🐟 Fishtank Fishtank.Live General - Jet Neptune's Pisces Aquarium Internet Reality Show w/ Host Bam Margera

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With a (questionable) W from James Drake, how would you rate season 5 of Fishtank?

  • 1 Star — Absolute disaster. Unwatchable, boring, production fucked it up bad, the fish were lame

    Votes: 56 7.3%

  • 2 Stars — Pretty bad. Some funny moments, dragged, too many vibe repair days. Barely worth checking.

    Votes: 87 11.4%

  • 3 Stars — Average. Solid entertainment in spots, some good chaos and crashouts, but nothing special

    Votes: 169 22.1%

  • 4 Stars — Really good. Lots of hilarious moments, strong fish personalities, solid content and vibes

    Votes: 405 53.0%

  • 5 Stars — Peak Fishtank / Masterpiece. Non-stop insanity, legendary fish and production, pure chaos

    Votes: 47 6.2%
  • Total voters
    764
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The fish have been gathered for the BLOOD GAMES against the vampires. Everyone is assemble. Dunyay and chris will be on commentary for the anime tournament. Jet is dressed like a bane henchman from the batman movies.

Jet went on an entire speech about the event the fish didn't even hear because they were discussing strategy at basecamp. JET IT UP! Extremely gorian vibes as the fish stumble towards the arena with paladin jon supposedly on oxycodone for his busted leg. He strained it running through the woods at night.

Goldstraven has suppressed xavier's magic and cast frenzy on jon for 30 minutes. He is also 40 feet tall now.
 
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Lt. H. DuBois said:
This has amounted to him just saying fuck fuck fucking fuck every few moments
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Sigh. I don’t know why I expected Jon to even try to role play. Even the 25 hit boss was a disappointment. Only good thing was him saying Jon was the gay one.
 
After the wave fights, the Fish were placed in 1v1 ladders. First three rounds were melee only, everyone was given a sword and shield.

Round 1: Tayleigh vs Greg. Greg wins 3-to-2. Xavier shamed Tay for losing, telling her that he didn't even want to look at her after a loss.

Round 2: Tai vs Vance. Tai whines about the shield, is told to suck it up. Tai wins 3-to-1.

Round 3: Jimmy vs Jon. Duke says Jimmy will win, because he will "complain his way into a win." Jon wins 3-to-0. All three were contested and decided by the audience declaring Jon won each fight.

Next match was magic.

Round 4: Letty vs Xavier. Letty casts SCROLL OF HUMILIATE XAVIER. Xavier casts SCROLL OF REVERSE TIME to counter it. Xavier is simultaneously hit with Fire and Freeze by Letty. Xavier casts SCROLL OF INSTANT FORFEIT. He argues with the Duke over whether "INSTANT FORFEIT' means he forfeits, or Letty is forced to forfeit. As he is reading the scroll, Letty casts SCROLL OF OBEDIENCE. Xavier argues that he already cast INSTANT FORFEIT, so the SCROLL OF OBEDIENCE couldn't be cast. Jet and The Duke rules that Letty lost "fair and square". Xavier wins 1-0 because apparently this fight was best of 1.

Back to melee for the semi-finals!

Round 5: Tai vs Jon. Sword vs. board. Tai wins 3-0. Each time Tai just jumped and hit Jon on the neck. Jon never changed his stance and ate shit every time. Duke and Jet rules that a neck shot is more vital than a leg shot when Jon complains.

Round 6: Greg vs Xavier. Before the fight, Greg demanded that Xavier not use any kind of tricks to win the fight. Xavier refused. The Duke reminded Greg that Xavier is an ancient being of trickery and cannot be held to that. Greg reached out and forced Xavier to shake his hand, then put him in a headlock and threw him to the ground! Xavier dual wielded, Greg went sword and board. Greg wins 3-2. Xavier attempts to cast the SCROLL OF WINNING. Greg tries to pull it from his hands, but rips it, which means it casts! Greg attempts to use the AMULET OF SANTA MARIA instead, because God overrules vampire magic! Xavier complains that he paid "a large amount of money to not be ridiculed" on the show. Xavier and Greg agree that they will now consider this a "draw". Jet wonders how a draw works on a tournament board. Xavier decides to cast a SCROLL OF XAVIER WINS. This overrules the DRAW that was agreed on. Xavier wins.

FINAL FIGHT!

Round 7: Tai vs Xavier. Xavier agrees that he will not use magic during this fight, but requires that Tai use guns! This will settle the previous argument over whether guns or swords are more powerful. Xavier has two swords, Tai uses a revolver and shield. Apparently this fight was just best of one, which Tai very easily wins 1-0. Xavier simply charges forward, and Tai draws and shoots him.

Ultimately, Tai is the winner and receives the Crystal Cluster! Tai, being a complete retard, announces during his winning speech that by winning the Crystal Cluster, they are now "one step closer to killing The Duke." Of course, the Duke is in attendance and hears this entire speech revealing the fish are trying to kill him.

Edit:

OH SHIT. Xavier demands that he is given a 1v1 duel with Jon, who has constantly shit talked him. He asks King Fattius for permission to duel Jon. King Fattius agrees!

Round ???: JON VS XAVIER. Both dual wield. Jon is noticeably breathing heavily. JON WINS 3 TO 0. HOLY SHIT!!!!! Xavier and Jon do end up shaking hands after though. Tai compliments Jon for "kicking his ass".
 
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Surprise round. Jon vs Xavier. They’re going to find out who’s the stronger one, he says they’re both wounded. Jimmy wants Jon to take a minute or two. Xavier wants Jon to prove he has what it takes to be a vampire? Fatty says he’s stalling

Round 1:
First strike Jon

Round 2:
Jon

Round 3:
Jon? Xavier fallen and Jon wins.

Xavier flees out of shame
 
Jon was HUFFING and PUFFING with what seemed like tard rage as Xavier challenged him and prepared to fight. I want to say he got hit a few times and just powered through from anger but I haven't reviewed the footage not that it'd matter.
 
Nobody has mentioned this yet but the greedy wiggers decided to allow to two separate TTS feeds during the Blood Games. Between Fatty being inaudible as the commentator over the loud speakers, the TTS, and the cackles from the audience- everything was inaudible for the majority of it. At one point when The Duke was speaking between the contestants and then trying to explain the rules, he would switch between waiting for the TTS to finish and trying to talk over the TTS. This leads me to think that they won't do a final cut of season 2.5 because the audio will be completely ruined.

Great job Jet!
 
Surprised they let Xavier lose so early. Maybe it's like in a videogame where you fight a boss throughout the game, each encounter harder than the last?

Edit: to clarify I know he's not done for good. I'm just in awe the prince of Raven's was bested so early in combat. Especially with such mastery of the blade.
 
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North Oakland Avenue said:
Nobody has mentioned this yet but the greedy wiggers decided to allow to two separate TTS feeds during the Blood Games. Between Fatty being inaudible as the commentator over the loud speakers, the TTS, and the cackles from the audience- everything was inaudible for the majority of it. At one point when The Duke was speaking between the contestants and then trying to explain the rules, he would switch between waiting for the TTS to finish and trying to talk over the TTS. This leads me to think that they won't do a final cut of season 2.5 because the audio will be completely ruined.

Great job Jet!
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Might be a clever way to drive some traffic if they don't offer some sort of final cut, just force folks to watch it live. Not sure if they are clever enough to do that though.

Lowercase I internet said:
Surprised they let Xavier lose so early. Maybe it's like in a videogame where you fight a boss throughout the game, each encounter harder than the last?
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I don't think Xavier is gone for good.
 
Lowercase I internet said:
Surprised they let Xavier lose so early. Maybe it's like in a videogame where you fight a boss throughout the game, each encounter harder than the last?
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No way Xavier is done. He owns one of the five artifacts the Fish need to defeat The Duke. He outright warned them yesterday that he is needed to actually finish their ultimate quest of killing The Duke.
 
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