Grand Jury speculation thread

[Kramer on the phone]

I just called the office. His Hearing is just beginning, but the lady said she was 99.9 percent sure they're keeping it closed from the public. I will call in an hour or so and update.

Its times like this i have to wonder does no one really want to Fletch up and say they're Joey C/Gallo esquire, sitting in on the court case because it is pertinent to a case he's taken.

What judge is really going to give that much of a fuck? especially if you bullshit hard enough.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

I wonder if Heilberg will have Chris not say anything on his behalf cause you know it's going to be:

"I'm famous on the internet; I am a goddess and found out I'm also Jesus Christ!"
"I need to get my toys back, now!"

 

[Tennis-Ball-Tony]

I just called the office. His Hearing is just beginning, but the lady said she was 99.9 percent sure they're keeping it closed from the public. I will call in an hour or so and update.

Wow. Something is happening.

Its not protecting the abuser, it's making sure somebody doesn't do something fucking stupid in court, or more likely something that would cause Chris to tard out.

Just imagine the Jesus tard stuff he's spouting out right now about how magic his penis is to heal his elderly mother.

 

[Dogechu_Prime]

Wow. Something is happening.

Just imagine the Jesus tard stuff he's spouting out right now about how magic his penis is to heal his elderly mother.

The bent crucifix if you would your honor. I wonder if Chris thinks that all court will play out like Harvey Birdman.

 

[judge claude frollo]

I cant shake the feeling that he'll get the lightest punishment possible

 

[Space Cooter]

this. i don’t want to see christory end, but she had it coming

Barb may be a shit mother but I don't think she deserved to be raped by her demented son.

 

[Ruin]

He's way worse off mentally than he used to be. A decade ago he could pass as a slightly dimwitted eccentric guy but now he's ranting about dimensional merges in court and trying to cast spells on the judge. If he's found guilty he'll be in protective custody the entire time or a mental ward instead of prison.

Actually he's even more fucked if the second option happens. In prison you get released once your sentence is up. In a mental hospital you are detained until you are found competent which for Chris would be life because he will never be found to be mentally sound.

 

[Peanut Head]

UPDATE: The clerk is a a true and honest sweetheart! She told me to call later today once they have updated Chris's File, and she will fill me in on all the deets.
ETA: 4 hours

 

[Dogechu_Prime]

I cant shake the feeling that he'll get the lightest punishment possible

Y'all should know him by now, but if you don't. He is Christian Weston Chandler. Original fornicator of Barbie-Chan. He's probably gonna get another slap on the wrist

 

[Ms. 45]

I wonder if Heilberg will have Chris not say anything on his behalf cause you know it's going to be:

"I'm famous on the internet; I am a goddess and found out I'm also Jesus Christ!"
"I need to get my toys back, now!"

I kinda doubt it. Chris isn't totally crazy, and he's scared of his own shadow. When nut-cutting time comes in the courtroom, I think he'll have sense enough to bite his lip. He'll go into Megasperg Mode later, but he'll behave himself in court.

Meanwhile, I assume his sponsor, Null, is preparing to pay the court costs for him.

 

[SomeDingus]

He'll get the lightest possible punishment, and then he'll run over the judge for stealing his toys or some shit.

 

[Nikes_JustDoIt]

I cant shake the feeling that he'll get the lightest punishment possible

he playing the autism get out of jail card again.

 

[Raymond Burr in a Turban]

Calling it right now, Barb's not cooperating and there'll be no rape/abuse charge.

 

[Strangolapreti]

he goes apeshit after not getting released immediately, threating immediate apocalipse

 

[Hexbox]

Calling it right now, Barb's not cooperating and there'll be no rape/abuse charge.

I'm thinking that's likely, but what would the aftermath be? Surely he wouldn't be allowed back at 14BC to shit himself and do nothing, right? RIGHT?!

 

[Pointless Sperg]

I cant shake the feeling that he'll get the lightest punishment possible

As a wobbler, there is no minimum sentence, so the lightest punishment possible while still being guilty would be 0 days in jail and a $1 fine, suspended. He already has over 6 months in jail, and that can't be undone even if he were somehow found not guilty.

 

[Strange Wilderness]

Either way, it's not going to bode in his favor. If they released him now, his life's never going to be the same and he'll probably want for the regimented life of jail again deep down. The only thing he's actively missing is his stupid cartoons and toys.

You know a persons really fucked up when they only get better when they go to jail. Chris is showering regularly, losing weight, eating semi-healthy, and actually reading books. If Chris actually did go away to prison, the guards could easily install a TV and put some legos in his cell and Chris wouldn't leave that room until his sentence was up.

 

[REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!]

I can't wait to read Sonichu in the court transcripts.

 

[KingHarkinian]

If it hasn't already been said I'd like to thank the jannies for making a new thread.

 

[Pointless Sperg]

I can't wait to read Sonichu in the court transcripts.

There are no court transcripts, it's family court.

EDIT: I should clarify. It's not a "court of record", meaning they don't transcribe every word said. Instead they just record basic facts written in the decisions, file any pertinent evidence, etc.

Also since it's family court, it cannot be audio/video recorded, so you can't get a transcript that way either.