It's true, all of it.
The Romans knew the Jews owned the letter 'U', so what did they do? They boycotted it, they made V do double duty. But of course, we all know what happened to Rome...
But could a single letter satisfy bottomless avarice? Preposterous! So they mandated that the letter Q, itself a wholesome and blameless character, should be forever married to the base U. Miscegenation of the second worst sort!
If only that were the end! Feckless bankers, ever hungering for the dividends of noble labor, sought to increase their grasp over our fair language: to this end, the most unnatural "Double-U!" Have you never thought it strange that in an alphabet composed of 26 letters, "U" makes up three of them?
But I noticed something even more disturbing in the tax code just passed in the American Senate. Didn't you think it was strange that handwritten additions were being included in our code of laws? Don't you think that might allow something to slip in, something not normally represented in our 26 Characters and 50 States? Something, that looks like THIS?
This is the clearest evidence to date that the Judocrats in Washkenazi D.C. are trying to push something even more insidious into our language-- the "TripleU." Possibly even QuadrU, the experts are still running their analysis.
But there's no time for us to sit and try to understand this problem- we must act, immediately and decisively! U's WILL NOT REPLACE US!
