Faux Fine Dining Hate Thread - $20 for a taco

[DSP for president 2032]

-I hate when i order a pate/toast starter and you get a giant portion of pate and 2 tiny slices of toast.

This seems like a great opportunity to troll by asking for more toast. Make it their problem!

 

[Universal Balance]

Nah you know what fucks me right off, when they get an affordable cut and they remarket that shit and then exponentially increase the price.

It’s a fucking shank not a thor’s hammer you pretentious money grubbing fucks.

 

[Poppavalyim Andropoff]

Australia is still suffering from the overpriced burger thing.

Sit down restaurant, kitsch/kooky decor, they/them waitstaff and Pajeet cooks,
$35 burgers that taste like Hungry Jacks (so Whataburger for you Seppos), chips are extra, and the only drinks they sell are these:
View attachment 7616980

all the good wog takeaways that have been making "smash burgers" for decades have retired & sold to usually asians who usually completely fuck up a great takeaway or change it to a Chinese takeaway. hence all those stupid things like grill'd and the "pop up" things and food trucks opened.
it's enough to make you go vegan

 

[Iron Jaguar]

I don't go to fine dining restaurants, for the simple reason that they never serve anything I would actually enjoy.
On the occasions I eat out, it will almost invariably be at one of a number of excellent Indian/Pakistani restaurants I know. They are not cheap but I would describe them as "inexpensive" e.g. a group of 6 will spend maybe $40 each for the entire meal and a drink.
The only relatively high end restaurant I go to is Chin Chin, an Asian Fusion place in the city, where I will pay $120 - $150 for lunch for two.

Sydney niggers who like a good smash burger: try Eat at RoBs, at Rozelle.

 

[8reallybigbirds]

If you're paying 20$ for a taco that's not fine dining, that's just a normal fucking resturaunt now. Price of food is ruined for fucking ever.
Just cook at home if you don't want to pay for the service though.

 

[DeutschfagAufAbwegen]

Mate, you got to avoid tourist traps, not seek them out

 

[Overwritten Tapes]

Theres a few places in the hipster part of town that charge $20 for a burger, not counting drinks or anything, and the place looks like it was decorated off Temu.

 

[ZipDisk]

Stop saying asian when you mean pajeet. Chinks lack the stink gene.
Pajeets smell bad because they spawn from garbage.

And of course, one of their dastardly plans is to deprive us of delicious hamburgers.
Fucking reddit niggers talking about how "chicken burgers are fine"

Besides, we're talking about faux fancy, not obvious flytraps.

I will admit I always thought the term "hole in the wall" for honest food restaurants was overly insulting.

Back to fake fine dining bullshit. TIME LIMITS. When I eat, I want to eat, not be told that my time is expiring and I need to pay and move on. I don't want to go to disneyland, and I don't want a waiter with an egg timer.

 

[PhoBingas]

If corporate booked a big restaurant and it felt like a front for the cartel with cheap fake decor and cheap yogurt served in plastic cups you'd be livid.

Congrats, you've cracked the code of the service industry!

 

[Yak-130 Mitten]

Australia is still suffering from the overpriced burger thing.

Sit down restaurant, kitsch/kooky decor, they/them waitstaff and Pajeet cooks,
$35 burgers that taste like Hungry Jacks (so Whataburger for you Seppos), chips are extra, and the only drinks they sell are these:
View attachment 7616980

Dont you fucking dare slander Jarritos, I wish I could get those at reasonable price in Europe. 4 euros a bottle is too much.

 

[2mm and 99 others]

All of these are the types of restaurants you'll find in super-progressive leftist city centers. I actually have been thinking for a while about how much of this gig is done by corporations masquerading as local businesses since many of them build the same cookie cutter buildings and standardize all of their stuff to the same extent that quick service restaurant franchises do (similar to how ghost kitchens are ran by).

First you have to pay to park on the side of the road and hope your car doesn't get its windows smashed like it does every other time you visit downtown. You enter the building, it either looks like a Hyatt Hotel or it looks like an eldritch monstrosity of exposed brick walls and hollowed out ceilings
View attachment 7616539
The negro xhe/xir with a pronoun pin hands you a Temuther-bound menu full of ridiculously overpriced Socal Mex dishes
View attachment 7616535
You glance through the menu and get the one somewhat normal looking item, a taco plate that costs $32. You wait 30 minutes and finally you get the damn thing served on a rack of bent steel, the tortilla is literally uncooked and it tastes more like a chicken salad than it does a taco.
View attachment 7616486
Once you get up and leave you then get the barrage of tips and whatnot.

Anyway it's a genuinely retarded concept to bait hippie scum, but like any good businessman would, I respect the grift.

There will also be these barstools:


Above your head will hang this (If not just the faux-industrial lamp):


Your frites will be wrapped in a lorem-ipsum newspaper:


And the burger, you ask? Well, it might not lack size-wise, but it's gonna be the most unseasoned, tasteless and the blandest you ever had. It goes the same worldwide, really.

 

[Asian tech support]

Dont you fucking dare slander Jarritos, I wish I could get those at reasonable price in Europe. 4 euros a bottle is too much.

I'm not a soda drinker but those things are the tits. I like the lime ones. The walmart near me has the big ones.

 

[Lapsus of the bepsus]

And the burger, you ask? Well, it might not lack size-wise, but it's gonna be the most unseasoned, tasteless and the blandest you ever had. It goes the same worldwide, really.

might not lack size-wise in height maybe but not the width to match. these fucking places seem to revel in making their burgers like those wobbly boulders on top of tall rocks in desert canyons. you spend 3 minutes after being served trying to compress that shit to a reasonable size so you can take a fucking bite only for it to violently spring launch the 1 tomato slice, both pickle slices and a gallon of greasy mayo sauce contained within right in your face when you attempt to eat it

 

[General Emílio Médici]

It feels like a cargo cult in a way. A bunch of unskilled people copying the superficial aspects of a thing trying to emulate it without understanding what made it work.

"Oh on this 500 dollar a plate 3 Michelin star restaurant they serve the fish cut like this, and put the sides on that edge! I am gonna do that!" And they put some cheap grilled cod on the place with a shitty vinaigrette on the side to match the appearance without understanding the 3 Michelin Star place poached the fish in aromatic butter and the salad is actually matched to pair with the aromatics.

This in my opinion explains a lot of this stuff.

Biggest restaurant red flag is the desert menu, a majority of dessert menus are just items bought straight from catering companies and you can usually tell.

Unless the place has a real business of selling deserts and sweets also going on, this is true. Very few restaurants are gonna bother making over a dozen deserts in addition to their whole menus.

 

[Apustajan apustaja]

Dont you fucking dare slander Jarritos, I wish I could get those at reasonable price in Europe. 4 euros a bottle is too much.

My local Lidl sometimes have them for like 2,5€, and food here is notoriously expensive for Europe.

Having worked in a lot of restaurants, most people dont know how much a lot of the finer stuff also comes out of a can. That Foie gras mousse is never made in house. Same thing with shellfishproducts like skagen. Half of a fine dining experience is out of a can.

 

[wtfNeedSignUp]

I wonder if Applebee's counts as those, since it sounds like it has a resurgence with zoomers. Ditto I've heard it's basically the current state of British pubs.

Thread tax: Food in Israel is already costly as fuck. I've basically given up on ever eating a steak at restaurant, and even normal food costs so much going to dates is basically two days worth of food cost down the drain. Though to be fair even the hipster places have an alright food quality.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

One of the worst casualties of this isn't special corporate outings or dates, it's knowing where to eat.

"Oh that restaurant. Nothing under $50 and you'll get hair in your food. Everyone loves it because they have a wine list but it's really a shithole. Bathrooms are dirty and your waiter is Mexican."


Absolute tragedy. I have no idea where to eat or even to save up to visit. I just go to my usual $10 spots even on extra super special occasions because I cannot find a better place. Even the places I'm recommended by better off friends are greasy burger joints.

I'm not knocking those, but what do I do if I have a really really special occasion? I cannot find anywhere "expensive" where the food matches the airs they put on, it's all a cheap mirage.

If I step back and think "if I were president where would I eat for my inauguration?" I cannot tell you. It's like Africans and maintenance, I don't even have the concept in my mind of what actual "fine dining" is because I've only ever seen disappointing or insulting cargo cult imitations.

 

[mindlessobserver]

I've always been a fan of English Public House chic. Its just so cozy.


Elegant, down to earth, homey. You feel like its a place you can spend hours in hanging out, shooting the shit with the lads. Down some pints. Maybe have a bit of roast beef.

Then we got Industrial Neu-Hipster


Industrial. No terroir. Looks the exact opposite of comfy. You feel like you are walking onto a factory floor, where the goal is to move you down the conveyor belt as fast as humanly possible, take your money and turf you out. Possibly prepackaged in a box. You won't talk to anyone here because everyone who goes here is an asshole. You will drink one insanely overpriced glass of wine or cocktail. You won't eat anything because its all gay and retarded.

 

[The Connected Nose]

Not quite fine dining, but Five Guys Burgers and Fries pioneered the concept of overcharging for what is barely better than typical fast food slop. I remember going there once (and only once) with a relative and even though we didn't get anything big, between the two of us it was nearly 40 dollars for rather average food. Never again.

Negrate me all you want, but I kinda like going to Five Guys every now and then. They don't skimp on the toppings, said toppings are always fresh, and they seem to be one of the few places that knows how to properly cook bacon for a burger.

There was a story from 2015 about a restaurant at the Rosa Khutor ski resort that had a 12-times upsell on a cut-up plombir ice cream.
View attachment 7616981

You don't hate faux fine dining enough.

B-b-but it's dEcOnStRuCtEd!

I've always been a fan of English Public House chic. Its just so cozy.


Elegant, down to earth, homey. You feel like its a place you can spend hours in hanging out, shooting the shit with the lads. Down some pints. Maybe have a bit of roast beef.

Not a public house style but still cozy, IMO; Bombay Club in NOLA. Granted I haven't been there in like 20 years, but it was a nice cozy, quiet place. Swanky, but cozy. Rather expensive drinks, since that's what they're known for, but the food was VERY reasonable. And it didn't matter if you were in formal-wear or just a t-shirt and jeans. Neither one would feel out of place.

 

[BootlegPopeye]

Negrate me all you want, but I kinda like going to Five Guys every now and then. They don't skimp on the toppings, said toppings are always fresh, and they seem to be one of the few places that knows how to properly cook bacon for a burger.

I already got neg rated for that myself, but it isn't that Five Guys is gross; it's that it is probably double if not triple would it should be priced. I don't remember being disgusted by them, but I didn't really think it was anything special and certainly not worth 40 dollars for 2 people at what is a glorified high end McDonalds.

Even worse though, is that Five Guys business model of 'somewhat slightly more upscale fast food' is starting to be copied by other upstarts who then also charge insane prices for what is, again, ultimately just fast food.