Fun sayings or expressions that you know of

[ConanTheVintarian]

- Strike while the iron is hot.

I think that old people have quite a stock of fun sayings. I always love remembering how old gentlemen getitng angry spit out so many golden sayings like they're ancient wizards casting spells.
Clint Eastwood is one such person, despite it being shown in his movies mostly.

- You couldn't take care of a wet dream.

- Padre pucho - father cigar - modern South American (or just spaniard) catholic priests (who usually delve in substances too much!)

 

[DefinitelyNotMe]

Безумцы землю ногами крутят (The world spins under the feet of madmen) , was always one of my favorites.
Смех без причины – признак дурачины (laugh without a reason is a sign of a fool), pretty self explanatory.
Семь пятниц в неделе (7 fridays a week), about a man who changes his mind constantly.
Дураку полработы не показывают (never teach a fool by shoving only half of the work) works either in literal or "don't even try you'll waste your time" sense.

 

[the rat]

"shut it down"

 

[Jason Wynn]

Wish in one hand, shit in the other. See which one fills up first

 

[Zoosadist sadist]

I learned some from my mother who learned them from my grandfather:

* You sing well but it's bad to listen to you.
* To my mom: "Your husband will have a crazy wife".
* "There was this guy who hugged a donkey and strangled him"
* "Go mad early, then your whole life is joy and happiness", I heard this one from other people as well and might be from a song but I'm not sure at the moment.
* "It's crouded at the bottom", in the sense that if you're good and aiming high you don't need to worry about other people who are trying to do simplest / low effort stuff, although it also holds truth that most popular things are stupid.

 

[TheRetardKing]

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

"just run em over with your car"

 

[Chuck 'n Geck]

Imma throw another good one in Russian: "горбатого могила исправит"; wordier translation: "only a grave can heal the hunchback".

Perfect for describing terminal lolcows or faggot cultists, for they will probably never become adequate members of society, not by their own will.

 

[NaggotFigger]

Địt con mẹ mày đụ má con lồn cặc cứt bò địt mẹ mày địt cha cặc lồn chết đời lồn má mày.

That’s what I’m thinking.

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Busy as a bee - this means you are very busy.
Busy as a beaver - this means you are very busy.

 

[Lemmingwiser]

I like the australian expression "We're not here to fuck spiders". Like mate, speak for yourself.

I dislike the english expression "The exception that proves the rule". People always use it to say "Okay you've just given an argument against my position, but I'm going to ignore it anyway by just calling it an exception". But the origin of that expression is if you have a sign that says "Walking on grass permitted on sunday". Here the exception of it being allowed on sunday, proves there is a rule you can't walk on the grass in other times.

 

[VargReallyDidNothingWrong]

"shaking like a dog shitting peach pits" is one that paints a really vivid picture in my head.

 

[oldTireWater]

Wish in one hand, shit in the other. See which one fills up first

A variation is "Wish in one hand, shit in the other. Clap them together and see what you get."

 

[We Are The Witches]

- "Me cago en Diógenes!"

Literally translated as "I shit on Diogenes", it's a spanish variation of a common expression "me cago en dios" ("I shit on god"), when you are angry about something. However for this one, the funny remark is that instead of uttering blasphemy, you're being more "polite" and changing "dios" for "Diógenes", because at first it appeared you were going to say the former.

- "Los cojones de Mahoma!"

Literally translated as "Muhammad's balls (testicles)", it's also a variation of the expression "los huevos!", that would be like the english sarcastic "yeah, right!" or "no chance" but in a more vulgar (and funny) way.

 

[Gay Joker]

Eres el amor de mi vida.

 

[SCRAM]

"Eh?" Also see "Fuckin eh?"
"Hey buds you wanna hack a dart?"
"Go fuck your hat"

I've got more

Edit: obligatory newfie "Tunderin load Jesus bai".

 

[Meat Target]

"Don't piss on me and tell me it's raining"

"Go get your shinebox"

"I deserve to be blown first, before the fucking jacuzzi" -Mel Gibson

"Expect shit from shit, and you'll never be disappointed"

"Pay peanuts, get monkeys"

"What is this Mickey Mouse shit?" - from Full Metal Jacket

"You had best unfuck yourself before I unscrew your head and shit down your neck".
and
"What is your major malfunction, numbnuts?"

 

[Esquilax]

From reading Shogun I remember two turns of phrase that stuck out to me, but the important one being "Christ Jesus". The dutch sailors and the bong protagonist would say this for some reason and I always found it funny.

Unlocked a memory for me, read Shogun a few years ago and 'shigata ga nai' always stuck with me. Every time someone awful happened, the Japanese would just be like *shrug* shigata ga nai. Like oh well. There was also the concept of the 8 fold fence too which was interesting, the description of the dark humor of the people to deal with such crazy shit.

But this is not a book thread, so I will add: it makes sense if you don't think about it.

 

[Spider Princess Fan]

"Два сапога пара" ( two boots make a pair ) - to point out similar ( usually negative ) traits between two people.
"Ебала жаба гадюку" ( "toad fucking a viper" or more formally "toad fornicating with a viper" ) - a conflict in which both sides are unlikable/unreasonable.
"Когда рак на горе свистнет" ( "when a crab whistles on top of a mountain" ) - in response to something that most likely won't occur.

Like mate, speak for yourself.

 

[Crocodylus Acutus]

I used to have a list of sayings/idioms I enjoyed. I wonder where I put it...

In any case, here's some I like:

• If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys
• Hotter than a two dollar pistol
• Stupid is as stupid does
• Straight from the horse's mouth
• Full of piss and vinegar
• Nigger-rigged (something that is of a poorly made quality)