Apologies for the double post, but
The Brain of Morbius is done.
We have another authorship controversy, the third one is as many stories I've looked at. The episode's credited to "Robin Bland", but Terrance Dicks wrote the original script. The overall story was very similar, but rather than the scientist Solon, a faulty robot was putting Morbius back together. Robert Holmes rewrote the script to remove the robot and Dicks threw a hissy fit because he thought it didn't make any sense that Solon would know how to build a better body for Morbius (he does kind of have a point here, but at the same time it feels like splitting hairs or being difficult for the sake being difficult). Dicks asked Holmes to devise a "bland pseudonym for the story", hence where the name Robin Bland came from. It's an excellent piece of trolling on Holmes's part.
Grave of the kitbashes:
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This episode’s grisly as fuck. Not even five minutes in and we’ve already had a beheading where we see the decapitated head and body. Get fucked Mary Whitehouse.
The Doctor gets out an umbrella but doesn’t offer it to Sarah? Git.
Oh yuck, now we see the decapitated head being experimented on. This is some serious body horror for a family show.
Solon’s manservant is called
Condo?
“The silent gas dirigibles of the Hoothi.”
That one line spawned most of the plot for the novel
Love and War. In fact, as will be discussed later, the Virgin New Adventures owes most of its backstory to this episode.
2 Girls 1 Cup:
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I’m going to try and get all the bad head jokes out of the way now:
Solon wants to get a head.
Solon wants the Doctor to give him head.
The Doctor’s got a good head on his shoulders.
The Doctor’s going to head off Solon’s plans.
Alright, I’ll stop.
The planet they’re on is called:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=ajsNJtnUb7c
Solon’s an absinthe drinker. Figures:
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I like how the Doctor looks like an absolute chad at the moment when Maren remarks how he thinks he’s safe in Solon’s castle:
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Solon: “I always knew one day I’d have a guest with a head for such a fine vintage.”
Dammit Solon, I was trying to get all the head jokes out of the way earlier.
Oh dear, the special effects for the door swinging open, the chandelier falling down and the sheet being blown off the clay head are hilariously hokey.
Remember when I was talking about
The Mind of Evil and I commented on the bad blocking in one scene where I said an actor’s face was obscured by a bunch of wires? Something similar happens here where Solon’s hidden behind the absinthe bottle, but he randomly reaches out and moves it out of the way for no reason in the context of the episode. If you look at Philip Madoc’s face while he does it, you can see him glance at the camera as if to say: “You done fucked up props department. Don’t get in the way of my performance.”
The Doctor’s a lightweight. One glass of absinthe and he’s out. I know it’s potent stuff, but still.
Clever girl Sarah. Pretending to be knocked out by the absinthe so she can run around freely when no-one’s there.
“Condo clogged the toilet, and all I have to clear it is the world’s smallest plunger.”:
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Solon may be the greatest neurosurgeon in the galaxy, but he just missed Sarah’s obvious hiding place. It’s even more egregious because he looked behind him and still didn’t see her:
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Solon: “I can see that you chicken brain biological disaster.”
Adding that to my list of insults.
Solon: “That drug. Did you put it
all into the wine?”
I like the implication that Condo’s been trying the merchandise.
Solon’s just described the Sisterhood of Karn as a “squalid brood of harpies” and Maren as an “accursed hag” and a “palsied harridan”. I’d love to see him in a rap battle.
The Sisterhood’s weapons of choice are foam Bionicle swords from Legoland. How threatening:
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The Doctor: “How did you get her here by the way?”
Ohica: “The power of the Sisterhood”
TESTIFY SISTAH!
Kiss the ring:
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Sarah’s doing a great job this episode. First she fooled Solon into thinking she was drugged and now she’s snuck into the Sisterhood’s sanctum in disguise to free the Doctor.
Solon’s face upon seeing the Doctor sitting at his dining table again is pure “Well this is awkward”:
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Another “What are you doing here?” That montage was right. It
does crop up a lot.
Huh. Was Morbius a prototype for Lady Cassandra?:
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How did Condo beat the Doctor to the Sisterhood with the letter? He must be the greatest postman in the galaxy.
Solon just got his ass kicked by a blind girl who managed to lock him in his own lab. I say again, he may be the greatest neurosurgeon in the galaxy, but he’s a fucking moron.
Karn just isn’t as spooky in the daytime:
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The Doctor just told everyone to stand back. Is he going to light one of his farts to get the flame started up again?
Oh, the Doctor cleared some soot out and the flame started up again. So essentially he’s been reduced to an intergalactic chimney sweep.
Morbius: “You have the girl, use her head!”
Solon: “The female braincase is too small!”
You sexist pig Solon.
Lol, Condo looks like Vee:
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Solon is now enlisting the help of a blind girl after shooting his assistant. He really isn’t too bright is he?
The cliffhangers in this story have a nice thematic link. The first one was with the body of Morbius, the second one was with the brain, and the third is with the two combined.
Morbius has just smashed a mirror. I’m sure he won’t have any bad luck in the near future.
That Sister just sat there and let Morbius grab her and strangle her to death. Run for it you idiot!
The Doctor actually expected Solon to disconnect Morbius’s brain if left to his own devices? For a story about a brain, everyone sure has caught a dose of stupid.
The Doctor just gassed Solon to death. Brutal.
They really are leaning on the Frankenstein imagery for this one:
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The Doctor just commented that the reason Morbius survived his gas attack is because his lungs have a methane filter. Must. Resist. Second... fart joke.
Solon has some Tribbles in his lab:
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It's impossible to discuss this episode without talking about the infamous mind bending sequence. If you don't know anything about this, the Doctor and Morbius have a mind battle where they end up visualising each other's past regenerations. We see Morbius's body before the Frankenstein one, then the Doctors all the way back to William Hartnell and then eight more faces after that. Philip Hinchcliffe (who appeared as one of the faces along with other production staff when they couldn't get any actors to do it) admitted that he was trying to imply there were Doctors before Hartnell, but later stories ignored this scene altogether and it was still taken as given that Hartnell was the first Doctor. Classic
Who's final script editor Andrew Cartmell eventually decided to try and tackle the problem this sequence presented head-on with what was known as "The Cartmell Masterplan" The show was cancelled before it could be fully implemented, but it was folded into the storyline of the Virgin New Adventures. I won't go into the Cartmell Masterplan too much here. If you don't what it entailed, it's not too hard to research. All I'll say is, this story provided the jumping off point for a lot of the expanded Time Lord mythos seen in the New Adventures.
Another thing I have to say about this sequence is that people who defend "The Timeless Children" often point to it as a precedent for introducing a major change to the show's continuity. To those people I say no, this is not remotely comparable to what happened in "The Timeless Children". Setting aside that "The Timeless Children" is an appalling episode even discounting that abominable "twist", the twist itself is a vital part of the episode. It's front and centre, and integral to what can laughingly be called the story. The mind bending sequence was a tantalising little easter egg that lasted little more than a minute and was never mentioned again. You could completely ignore it if you wanted to, and the explanation for it was in sources that were ambiguously canon (and the explanation was ambiguous in and of itself) meaning you could disregard it if you so chose. You can't do that with "The Timeless Children" because as I said, the backstory mangling is central to that episode. We're stuck with it unless someone decides to do a major retcon.
Ugh, back to this story. I need to clear my palate after talking about "The Timeless Children".
Poor old Morbius. Gets his body back for all of 10 minutes before being knocked to his doom Emperor Palpatine style. His manner of death’s even funnier when you consider the guy playing him is called Stuart Fell (who was a prolific stuntman - talk about nominative determinism):
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“You have chosen... wisely.”:
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This is a great story, and an archetypal Hinchcliffe one at that. A classically told horror/mad scientist story that works very well as a
Doctor Who riff on
Frankenstein. The only thing I'm slightly sad about is I couldn't fit in a
Dad's Army joke, but Philip Madoc was one of the most prolific (if not
the most prolific) Classic
Who guest actors ever, so I'm sure there'll be other chances. If I ever get round to reviewing
The Krotons, I'll definitely be referencing one of his other comedy roles...
I've done stories for the Third, Fourth, Fifth and Sixth Doctor so far. Next time I'll try and kill two (or one depending on how you look at it) birds with one stone and tackle my favourite anniversary/multi-Doctor story. I of course mean
The Five Doctors.