Goofy shit that you do specifically to entertain yourself.

[Pina Colada]

Walk around aimlessly when I'm alone. Make up stories about fictional characters.

 

[andr0id psycho sho(ker]

Walk around aimlessly when I'm alone. Make up stories about fictional characters.

as the above post. Either that or doing chores around the house or yard to keep myself busy if I don't want to just mess around on the internet

 

[Inflatable Julay]

I make up songs for my cat

 

[Lunete]

Explore random towns on Google maps.

 

[UnKillFill]

Sometimes when I'm alone, I like to randomly sing various songs in a way that I can't really describe... but similar to the style of Eddie Vedder from Pearl Jam or the guy from Stone Temple pilots.

Spoiler: Examples

I didn't even realize this was a thing until I heard some random black comedian (whose name unfortunately escapes me) talk about this as "something white people do."

 

[ASU]

This is going to sound dubious af but in Buddhism there's this concept that the only way to pass along some types of teachings is through talking and listening. Deaf people can't participate in these teachings for obvious reasons. Anyway, so I figured out that by using recordings of certain teachers some people could achieve the same results as listening to them live, which is currently widely considered impossible. Then I figured out that if I memorized the recordings, I could repeat them out loud to myself and, because it was being spoken and I was hearing it, that was enough to achieve results.

So when I'm bored (where I live all anyone does is drink and go to the beach, and you can only do that so many months in a row before it gets old) I smoke a bowl and explain out loud everything I've learned from the recordings and spontaneously, as I'm talking, clearer ways of explaining things emerge. It's similar to therapy: the patient talks out their problems until they accidentally say something that helps them fix their problem. Well, I figured out you can do that with Buddhism. I don't know anyone else who practices like this. I've talked to some priests and monks about it, and learned why it works, but they told me that while it's fine that I figured this stuff out, it only works under rare circumstances.

I also figured out how to induce near-death experiences because it's tremendously helpful in reaching certain states of consciousness without years of meditation. Of course, you risk death by attempting it, so I've been almost dying a lot over the past year.

I have a very unusual life these days.

 

[vertexwindi]

I also figured out how to induce near-death experiences because it's tremendously helpful in reaching certain states of consciousness without years of meditation.

Wait, what?

I've been in a few situations in which I thought I was gonna die for real and that feeling of acceptance yet mild disappointment... that's not a feeling I wish to willingly invoke.

 

[Commander Keen]

I hate you, OP. I hate you so bad. When I was a bartender in undergrad, we had a few faggots like you who liked to fuck with us and pay with two dollar bills or tip with two dollar bills. We had everything priced exactly, everything ended in .00 .25 .50 .75 to make things easier on employees and our raging alcoholic regulars and so we only had to keep quarters and our cash was strictly regimented since we were a bar and that's what you do.

Then cunts like you showed up and got their rocks off making us spend the extra time to piss about with your shitty two dollar bills since we had no place to put them in our strictly regimented system. Everyone hated you because the bank always had to stop and check to see if they were authentic when we deposited our cash tips. Management hated you because it threw off the counts. The banks hated you because you're a pain in the taint who thinks he's funny.

Those retail slaves aren't confused and bewildered. They're trying really hard not to drag you out into the middle of the parking lot to beat you senseless so their face gets screwed up because they'll get in trouble in they look at you with an expression of frustration. So they settle on perplexment.

Anyway, I like to have pretend speeches in the shower. Like I'm accepting an academy award and I'll talk about how much the Jews have helped me overcome getting buttfucked by my priest as a child by buttfucking me as a teen and adult to groom me into the actor I am today, or just other off the wall stuff. Depends on what awards are being handed out at the time. Oscars, ESPYs, Heisman Trophy, whichever. It'll just get progressively stranger as I shower.

Edit: @Nacho Man Randy Salsa I do that also, except I do it with sliding automatic doors and elevator doors. No one has called me out on it after all these years.

 

[Slamerella]

Sometimes even in voice chats I'll occasionally grunt like Solid Snake and speak like him, trying to connect something unrelated to Metal Gear to it. For example, if I say an actor's name, I'll usually think of other movies they were in until I get to someone who's worked on Metal Gear or someone who's name is vaguely involved in the franchise like Richard Gere (self explanatory) or one of my newest favorites was when someone mentioned Rob Zombie, and I got to his Halloween remake, then H2O, and said that H2O is water, which is a Liquid.

That or just the grunts he makes.

 

[Douglas Reynholm]

I also figured out how to induce near-death experiences because it's tremendously helpful in reaching certain states of consciousness without years of meditation. Of course, you risk death by attempting it, so I've been almost dying a lot over the past year.

Not a phrase you hear very often. Have you considered taking DMT?

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

I hate you, OP. I hate you so bad. When I was a bartender in undergrad, we had a few faggots like you who liked to fuck with us and pay with two dollar bills or tip with two dollar bills. We had everything priced exactly, everything ended in .00 .25 .50 .75 to make things easier on employees and our raging alcoholic regulars and so we only had to keep quarters and our cash was strictly regimented since we were a bar and that's what you do.

Then cunts like you showed up and got their rocks off making us spend the extra time to piss about with your shitty two dollar bills since we had no place to put them in our strictly regimented system. Everyone hated you because the bank always had to stop and check to see if they were authentic when we deposited our cash tips. Management hated you because it threw off the counts. The banks hated you because you're a pain in the taint who thinks he's funny.

Those retail slaves aren't confused and bewildered. They're trying really hard not to drag you out into the middle of the parking lot to beat you senseless so their face gets screwed up because they'll get in trouble in they look at you with an expression of frustration. So they settle on perplexment.

People like you are exactly why I do it.

 

[Midlife Sperglord]

Getting stoned and playing spergy PlayStation JRPGs.

 

[cornucopia]

i have a 10 gallon tank with a betta on the other side of my room , right across from my bed, and i just sit there and watch that little blue boi swim back and forth

 

[Nurse Ratchet]

I enjoy the shit out of the occasional 4am game of Which Three Things (objective: purchase 3 items chosen to elicit a visible reaction out of the cashier &/or other patrons who happen to notice.) And yes, I'm typically inspired to play this when the need arises for a feminine or family planning product.

Past examples:

• Turkey Cooking Bags, Toy Shovel, Pregnancy Test
• Shop Vac Filters, Wire Coat Hangers, Rolled Gauze
• Tarp, Wasp Spray, Morning After Pill
• Hammer, Tampons, Box Cutter Blades
• Vitamin E Oil, Condoms, Box of Crayons

Whether or not it works, I laugh my stupid balls off for the next 3 hours or so. :autism:

 

[AnOminous]

Hacksaw, Duct Tape, Heavy Duty Contractor Garbage Bags.

 

[Preferred Penne]

Using the Force to open an automatic sliding door.

Reimagining the song "Stuck in the Middle With You" as a Macho Man Randy Savage promo. It works somehow.

 

[Very Clever Nickname]

Making up ghost stories to entertain myself on particularly boring retail shifts. Coming up with a list of 1000 presents I want for Christmas, but then making up rules like no asking for animals, or the same type of thing twice in a row.

 

[tumblrkek]

Slide on the floor with my socks
Walk around making Jojo-esque poses

 

[Swedish Fish]

Since I was a child, I've loved to sit upside down on couches or recliners, and pretend to ride an invisible bicycle, or walk across the ceiling.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

Walk around aimlessly when I'm alone. Make up stories about fictional characters.

This.

I make sounds under my breath almost like a stress sigh, but by using verbal tics from anime. Considering as a kid I'd imitate Pokémon cries like a fucking autist, it's probably just a really bad habit I had to downgrade into something quieter and simpler. I also make meowing noises, too (key is the back of the throat), though my cats don't react to it, so I dunno how good I am at it 'specially since I'll just randomly meow made-up songs.