I needed this. I suffer from depression and the occasional suicidal thought or two, and im against suicide as much as KingCobra was.
Just sometimes it's too easy to fall into the cycles of negative thought, especially when life seems to be coordinating to absolutely wreck you and your endeavors consistently.
The last month has been nothing but lies, deceptions, mockery and setbacks.
But... we don't know what happens tomorrow, do we? My kids would miss me. Maybe my mom. It's not worth it.
Things seem like they've been pretty busy for you lately, Null. I feel like I can comfortably speak on behalf of most of us that we appreciate it. All the quick improvements you've been doing from the suggestions thread have been peak (especially the search magic you pulled the other day), and honestly in the day of bugman corporate oligarchy it feels really fucking nice to be able to actually talk to the guy that's in charge of keeping our little play-pen sufficiently childproofed and full of un-gnawed toys.
Things have been pretty rough for a lot of us, but we all keep on trucking, yeah?
My day-to-day job involves overseeing AI-guided, fine motor-controlled movements of military robots. Everyone in my work group is a complete asshole, like, totally caustic.
The defense contractor I work for literally has billions in government contracts and there is ALWAYS unfair pressure on me to make sure we are on schedule to have these "tin soldiers" ready to engage in military skirmishes ASAFP.
Well, today I had enough with all of their bullshit, which has been building up over the last year. I said "I quit". They did not like that and started talking shit to me about my security clearance level, NDAs, and all that bullshit. I told them IDGAF. I quit. I handed in my work equipment and left my access badge on the front desk as i was escorted out.
I had just barely left the building when my phone rings and one of my coworkers in that group of assholes got mangled working in one of the bots. Apparently I was listed as one of her emergency contacts? I reluctantly headed back into the building toward the hospital wing (yes, it is that big of a building), but only because I remembered that all her next of kin live in Germany. I had to go through security all over again and listen to some dumbass doctor explain the extent of her injuries and all that bullshit.
No one else is in her hospital room when i get there and she is lying alone in a hospital bed.
This is already a long post, so I will summarize the conclusion to my bitch-ass whiny story here:
TMI: My name is Shinji, and I am a whiny-ass bitch.
"Sup Asuka? I came as soon as i could!"
I'm in the process of being stealth laid off by an RTO mandate. Normally this would be awful, but the severance is good and I have enough savings to last me 18 months even if I'm sloppy with spending. Counting down the days until I'm free of this job and the jeets.
Dunno what's next in life but the only skill I have is programming so I guess more of that.
