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With a (questionable) W from James Drake, how would you rate season 5 of Fishtank?

  • 1 Star — Absolute disaster. Unwatchable, boring, production fucked it up bad, the fish were lame

    Votes: 56 7.3%
  • 2 Stars — Pretty bad. Some funny moments, dragged, too many vibe repair days. Barely worth checking.

    Votes: 87 11.4%
  • 3 Stars — Average. Solid entertainment in spots, some good chaos and crashouts, but nothing special

    Votes: 169 22.1%
  • 4 Stars — Really good. Lots of hilarious moments, strong fish personalities, solid content and vibes

    Votes: 405 53.0%
  • 5 Stars — Peak Fishtank / Masterpiece. Non-stop insanity, legendary fish and production, pure chaos

    Votes: 47 6.2%

  • Total voters
    764
They were teasing it from week one with the "broadcast hijacks", it was clearly a slow burn that was meant to be incorporated into the characters they were building the Fish up to be.
I thought that wasnt until Week 2 or 3 either, but I could be forgetting. Either way, Cole won because he didnt have to spend a month and a half listening to Brian, Tay, and Jimmy. He's a giant tittybaby (still like him though) for constantly crashing out and wiping his socials 3-4 times afterwards though.
 
To be fair they didnt abandon it, it just got raided
The market wasn't abandoned, it was raided. We want it restocked.
I know... I know...
That would also be a funny as fuck reason to not give James Drake the money if he wins. He was the one who raided the market, take it out of his winnings along with the doors.
James Drake raided it after Binx, Vimp, Bashir, and Landon took all the room temp goods.
 
There's a chance for them to make this bit actually funny by Drake proposing the bootleg goo he's making is the superior product but I doubt any of these retards will realise that a Goo-based gang war is a good narrative.
Drakes counterfeit goo this morning was terrible and would never pass mint's inspection. That shit had no viscosity to it, dry as fuck goo.
 
To be fair they didnt abandon it, it just got raided
After the "economy wipe" on week 2, more people started openly stealing from the market. They stopped giving fines except for JD, and were pooling for essentials when they did buy stuff. When bingo/bingo started introducing freeloaders to the market with "thats the shop, we steal from there all the time" it was pretty much over
 
They should also have the fish design fishtank T-shirts for the store, then sell the designs to us online, which would require a 3rd party print and ship dropshipper. Someone could also rip kino stills and memes from the season and put designs up almost instantly for sale.
All wrapped up with a speech from Mr Cominos on how important drop shipping is as a life skill.
 
After the "economy wipe" on week 2, more people started openly stealing from the market. They stopped giving fines except for JD, and were pooling for essentials when they did buy stuff. When bingo/bingo started introducing freeloaders to the market with "thats the shop, we steal from there all the time" it was pretty much over
Just like an actual jeet run corner store. Amazing environmental storytelling, Mr. Neptune
 
Just like an actual jeet run corner store. Amazing environmental storytelling, Mr. Neptune
They should have continued the bit where you get a limb cut off for the day if you get caught stealing.
James Drake raided it after Binx, Vimp, Bashir, and Landon took all the room temp goods.
True, however he is the one who took the fridges, the microwave and the hotdog cooker. The wiggers can graciously let him have all that for 50k.
 
So it this the content for the next few days? Watching Goo room shenanigans while Drake and Co. lounge around downstairs until impotently coming up in the middle of the night to throw something out the window?
 
The Goo Room Empire grows.
Screenshot_20260409_135440_Chrome.jpg
Crazy how happy they all seem churning up some goo without the former goo woman noise polluting.
 
You can't say that for sure. Emma was also a very valid target.
Then it's also fair to say we can't say for sure what would have happened if the Wiggers hadn't changed the rules of the plant competition and allowed Emma to include the log from the jungle room after telling the boys it wouldn't count.
 
Then it's also fair to say we can't say for sure what would have happened if the Wiggers hadn't changed the rules of the plant competition and allowed Emma to include the log from the jungle room after telling the boys it wouldn't count.
Okay? I'm just saying Drake seethers should quit trying to revise history to say "Oh but Bashir would totally be top dog in the house right now if it wasn't for X" Anything could be different. Bashir could have just talked to people differently and maybe have James out of the house by now.
 
The market could've been a whole layer to drive and game-ify everything: On goo duty? You have to go buy PPE and materials in the market, here's your shopping list. Don't have enough money? Apart from the competitions for big fishbucks, there's a job sheet of things you can do for guaranteed fishbucks at any time. Actual productive jobs like janitor, or degrading things, or things that will piss off other fish like stealing. Want liquor/pizza? It's brought in the house by production into the market, but the fish have to pay fishbucks to get it. Freeloaders don't pay for shit, which incentivizes the fish to either villify freeloaders for actually, you know, freeloading their shit. Or befriend them and try to have them smuggle market goods for them.

It'd be extra work to enforce and drive those kinds of rules, which is probably why they gave it up. But it could drive natural drama and storylines rather than having Ben come up and give direction.
 
I'm not even a fan of Drake, I'd be fine if they kicked both of them and brought Landon back to lose to the Twins.

Funniest everyone right now though is Bashir works his ass off making good that ends up as extra money for Drake.
 
After all of this, Bashir is still saying to not be mean to Vimp. Don't retraumatize her. Don't dogpile her.

He really liked her and she did him like that (:_(. He still wants the best for her.
 
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