nation, and the next two generations to come. How? The decoy is bumping us. The decory is drawing us to watch news about outrageous happenings in Washington such as the fireing of civil servants. Why are government workers losing their jobs? Because they are allegedly “lunatics,” “criminals,” and “vampires” who waste government money. On February 19, 2025, the current president announced that “We live in a corrupt country.” His country is corrupt, he says. This alleged corruption justifies eliminating jobs and plunging public discourse into confusion, chaos, and concealment. As you watch and listen, you are being secretly robbed.

There is a second decoy. The U.S. President has just announced that Ukraine’s president, Volodimer Zelenskyy, is a “dictator.” Furthermore, Zelenskyy is responsible for the war against Russia. This justifies a new alignment that unites Russia with America and both against not only Ukraine but also Europe. Are you outraged? If anything would draw your and my attention away from the theft of our wallet, this would.
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There is a third decoy. This is the most important decoy. Washington Republicans announce that with the help of DOGE they plan to balance the budget. The smokescreen of draconian cost-cutting is the principal decoy. How does this work? Even at the maximun, DOGE success could account for only a fraction of deficit spending with no repayment. Even the most optimistic expectation of cost-cutting would come as close to balancing the budget as a maple tree comes close to winning a spelling bee.

To make matters even more sinister, the White House is letting a near demonic temptation loose on the public, namely, the prospect that every income tax payer might receive a $5000 dividend from this fictitious cost-cutting. When you and I turn our heads to look toward a balanced budget and celebrate a net personal profit of $5000, we will not notice how our pocket is being picked. In fact, we’ll even take the bribe gladly so as to approve the gargantuan theft.

People are marching in cities across America. Protestors hold up signs that emphatically reject White House cost-cutting. So, in order to regain public support, the White House is dangling the $5000 in front of us.

Don’t Take the $5000 Bribe​

To take the $5000 bribe would amount to the first bump in a series. What’s the second bump? The second bump is the immediate theft of $4 trillion in national debt. While depositing your $5000 White House bribe, you might not notice that the national budget has not been balanced. You might not notice how the money that might have gone for services to your grandchildren and great-grandchildren will have been stolen by today’s Washington oligarchy. If you do notice, you’ll think of yourself as a beneficiary of the robbery. As complicit. As a co-conspiritor.
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I admonish you: do not believe the lie that the White House intends to balance the budget. What is the truth? The truth is that the Republicans plan to cut the tax rate to 15% on the billionairs who paid to put the 47th president in the White House. This amounts to a revenue loss of $4.5 trillion. Even if DOGE could save as much as $1.5 trillion, we must ask: who will pay the remaining $3 trillion? The answer: the national debt increase. Your and my progeny in the future will pay for the greed and luxury of today’s oligarchy.

The House GOP budget plan is awash in red ink. It includes increasing the national debt at a rate that will lead to a deficit of $150 trillion by midcentury.

By accepting the $5000 bribe today, you would become complicit in the largest corruption caper in America’s history. Because of the bribe, you would not want to vote against the briber. You might even approve a proposal to grant to the 47th president the Oval Office for life. You might be motivated by the vain hope that you’ll someday receive another $5000 bribe.

Conclusion​

Don’t take the $5000 bribe! For that matter, don’t watch the daily news that covers outrage after outrage. Each day’s outrage is a decoy, a diversion, a smokescreen. If you and I become fixated on the first bump, we will either not notice the second bump or we might approve of it with a gesture of gratitude for the bribe we have already taken.
 
I don't remember any articles telling people not to take covid stimmy checks, even though those were a product of money printer going brrrr and could only lead to worse inflation.
I don’t know about articles but there were quite a lot of social media posts talking about how folks accepting the checks didn’t deserve them and should refuse them or donate them to lefty charities and post pics afterwards. I actually know someone stupid enough to actually do that and try to guilt me over not doing the same. Hell, they were bitching because Trump’s name was on the check

Just checked and there were articles from back then about this very thing. Just search for “refuse stimulus check” and you’ll see what I mean.
 
Funny. I thought Patheos was a religion site, and they're on about a *possible* $5g tax refund. They're far too interested in my bank account.
 
The Jig is up and they are scared the infinite money for progs tap is about to be closed. Some of them should go to jail (they probably wont but they should). Also smart of musk to encourage the stupid dog with a 6 second attention span (the public) by rewarding it when it makes cuts. It seems kinda counter intuitive, the debt is so high, we have been spending this money for years and even if we stop today we will be paying it back for decades... but the dems have been giving out hot cheetos, cellphones and coca-cola for longer than I have been alive and the voterbase are watering the crops with brawndo at this point.
 
the second pickpocket removes the wallet from the right rear side of your pants
First off, that's not my wallet, that's just my large ass that I formed shitposting on Kiwifarms.

Second, I keep old snotty rags in my back pockets. Bet your buddy feels stupid pulling out wet Kleenex. Enjoy your 2-day illness. ;)

Wait, something just occured to me. Every adult American taxpayer is getting this, right? Last I checked, $5000 is more than $1700. Is this just a way to flush Social Security by going "Oh uh we overpaid you 3 months' worth of payment, fuck you, you're out." or am I just a turbofaggot too high on the hmm-ium? :thinking:
 
Just checked and there were articles from back then about this very thing. Just search for “refuse stimulus check” and you’ll see what I mean.
I searched your term and I'm seeing a variety of results but none to the flavor of, "DO NOT REDEEM SAAR” of this article. The majority of results were about what to do if you didn't receive it, people asking quora/reddit about what to do after it was sent to a closed account, one article that suggested donating, and one article on The New Yorker titled, ”Americans Adamantly Refuse to Cash Stimulus Checks Unless Republicans Are Onboard”. Maybe if I searched with google it would be different, but fuck google.
I don’t know about articles but there were quite a lot of social media posts
The farms is the only SM I've ever used aside from the one instance of me reading a reddit thread to try and work out a hardware issue, so I'll take you on your word on sites having those convos proliferate.
 
I don't know with 5 grand no strings attached I can get my credit fixed, buy a new gun, and still have like 3.5k to save up for a trip to Japan next year. Bring me the 5k return from my taxes. If that's how much money is actually being saved not going for trans comics in Peru and other things pleased guys I want my money.
 
Those $1,200 checks cost people way more than they got thanks to the inflation they caused. $5,000 would be even worse.

How about focus on using any cost savings to reduce the deficit so we stop pissing away nearly a trillion dollars on interest?
Here is the counterpoint to the argument, the money was already in the supply to begin with. In other words that 5 to 6k will end up being spent and giving Americans a necessary help up.
Second the deficit as we see it is caused by a spending problem and the military budget will have an axe taken to it.
Third this could be a temporary boon to the economy but it won't fix the structural issues with America in a still globalized world.
(Sorry for double post)
 
The author like quadruples down on this, which is insane. You can disagree where and how the cost cutting is taking place, but you can't disagree that it is in fact happening.
Stop by my Facebook sometime and watch all my TDS infected friends insist, with no evidence, that nothing is being cut...... but rather, all this "cut" money is being stuffed into big burlap sacks with "$" on the side, then gets taken out the front door by wheelbarrow and dumped into the back of Elon's Cybertruck....who drives away laughing while throwing the Nazi salute and crushing small animals under his tires.

Yes, they honestly want to believe this.

They'd rather believe their taxes have been outright STOLEN than barred from being WASTED.
 
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Here is the counterpoint to the argument, the money was already in the supply to begin with. In other words that 5 to 6k will end up being spent and giving Americans a necessary help up.
There's a big difference though, this is normally spent over the course of a year but in this case it'll being pumped into the economy all at once making it way more disruptive and inflationary. A lot of it will just go towards buying foreign imports, worsening the trade deficit and sending dollars overseas.

If we're going to spend it again vs. cut the deficit, at least invest it. Hell, establish a sovereign wealth fund to support Americans' SS payments.

Second the deficit as we see it is caused by a spending problem and the military budget will have an axe taken to it.
Third this could be a temporary boon to the economy but it won't fix the structural issues with America in a still globalized world.
(Sorry for double post)
If there's truly $800 billion in savings we can cut the deficit on a permanent basis by more than half. The interest payments draining so much money away from the budget will only hurt more if interest rates increase again to counter inflation.
 
Stop by my Facebook sometime and watch all my TDS infected friends insist, with no evidence, that nothing is being cut...... but rather, all this "cut" money is being stuffed into big burlap sacks with "$" on the side, then gets taken out the front door by wheelbarrow and dumped into the back of Elon's Cybertruck.....they honestly want to believe this more than the fact their money is not being wasted.
It is easier to tell a dude that there is a hair brained scheme out there screwing him or some big malicious plan then the fact that they the good smart people got duped.
I got duped I used to be a Neo con believe in muh American dream spiel, I thought muh free markets fix things and we shouldn't have government except for the pentagon because that institution was sacred.
Most people still want to believe that there is an evil nazi cabal out there then the reality of their sides corruption has gone on for so long they don't even see it as corruption anymore.
 
It sounds like they're trying to devalue the currency to address the US debt. If you have savings, buy precious metals or transfer it to a more stable currency.
 
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