🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[Axiom.]

Anyone here knows what the documentary is all about?

T/A

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Was it about how to keep your bishes in line by threatening to choke them while your 1 year old daughter is crying?

 

[FiveStarAce]

Anyone here knows what the documentary is all about?

T/A

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It's gonna be some retarded groyper shit.

 

[Um...]

Well since he agreed to be interviewed one can logically assume it's about one of his many enemies.

I love the contrast between his imaginary Twitter world where he’s a Very Important, Sought-After and Influential Celebrity and the real world where the poor mutt can’t even get over 300 viewers.

 

[AncientPhosphur]

I love the contrast between his imaginary Twitter world where he’s a Very Important, Sought-After and Influential Celebrity and the real world where the poor mutt can’t even get over 300 viewers.
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It may have been a stunt but fucking amazing how Trump has done more physical low wage labor than Ralph ever has.

 

[Um...]

It may have been a stunt but fucking amazing how Trump has done more physical low wage labor than Ralph ever has.

Ralph does low wage labor 8 hours/day on his sad little struggle streams, just not physical. He couldn’t do anything physical if his life depended on it.

 

[Mr. Manchester]

I love the contrast between his imaginary Twitter world where he’s a Very Important, Sought-After and Influential Celebrity and the real world where the poor mutt can’t even get over 300 viewers.
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At this point he should just shit out click bate videos like Quarterpounder. The thumbnails are the only work Ralph seems to do so he might as well spam the fuck out of them.

 

[HackerX]

It may have been a stunt but fucking amazing how Trump has done more physical low wage labor than Ralph ever has.

Unironically, Trump's physical activity in a single round of golf is exponentially higher than Ralph's last 5 years (at least) combined.

The oniy things that come to mind where Ralph has streamed himself exceededing his physical baseline of a slow walk are:
- Getting beat up by Dan The Destroyer in Portugal.
- Getting beat up by Riley in "The Battle of the Gunts"
- His bowling event (He was so proud of that trophy that he brought that with him to Mexico over Sandra's ashes LOL)
- "Arrest HEEM Arrest HEEM" at the same bowling event (bitchmade).

I can't think of anything else where Ralph exerted physical effort. I'd pay good money to get a certificate measurement of his resting heart rate. My guess is 90+.

 

[AnOminous]

I can't think of anything else where Ralph exerted physical effort. I'd pay good money to get a certificate measurement of his resting heart rate. My guess is 90+.

It probably takes significant physical effort just to raise his gunt enough to stand up.

 

[Obscura539]

Unironically, Trump's physical activity in a single round of golf is exponentially higher than Ralph's last 5 years (at least) combined.

The oniy things that come to mind where Ralph has streamed himself exceededing his physical baseline of a slow walk are:
- Getting beat up by Dan The Destroyer in Portugal.
- Getting beat up by Riley in "The Battle of the Gunts"
- His bowling event (He was so proud of that trophy that he brought that with him to Mexico over Sandra's ashes LOL)
- "Arrest HEEM Arrest HEEM" at the same bowling event (bitchmade).

I can't think of anything else where Ralph exerted physical effort. I'd pay good money to get a certificate measurement of his resting heart rate. My guess is 90+.

Ralph once promised to spite walk two miles.

Ralph has shoveled poop out of a butthole and into his mouth.

Ralph pays prostitutes to hump him as his body sloshes like the open sea.

I’m willing to bet there’s probably two or more beatings we don’t even know about.

I would say he’s as active as he’s ever been.

 

[Pitbull Victim]

This was definitely the most exercise Ralph ever got, especially considering he was already winded from accosting sex-pest and closeted-homosexual Elijah Schaffer on the other side of the parking lot.

 

[HackerX]

This was definitely the most exercise Ralph ever got, especially considering he was already winded from accosting sex-pest and closeted-homosexual Elijah Schaffer on the other side of the parking lot.

Ooh you're right. I forgot about that classic. I wonder what happened to the cowboy hat.

 

[JhonVent]

I wonder what happened to the cowboy hat

If I remember right, I think Hairy sold it at an eBay auction along with a bunch of Ralph other crap that he left his home in Rochester New York.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

If I remember right, I think Hairy sold it at an eBay auction along with a bunch of Ralph other crap that he left his home in Rochester New York.

Talk about getting cursed items on ebay

 

[AltisticRight]

I love the contrast between his imaginary Twitter world where he’s a Very Important, Sought-After and Influential Celebrity and the real world where the poor mutt can’t even get over 300 viewers.
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At least that's a few more than Johnny.
And a few less than DSP.

WASHED.

 

[UCantCCPMe]

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At least that's a few more than Johnny.
And a few less than DSP.

WASHED.

Well, DSP does suck less than Ralph at video games. Ralph is just legitimately bad. He got skunked at MK10 by Jim, couldn't beat the first level of Mario Bros., tried to attack a Barbarian with his settler in Civ 6. Ralph's gaming skills makes Phil's look god tier

 

[AltisticRight]

Well, DSP does suck less than Ralph at video games. Ralph is just legitimately bad. He got skunked at MK10 by Jim, couldn't beat the first level of Mario Bros., tried to attack a Barbarian with his settler in Civ 6. Ralph's gaming skills makes Phil's look god tier

He couldn't even get past the Elden Ring tutorial.
And that's somehow after he actually made the achievement of "launch the game" because he installed 5 different pirated copies.

 

[UCantCCPMe]

He couldn't even get past the Elden Ring tutorial.
And that's somehow after he actually made the achievement of "launch the game" because he installed 5 different pirated copies.

It's strange to me, you'd think being a bullied little fat kid with no friends in the 90s, that he would have been a prolific gamer, but based on his lack of any intuitive skill, maybe he spent all his afternoons knocking holes in the wall. Could also be the drugs, the booze, his inbred Arkansas genes or a litany of other reasons as to why he sucks at every game he plays.

 

[deeman]

Well, DSP does suck less than Ralph at video games. Ralph is just legitimately bad. He got skunked at MK10 by Jim, couldn't beat the first level of Mario Bros., tried to attack a Barbarian with his settler in Civ 6. Ralph's gaming skills makes Phil's look god tier

O god i forgot about the Mario debacle, it's up there with Mike Matei being so drunk he can't finish the first world of SMB... And that Civ game will never NOT be funny. Let's hope he tries to become this gayme streamer.

Axchtually, it's surprising that Ethan havent gotten himself that Harry Potter game just to spite Neigh.

 

[Cyberpunk Meta]

It's strange to me, you'd think being a bullied little fat kid with no friends in the 90s, that he would have been a prolific gamer, but based on his lack of any intuitive skill, maybe he spent all his afternoons knocking holes in the wall. Could also be the drugs, the booze, his inbred Arkansas genes or a litany of other reasons as to why he sucks at every game he plays.

Hilariously Piggertits began his grift off GamerGate, an event about video games is also quite funny when you think about it. He’s an atrocious gamer. The best he could do is sportsball simulations and even at those piggyboy sucks.

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

Hilariously Piggertits began his grift off GamerGate, an event about video games is also quite funny when you think about it.

Pretty sure this is why he wanted to have Vito on to talk comics. While it's in it's dying days Ralph will try and hitch his gunt on the comics gate grift wagon.