Ethan Ralph, Fugitive from Justice

[Estate]

When you're Ralph and you wish to be famous and suddenly a Monkey Paw curls it's finger among the clanking of piss bottles.

 

[LaxerBRO]

Hoping for an Interpol Red Notice.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

Is there a particular reason this was made a national warrant?

Ralph went out of his way to be a nuisance in several legal proceedings so naturally the court wants to make an example out of someone who hide behind a computer screen.

 

[Dixieland Buckaroo]

I can't believe the State of Minnesota will probably win The Great Gunt Hunt. I thought we were the best, fellow kiwi bros.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

I’m convinced Nick paid for Ralph’s trip to MN and to be his “secret weapon” in the war against Aaron.

Ralph making a trip to MN was very sus to begin with, he had to spend lots of money and got nothing out of it (besides a pay check from Nick). Remember how confused everyone was about this big trip he was taking and then never even streamed? (Except for Aaron’s arraignment apparently.)

I wonder how much Nick paid him?

Now Nick has to keep two BPD idiots, with nothing to lose, with massive leverage on him happy. Guess he will have to use his natural charm, or grandad’s trust fund, to prevent them from turning on him. Maybe Nick’s master plan is to send April to Ralph and kill two birds with one stone.

It’s truly shocking how utterly retarded Nick has proved himself to be. He really deserves both Ralph and April in his life for months to come.

 

[30+GameOvers]

What are the odds of yet another international gunt punt? Gunt might be harder to find in Mexico than he was in Lisbon, but I'm sure there are a-logs living in Mexico. While we don't know exactly where the tin hovel is, we do know in which city he lives in, and he still has to go outside to buy more Modelos and tortas.
Any confrontation with him in public is bound to end in another beating, but at the same time, the pig can't stay in it's own filth forever, as much as he would want to. It creates a difficult situation for the swine marked for arrest!
Alternatively, an even easier way for a-logs to deal with the situation is to simply contact the local police and let them know about the nationwide warrant for arrest. I doubt they care about this gringo, not like he contributes to the local area or anything.

 

[AltisticRight]

I've moved this to its own thread very late because it does not belong in the Rekieta thread.

A nationwide arrest warrant for a misdemeanor is basically unheard of. He really pissed off Minnesota. Being a Fugitive from Justice in the US will make his life abroad more difficult as he is going to lose access to American services over time.

It's pretty odd, maybe they want to make an example out of him to warn future streamers?
A small county like Kandiyohi can be easily overwhelmed when such an event happens. The courtroom operators can't even use Zoom properly.

 

[Spergichu]

Could the national warrant just be because he's residing in a foreign country and could potentially re-enter the US through a dozen different states by land or air?

 

[30+GameOvers]

I’m convinced Nick paid for Ralph’s trip to MN and to be his “secret weapon” in the war against Aaron.

That's the most retarded outcome for Nick, so therefore the most likely

 

[Look--an Alien!]

I’m convinced Nick paid for Ralph’s trip to MN and to be his “secret weapon” in the war against Aaron.

Ralph making a trip to MN was very sus to begin with, he got nothing out of it besides a pay check from Nick. I wonder how much Nick paid him?

I assumed it was the $20,000 Ralph was bragging about at the time.

 

[BrokeBackPhil]

He can enter the US, just not though legal methods. I am looking forward to a long and entertaining fugitive arc. I hope he hires some coyotes to smuggle his fat gringo ass across the boarder so he can go hang out with Juju or try to visit Xander.

True Ralphamale fans would know that he has done it a few times in Tijuana to see his beloved only child, Xander.

 

[HackerX]

If Vickers didn't act like a complete fucking dipshit and just followed Rule #1, he'd not only have this win but he'd also not be bankrupt right now:

View attachment 6632776

Vickers had bankruptcy issues prior to Ralph. It's inevitable.

Why didn't he just get a new book???

There's a lot of "why didn't Ralph just do X?" questions. The wigga is retarded.

Could the national warrant just be because he's residing in a foreign country and could potentially re-enter the US through a dozen different states by land or air?

I wonder how much of Harry's input shaped the warrant. "He's hiding in Mexico and has a tendency to harass people nationally" is as good as reason as any. I still love the "hiding in Mexico" quip in the warrant.

 

[JAKL II]

If he's smart (which he's not), he'd avoid visiting anyone he knows in the US. The amount of people that would sell his fat ass up the river is staggering.

His dumbass would post pictures of where hes at and people would find him that way. If he steps foot in America illegally I fully expect the alogs to have him in custody within 24 hours.

Ralph's too stupid not to tempt weaponized autism

 

[kevinortonjr]

talk about bully youtuber name michael and hatman and emma666 and elaine and luna ghost the destroyer and parody guy and anns crap chat the youtuber i name is pick at handicap people all the time call them retard and special freaks people and worse word then that and they tell them they took over the cjng of mexico that they was the new owner of them and they make the people eat shit and and dog food and they said the people there are week ass people now they are in charge they make them bow down to them they talk like that all the time on youtube they say no one can stop them it look like it call youtube they do nothing they need a good talking to stop them that all i have good night

 

[Fastest Hand In The East]

The man can't stop being felted, I love it.

 

[Bland Crumbs]

I am not a lawyer but the first thing I thought of as I started reading the warrant was that the most likely course of action Ethan takes is to ignore this warrant.

Now I would expect that such avoidance would result in additional charges and a harsher penalty when he is eventually taken into custody.

Can any lawologists comment on potential consequences of ol' pig slits evading this warrant by hiding in Mexico?

 

[Sneedmiser]

Is there a particular reason this was made a national warrant?

Tim Walz wanted to meet a fellow male tampon enjoyer.

 

[Harambe]

a fuckin warrant can't keep a real man from his chil his only son his only begotten son, warrants are suggestions compared to natural law which entitles a man to a supervised visit once a month

 

[PhoBingas]

Ralph making a trip to MN was very sus to begin with, he had to spend lots of money and got nothing out of it (besides a pay check from Nick). Remember how confused everyone was about this big trip he was taking and then never even streamed? (Except for Aaron’s arraignment apparently.)

Exactly. If it's not drugs, whores, his data plan or booze Ralph doesn't spend money on it.

 

[beautiful person]

If he's smart (which he's not), he'd avoid visiting anyone he knows in the US. The amount of people that would sell his fat ass up the river is staggering.

And most of those people are actively hoping for the opportunity to do so.

It's pretty odd, maybe they want to make an example out of him to warn future streamers?
A small county like Kandiyohi can be easily overwhelmed when such an event happens. The courtroom operators can't even use Zoom properly.

It's not Kandiyohi County, it's Stearns. Stearns County is still fairly small in the grand scheme of things, at about 158K people, but still much bigger than Kandiyohi's ~44K people.