Google Translate thinks my name in Japanese is literally "Kiwi Farms"

Imagine fucking up a Katakana translation that bad. It’s a literal exact copy with Japanese phonetics. I’m amazed google doesn’t have some sort of check to account for this.
It's not that bad. Well, it is, but not always.

Consider the word パン, which romanizes to "pan" but translates to "bread" because it translates to Spanish (or something similar) first.

If ジョシュアムーン were derived from some crazy jibjab language and the translation were actually Katakana -> jibjab -> English then it would be reasonable.

But yeah this specific case is most definitely a mistake.
 
Google tranlate is so ridiculously broken, especially nowadays after they changed how it works again a while back. I used to sometimes put my actual name in just to hear it in foreign text to speech voices but last time I put it in the translation to japanese changed it to a single word not even linked to my name at all. Can't remember what it was but it was like the word for some piece of clothing. I can't remember specifically what it was because the thing happened with several people's names and different clothing articles when I tried it last time. Too lazy to see if it still does it but it was so fucking weird to me when that shit happened a few months ago.
 
I'm convinced Google's translation engine just uses Google search results as some kind of fallback for when it can't find a good translation, since that's the only thing that can begin to explain such an absolute mess as this:

 
So wait a minute...now that Josh translates into a noun, it means he could appear in crossword puzzles.

I am impressed.
 
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A WINNER IS YOU

NOW EAT THAT KIWI PHOTO I POSTED YESTERDAY, JOSH.
 
Google and their artificial intelligence, which is also why their search has gone to shit so hard over the last few years. Somehow AI is the future but shit from 2007 still works 10x better, go figure.
 
They fixed it

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Kiwi Farms? Yeah I know him by that name. Hell, I worked with him at Tokyo. Back then we called him "Troon Terminator" Moon because he never came out of a tunnel without a scalp, an ear, or covered with blood.
Most would call him insane, but that is why the red terves trained him. They saw potential. It wasn't until they learned his methods that they truly realised what a monster they created.
You see, most guys that go tunnel clearing take guns. Not Josh. No, he took knives, clubs, hatchets, sometimes nothing but his bare hands. After the Byuu incident I got a chance to talk to him in the mess. He was wearing his blood stained hat, sunglasses, and combat fatigues, eating a pizza and drinking johnny walker black. It was contraband, but you NEVER told Josh what he could and couldn't do.
I asked him why he never took guns with him. He lowered is head and took a big bite from his pizza slice, pulled off his sun glasses and looked me right in the eyes, piercing my soul.
"I do it out of respect. Respect for the Male sex. These thigh highs wearing abominations don't deserve the mercy of a bullet, but the slow torturous death of the hands of a real man!"
In a flash he pulled out his weathered, but razor sharp knife and stopped just short of sticking my gut. "The look in their eyes when I slip this baby into their masculine, uterusless bellies is reason enough. To see the last lights flick off in their heads as they see a real killer work."
 
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