Grand Jury speculation thread

[Deborah "Debbie" Grayson]

There's always been that mystery of Chris getting kicked out of the Cub Scouts. The only time he ever brought it up was this weird, gay story.

I think that’s more likely to be him getting molested by older boys.

Not saying it happened, but it is far more likely that his gay little story was a retelling of such an event rather than it being him expressing a gay desire for little boys.

Most likely it is neither, but if you told me to pick which case is the most likely then… yeah.

 

[Ophelia]

Not sure then what his reason for fucking Barb is. He engaged in multiple kinds of sexual acts with her too so it's not like he put in bare minimum effort. Seems like he was interested to me, though maybe not in the same way or for the same reasons as mentally well people are.

Nobody needs to theorize whether he is sexually dangerous though, he already proved that for himself. Unless or until more information comes to light about his encounters with Barb, his own descriptions of the sex sounds pretty predatory/nonconsensual. Adding to the fact that why would somebody uninterested in sex resort to fucking their elderly mother.

The only explanation I can think of is he was casually “horny” and she was easily accessible. Someone he knows extremely well, not a stranger.

It’s very hard to lock someone up for precrime.

There's always been that mystery of Chris getting kicked out of the Cub Scouts.

Would an explosive tard tantrum explain it? He doesn’t like to talk about those.

 

[Chazzed Up]

Can any of these letters, particularly the latest one, be used by the prosecution to show his complete lack of remorse, and lack of empathy he has for other people as further grounds for harsher charges and a stricter sentence?

@Pointless Sperg has already said a few times that no, they cannot or at least will not be used as any kind of evidence.

 

[PsychoNerd054]

@Pointless Sperg has already said a few times that no, they cannot or at least will not be used as any kind of evidence.

They even have a stamp on the evelope which basically says "We haven't read his letters". Even if they did, they can't use the letters to rule him guilty unless they find physical evidence for other crimes he committed.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

I think that’s more likely to be him getting molested by older boys.

Not saying it happened, but it is far more likely that his gay little story was a retelling of such an event rather than it being him expressing a gay desire for little boys.

Most likely it is neither, but if you told me to pick which case is the most likely then… yeah.

not to derail, but I saw a documentary on a scandal involving the boy scouts. You may not be wrong there. Chris has been more vocal on his elementary school incident though.

 

[AnOminous]

Adding to the fact that why would somebody uninterested in sex resort to fucking their elderly mother.

Once you rape a senile old woman 10 times or so you pretty much lose the benefit of the doubt.

 

[A-№1]

That shit was so detailed and passionate that he had to enjoy writing it.

IIRC it also had correct grammar, spelling, and punctuation.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

IIRC it also had correct grammar, spelling, and punctuation.

So Jenkin Jinkies backstory > sonichu in terms of writing.

 

[A-№1]

So Jenkin Jinkies backstory > sonichu in terms of writing.

Lets just say I wouldn't put a lot of things past Chris at this point, but proper punctuation happens to be one of them.

 

[Smashed & Slamed]

Another dumb question and not one I entertain because of Chris. But let's say you commit X crime and are sentenced for 5 years. But you are found clinically insane. Do you spend the rest of your life in a mental facility or do you get released after 5 years if let's say you become a dependent for a family member?

 

[Hepativore]

Another dumb question and not one I entertain because of Chris. But let's say you commit X crime and are sentenced for 5 years. But you are found clinically insane. Do you spend the rest of your life in a mental facility or do you get released after 5 years if let's say you become a dependent for a family member?

The time spent committed in a mental facility does not count towards your sentence and you can be held in such a facility as long as it takes to be deemed "competent" whereupon you will be sent back to prison to resume the full duration of your sentence.

 

[TestTubePuppy]

But lets say fuck that for a second and assume that Chris is going to trial. What will Heilberg's defense be? I'd guess it would be something along the lines of "No one recorded Chris fuckin Barb, so therefore there is reasonable doubt and you must acquit", which is basically the go to defense for completely unwinnable cases.

In the Newsweek interview, he didn't deny that it happened, only that Chris's mental state is weak and he is very impressionable. That suggests the "feel sorry for the poor little tard" and "the trolls made him do it" defenses.

 

[JFKdestroyer]

If anyone really wants video of the trial, the best bet is to get the local media and outlets like CourtTV to realize that they'll get a huge bump in web traffic covering it. Legitimate media has a much higher chance of being let into a courtroom than 30 weens with their dad's camcorder and cell phones. Outlets like CourtTV thrive off these kinds of weird, gross trials. If they'll televise descriptions of how Jeffery Dahmer dismembered his victims, they'll happily broadcast the Prosecution describing how they believe Chris fucked his own mother.

No guarantee that anyone would actually be interested in sending a crew there, but at the very least we might get the sentencing, should this actually become a full blown trial.

 

[Hogar Grupal]

If anyone really wants video of the trial, the best bet is to get the local media and outlets like CourtTV to realize that they'll get a huge bump in web traffic covering it. Legitimate media has a much higher chance of being let into a courtroom than 30 weens with their dad's camcorder and cell phones. Outlets like CourtTV thrive off these kinds of weird, gross trials. If they'll televise descriptions of how Jeffery Dahmer dismembered his victims, they'll happily broadcast the Prosecution describing how they believe Chris fucked his own mother.

No guarantee that anyone would actually be interested in sending a crew there, but at the very least we might get the sentencing, should this actually become a full blown trial.

I don't know if Chris realizes this, but this will give him the biggest exposure outside the internet (and if it can be counted, the initial reaction by the mainstream media of the incest) that Chris has ever had. Is this the only time a lolcow has ever stood trial for a crime?

 

[Ophelia]

Is this the only time a lolcow has ever stood trial for a crime?

Nick Bate, I think.

Don’t count your chickens.

 

[Hepativore]

I don't know if Chris realizes this, but this will give him the biggest exposure outside the internet (and if it can be counted, the initial reaction by the mainstream media of the incest) that Chris has ever had. Is this the only time a lolcow has ever stood trial for a crime?

Well...there was the murder trial of Russian Deadpool if you consider him a lolcow...

 

[Tennis-Ball-Tony]

I think that’s more likely to be him getting molested by older boys.

Not saying it happened, but it is far more likely that his gay little story was a retelling of such an event rather than it being him expressing a gay desire for little boys.

Most likely it is neither, but if you told me to pick which case is the most likely then… yeah.

I almost wonder if the problem was Chris. Kids are weird with touching other kids sometimes, and Chris has shown he has no problem touching people inappropriately in his later years.

It could also be why Barb's family never wanted them around, and Chris spinning it as they didn't like Barb being a hussy, yet there's pictures of the 1980s where both Bob and Barb are at some kind of family get together. I don't think David Chandler ever introduced or let them over with his daughter. Chris only ever talks about a handful of other kids he's played with when he was younger and not being locked in his room. That's kind of strange, he never talks about hanging out with the neighborhood kids, just 100% girls that his parents set him up with. Maybe they were frightened that if they had him hang out with other boys, he'd touch them or something?

Speculation time! Maybe Chris had it drilled into his head not to do that "homo crap" because it's the worst thing in the world, and Chris decided to project that on the handsy principal at Nathaniel Greene elementary school. It could explain why Chris absolutely hates homosexual men, where as you'd think he might like some of the community's feminine mannerisms.

Honestly given his weird sexual deviancy, especially right now, I'm not willing put anything past him.

 

[Deborah "Debbie" Grayson]

I almost wonder if the problem was Chris. Kids are weird with touching other kids sometimes, and Chris has shown he has no problem touching people inappropriately in his later years.

It could also be why Barb's family never wanted them around, and Chris spinning it as they didn't like Barb being a hussy, yet there's pictures of the 1980s where both Bob and Barb are at some kind of family get together. I don't think David Chandler ever introduced or let them over with his daughter. Chris only ever talks about a handful of other kids he's played with when he was younger and not being locked in his room. That's kind of strange, he never talks about hanging out with the neighborhood kids, just 100% girls that his parents set him up with. Maybe they were frightened that if they had him hang out with other boys, he'd touch them or something?

Speculation time! Maybe Chris had it drilled into his head not to do that "homo crap" because it's the worst thing in the world, and Chris decided to project that on the handsy principal at Nathaniel Greene elementary school. It could explain why Chris absolutely hates homosexual men, where as you'd think he might like some of the community's feminine mannerisms.

Honestly given his weird sexual deviancy, especially right now, I'm not willing put anything past him.

I miss the “I am not a homo!”-era of Christory. A simpler, more innocent time with less barbussy. I wish someone had told Chris that more gay men would equal more Boyfriend-Free Girls for him.

He’d become an ally overnight.

Anyhoo, I don’t necessarily think child-Chris did that kind of stuff. However I’m pretty sure he did impact Borb’s social life as he was one of those shrieking ‘tism kids and they obviously would’ve had to either bring him along (which would’ve made them none too popular) or leave him with that babysitter who allegedly mistreated him.

Plus, as I understand it their insistence on keeping him out of tard-school had Borb split up temporarily, with one of them living with Chris and the other staying behind. That must’ve taken a toll on social life as well.

 

[AnOminous]

Nick Bate, I think.

Don’t count your chickens.

Don't forget Ethan Ralph, convicted and imprisoned for crimes before.

 

[Deborah "Debbie" Grayson]

Don't forget Ethan Ralph, convicted and imprisoned for crimes before.

Drachenlord etc.

In fact, so many lolcows have had run-ins with Johnny Law at this point you that might as well make it part of the criteria to qualify as one. Well, to be a noteworthy cow at least.