Hi. I’m cblaze. I’d like to talk to all you guys about myself, and this community, and what I’ve learned throughout these few years. I’m not actually anybody, I’m just a guy who found out about this forum just recently, when the wiki linked to the post about Null closing down the private forum.
I found out about Chris because of the tvtropes page, before it was censored. It linked to the wiki, and it was entertaining to read. The chronicle of Chris-chan’s life had it all. Thrills, quests, adversaries and status-quo. I don’t think I felt happy reading it, but it was a great read.
I was content to lurk. I don’t know why I was so fascinated about his life until recently, when I began reasoning that I might be autistic, myself. I dunno, in the country I live, stuff like that doesn’t get diagnosed. I was just that weird kid with weird little thoughts that had trouble making friends. I’m not really sure about myself. I read about Chris’ life, and I was particularly interested in the “Chris and x” series. You all made fun of him, and so did I, but deep down, I could vaguely understand why he was doing all that shit.
I mean, I didn’t approve, but I could see where he was coming from. Take the love quest, for example. I was lucky enough to find my own sweetheart in high school, but if I hadn’t, I can just as easily see myself growing to be desperate enough to actually consider making an attraction sign. Not enough to actually go through with it, though.
His whole “Sonichu characters are real, somewhere” shtick. Like, I remember having imaginary friends as a kid in the form of some animal plushies I used to play with. Imagining them having their own little worlds and thoughts and adventures even when I wasn’t around was just comforting and it made me happy. I remember playing Pokemon Gold, and being devastated when I found out the save battery eventually dies and all your pokemon dissapear. I was kinda glad when I lost the cartridge, as I thought at least that way the little critters would get a chance at not being permanently deleted. I don’t think Chris actually believes his recolors are real as much as he desperately wants them to be.
The “biological-clock”? Hell, I’ve said the same things to my friends on occasion. I go to college during the afternoons, and it’s really screwing up my already bad sleeping habiys.
My point is, the crap he says that sounds insane to the majority of readers, it makes sense to me, in a warped, corrupted kind of way.
Anyway, I loved reading about his life, but it scared me to think that he was way too similar in certain aspects to me. I was content to see his own shenanigans, but reading about the trollings, the Julie incident in particular was cringe-worthy. It hit too close to home, if you know what I mean. I’ve dealt with bullies pretending to be girls that like me, and it’s devastating. You can say that Chris-chan just doesn’t learn any lessons and that it didn’t bother him in the slightest to learn that the new love of his life was just a sadistic 13-year old pretending to have phone sex, but he’s a human being. No amount of autism will let you not feel the pain of betrayal. Friends of mine think I don’t actually have emotions, just like you think Chris’ heart level can never go lower than zero, but that’s far from the truth.
Still, this might seem like I’m antagonizing you. I’m really not. Hell, I believe that whole saga made even the a-loggiest of trolls think twice of messing with that guy’s life. The no-trolling clause took effect soon after that, and I was content.
Like I said, I’m not actually sure I’m autistic. I sure wouldn’t want to be, but that doesn’t change the fact that I feel I have a certain kinship with CWC. I might even have been a lolcow, but I’m a bit too shy to upload videos of myself. Some guy at college the other was diagnosing me with autism, and even if he did have a lot of valid points, all I told him is that it doesn’t really matter to me. He said that a general indifference was another symptom, and it made me remember how a lot of the mailbag’s questions were just answered with “whatever”.
I don’t really know what point I’m trying to make, actually. It’s just that after Null’s announcement that the private forum is going down, I feel like it’s the beginning of the end of the CWC saga. I wanted to give a few parting words to the whole thing.
I read the Simonla article, and it raises an interesting point that when the trolls forced Chris to kill her, it meant his own private paradise was no longer his. No matter how hard he tried to retcon it and how hard he punished the troll's characters, his sanctuary was forever defiled. They killed his only source of creative output, shitty as it may have been, and forced him to turn inwards towards himself, and become a recluse.
Truth is, there’s no longer any thrills to be had. The quest for love, or at least for his virginity, is long over. The adversaries he’s had lately are either tragedies like death, near poverty or his house burning down, or minor inconveniences like his favorite character’s arm color or a taint piercing. The status-quo has changed, and it’s a depressing one.
I lurked throughout the wiki whenever I was feeling depressed about myself, seeing Chris’ failures cheered me up. Now, it’s all so sad. Catherine was fake? That’s downright depressing, fellow forum-goers. Why would you troll like that? Let the man be his own source of fail.
Let the wiki stand tall, a testament of one man’s hilarity and failures and victories and so many, many defeats. Let the forum remain, a source of stories of the golden-age of trolling and the occasional update. Let all the trolls who still have fantasies of the second coming of Clyde Cash and more humiliations scatter away without a purpose and their fantasies remaining just that, fantasies. Above all, let the poor manchild do his best to live in a world where anybody can look up damn near his entire life’s failures. It might sound weird coming from a (possible) autistic, but try putting yourselves in his shoes.
I learned a great deal about what NOT to do in life, love and the internet, thanks to this great big manchild and this great community. For all that, I’m grateful, and I for one welcome this brave new future where we can simply move on from the dead horse that has become the Christian Weston Chandler saga.
I apologize for the lengthy post, and I thank anybody who sat through it. If it weren’t for the community, I wouldn’t have had any point of reference for my own mental health, and so many hours idly spent indulging my voyeuristic habits.
I found out about Chris because of the tvtropes page, before it was censored. It linked to the wiki, and it was entertaining to read. The chronicle of Chris-chan’s life had it all. Thrills, quests, adversaries and status-quo. I don’t think I felt happy reading it, but it was a great read.
I was content to lurk. I don’t know why I was so fascinated about his life until recently, when I began reasoning that I might be autistic, myself. I dunno, in the country I live, stuff like that doesn’t get diagnosed. I was just that weird kid with weird little thoughts that had trouble making friends. I’m not really sure about myself. I read about Chris’ life, and I was particularly interested in the “Chris and x” series. You all made fun of him, and so did I, but deep down, I could vaguely understand why he was doing all that shit.
I mean, I didn’t approve, but I could see where he was coming from. Take the love quest, for example. I was lucky enough to find my own sweetheart in high school, but if I hadn’t, I can just as easily see myself growing to be desperate enough to actually consider making an attraction sign. Not enough to actually go through with it, though.
His whole “Sonichu characters are real, somewhere” shtick. Like, I remember having imaginary friends as a kid in the form of some animal plushies I used to play with. Imagining them having their own little worlds and thoughts and adventures even when I wasn’t around was just comforting and it made me happy. I remember playing Pokemon Gold, and being devastated when I found out the save battery eventually dies and all your pokemon dissapear. I was kinda glad when I lost the cartridge, as I thought at least that way the little critters would get a chance at not being permanently deleted. I don’t think Chris actually believes his recolors are real as much as he desperately wants them to be.
The “biological-clock”? Hell, I’ve said the same things to my friends on occasion. I go to college during the afternoons, and it’s really screwing up my already bad sleeping habiys.
My point is, the crap he says that sounds insane to the majority of readers, it makes sense to me, in a warped, corrupted kind of way.
Anyway, I loved reading about his life, but it scared me to think that he was way too similar in certain aspects to me. I was content to see his own shenanigans, but reading about the trollings, the Julie incident in particular was cringe-worthy. It hit too close to home, if you know what I mean. I’ve dealt with bullies pretending to be girls that like me, and it’s devastating. You can say that Chris-chan just doesn’t learn any lessons and that it didn’t bother him in the slightest to learn that the new love of his life was just a sadistic 13-year old pretending to have phone sex, but he’s a human being. No amount of autism will let you not feel the pain of betrayal. Friends of mine think I don’t actually have emotions, just like you think Chris’ heart level can never go lower than zero, but that’s far from the truth.
Still, this might seem like I’m antagonizing you. I’m really not. Hell, I believe that whole saga made even the a-loggiest of trolls think twice of messing with that guy’s life. The no-trolling clause took effect soon after that, and I was content.
Like I said, I’m not actually sure I’m autistic. I sure wouldn’t want to be, but that doesn’t change the fact that I feel I have a certain kinship with CWC. I might even have been a lolcow, but I’m a bit too shy to upload videos of myself. Some guy at college the other was diagnosing me with autism, and even if he did have a lot of valid points, all I told him is that it doesn’t really matter to me. He said that a general indifference was another symptom, and it made me remember how a lot of the mailbag’s questions were just answered with “whatever”.
I don’t really know what point I’m trying to make, actually. It’s just that after Null’s announcement that the private forum is going down, I feel like it’s the beginning of the end of the CWC saga. I wanted to give a few parting words to the whole thing.
I read the Simonla article, and it raises an interesting point that when the trolls forced Chris to kill her, it meant his own private paradise was no longer his. No matter how hard he tried to retcon it and how hard he punished the troll's characters, his sanctuary was forever defiled. They killed his only source of creative output, shitty as it may have been, and forced him to turn inwards towards himself, and become a recluse.
Truth is, there’s no longer any thrills to be had. The quest for love, or at least for his virginity, is long over. The adversaries he’s had lately are either tragedies like death, near poverty or his house burning down, or minor inconveniences like his favorite character’s arm color or a taint piercing. The status-quo has changed, and it’s a depressing one.
I lurked throughout the wiki whenever I was feeling depressed about myself, seeing Chris’ failures cheered me up. Now, it’s all so sad. Catherine was fake? That’s downright depressing, fellow forum-goers. Why would you troll like that? Let the man be his own source of fail.
Let the wiki stand tall, a testament of one man’s hilarity and failures and victories and so many, many defeats. Let the forum remain, a source of stories of the golden-age of trolling and the occasional update. Let all the trolls who still have fantasies of the second coming of Clyde Cash and more humiliations scatter away without a purpose and their fantasies remaining just that, fantasies. Above all, let the poor manchild do his best to live in a world where anybody can look up damn near his entire life’s failures. It might sound weird coming from a (possible) autistic, but try putting yourselves in his shoes.
I learned a great deal about what NOT to do in life, love and the internet, thanks to this great big manchild and this great community. For all that, I’m grateful, and I for one welcome this brave new future where we can simply move on from the dead horse that has become the Christian Weston Chandler saga.
I apologize for the lengthy post, and I thank anybody who sat through it. If it weren’t for the community, I wouldn’t have had any point of reference for my own mental health, and so many hours idly spent indulging my voyeuristic habits.
