Happy Easter [2025]

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Always remember what they say about the Prophet Jesus in their 'holy book'
To be fair, all these descriptions make A LOT of sense when juxtaposed with some of the weirder parts of his more flattering accounts.
>born of adulterous Mary and a Roman soldier
That explains how was able to be born, when in the torah, the closest thing to a 'virgin birth' possible was through angels fucking and impregnating women.
>a sorcerer whose name healed sickness
Explains why he had to prepare christianity in this roundabout way through martyrdom. If he had had reality bending word-powers like the christians claim, he could have simply spoken the catholic church into existence.
>a failed student, rebuked by his teacher for lewd thoughts
Him being a pervert/an ancient times porn addict would explain why he let a prostitute live at his place, when at other occasions, he condemned or cursed people over way less.
>tried according to rabbinic, not roman, law, a heretic justly hanged
By all accounts, when you strip away the christian assumptions imposed on the old testament, his teachings do fly in the face of jewish scripture and are nothing short of heretical.
 
one more PL story but it’s related and funny

i was talking to my insurance company about some shit i needed to do and the agent i got was this clearly homosexual man helping me out and by the end of it, i said “God bless you” and this faggot took a second and said “Have a good one”

It was one of the first times i’ve said it without feeling weird about it and it came naturally but i feel good spreading the word of Christ to faggots
 
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Happy Easter Kiwi friends!

Lamb has been eaten, wine consumed, chocolate soon and nap time with movie imminent.
 
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